My BF became an ALIEN to me last night...

[Lucius]

ok pals, so what do you suggest i do right now? any opinion?

 

i plan to just keep quiet and let him miss me ( hopefully) and contact me first.

 

if he is pouting big time and i contact him first, it would be like bang head against the wall.

 

I think that he's being both oversensitive and irrational. From what you have said, it sounds as though this might be a common response for him - in response to confrontation/conflict. With that said, I would refrain from fussing over him and reaching out - doing so only encourages his behaviour and makes over-reactions comfortable. I would give him time to think about his actions. It's not that what he did was terrible, but it was unfair. Let him come to you this time, and show you that he has the ability (and the willingness) to suck up his pride and make amends.

 

For someone who considers himself to be so noble and altruistic, surely a little accountability shouldn't be too much to ask?

[Lusif]

He really has no right to get on his high horse to you about anything. I agree that it's misplaced anger, he's taking the rejected proposals out on you.

 

As for the sulking, ignore it! It's like children, they stop sulking when they realise they're not gonna get the reaction they want from their parents. He's acting like a child.

[newlife21]

thank you for your replies, i too hope that he will re-think on his actions.

 

i am now stopping myself to contact him first. the other time when i fussed over him, he pouted for one week, i hate it. i agree i should not give him attention, it might stop this pouting instead.

 

many thanks!

[mca1975]

he is being unfair, its up to you what you do with your money, I think its good of you to give money. I wouldn't want to get my hands dirty either, it doesn't make you a bad person. What does he do for charity, if anything?

 

I think you should stand up for yourself and tell him he has no right to tell you how you should give to charity and he shouldn't judge you either, get angry and give HIM the silent treatment, see how he likes it! grrr...

 

if he doesnt like you for what you truly are, then goodbye is on the cards

[newlife21]

thank you mca. yes he is acting so weird that night, and flared up because of a difference in opinion and being judgemental. he was never like this before. he is still ignoring me, honestly i am very pissed but i don't want to be controled by my emotion, so i am telling myself to not take this to heart. i just sms him to show him that he is the one who started this ignoring thing, and i am not the one pouting but i won't contact him again. i find him so immature to storm out of my place and then brood like this.

 

he is 40 plus, his tendency to pout had been an issue in this relationshp, i had been putting up with this as best i could. he is really nice to me when he is normal. well, maybe he is not pouting, maybe he doesn't love me anymore. i always feel insecure when he pouts. but i won't beg or fuss over him this time for sure. i hope he comes around soon...