im needy and dependent on my boyfriend, help!

[Miss Chrissy]

i really don't know what to do... i'm perfectly happy in my relationship until something doesn't go my way. or he changes plans. or if he doesn't want to see me as much one week as he did the past weeks. i have little friends from just graduating high school so i have no one to turn to for comfort and support but him. i have my family but you know.. its not the same thing. what can i do to not freak out when things suddenly change in our plans? is there anything i can do to help him understand why i'm dependent of him right now? i just need advice. any advice. :sad:

[waveseer]

Tell him that you are temporarily short on friends and then go make some new ones.

[Mar1e]

Hmm, wonder why he turns the plans upside down on you, huh. Does this happen all the time? The not seeing you as often kinda makes me think he is not as engaged in the relationship like he once was. Do you think maybe you should focus on you when he is not around. Become more independent, do something you like to do, join a club, seek more school in fall, go for a career. Look towards something you can do for YOU.

 

I hope that makes sense. I am glad you opened up about it, some times co dependency keeps you from your dreams.

[loulee]

QUOTE is there anything i can do to help him understand why i'm dependent of him right now? i just need advice. any advice.

Stop being dependant on him ..this problem is yours NOT his. So you need to make the changes. being co dependant emotionally on your boyfriend is likely to make him want to distance himself a little . he will always be feeling this pressure whether it is spoken or unspoken. You say you have few friends. Start there..get a little busy trying to make new friends and hobbies/interests..Join a group sport..do something...this co dependancy will drive you to despair if you keep travelling this path.. ease off..he will want to spend more time with you if you become more independent with lots of interesting stories etc to share with him about how you have been spending your time..make it happen...life is not about waiting for someone to complete your happiness..you must make your own With him and without him..good luck

[Capricorn3]

I think loulee nailed it. Being needy and dependent will only result in chasing him away, so you have to find outside interests and keep yourself occupied in other ways when he's not around. Sitting around moping when he changes plans or is unable to see you for whatever reason, is not going to improve your relationship. When he can't see you, then go out and do something constructive with your time.

[thejigsup]

Find yourself some friends to hang with. That will solve your problem in a flash!