Make it stop!?

[whatatodo]

How do I stop thoughts of him out and about having fun when I've got nothing to do to keep busy!? He cheated on me two weeks ago... we spoke last night when we spoke to each other drunk. He last text me at 9 this morning saying he was glad I called, I didn't reply. He was with his family last night away from London, but I'm betting he'll be back in London now, and probably out and about drinking with his friends... on of those friends is the girl who he 'shared his bed with'... apparently nothing more happened... whether it's true or not I don't believe it. I STILL WANT HIM TO WANT ME AND ASK FOR ME BACK!! In the meantime i want the thoughts to stop. No ones around to go out with.... and to be honest, even if they were I probably wouldn't be able to stop thinking about it anyway. I'm starting to really stress out about it AND feel sick

 

Will he be thinking about me? Wondering what I'm up to? URGH!!

[DN]

What did he say when you broke up with him - did he ask you not to?

[createhappiness]

i know exactly how i feel and would have paid a pretty penny for a pill that would make the pain go away, but unfortunately there is none this may be the hardest thing you'll ever go through, but you just have to find something - anything - to get your mind off of him and what he is doing. if you don't have friends to go out with, take a bath, read a book, go running, call your family, talk to someone about how you're feeling, but try not to waste your emotional energy wondering about him, how he's feeling, who he's with, etc. - it's only torturing yourself! i know it's easier said than done... but you need to focus on yourself and be good to yourself right now...

 

betrayal and cheating just plain sucks, it's unbelievable. don't ever doubt yourself though, you're in a lot of pain right now but just remember a man who cheats on you is not worthy of your love! maybe he'll realize the error of his ways and come back to you, but then... maybe not. but whatever happens, you have to stay strong and that means cutting him out, healing from this, and coming out a better person in the end, whether he comes back or not.

 

and if he does come back, who's to say he won't do it again?

 

keep posting if it helps... and i hope you feel better!

[whatatodo]

Thank you Createhappiness, unfortunately shutting him out is that much harder as we work together!! So even if I wanted to I can't. Our office is very friendly, and no one knows we were seeing each other, so everyone's bound to ask him what he got up to over the long weekend, and then I'll have to hear about it!

 

When it finished, he wasn't prepared to admit anything had happened, for a while he didn't know why I'd left work... and I got panic calls from him worrying and then after I'd not returned his calls and things he realised it must be about him... when I finally told him what I knew he denied anything had happened... it was only last wednesday when he invited himself over to mine to talk face to face - he was full of cuddles and things, and I just couldn't. He was never able to 'commit' anyway but it doesn't excuse what he did...... I just don't get why he's not turning around saying he actually want to try again. He's constantly saying he wishes he could change it, but then he isn't!!?

 

I can't keep busy... I almost just want to go to bed, but then i'll have the waking up and checking my phone to see if he's tried to call or text, which he won't have

 

I HATE that this will never change... and then I've got to see him on Tuesday - SO UNFAIR!! I just want to text him asking why he did it, why he couldn't commit and things... but what does that do!?! I've been sat here watching season two of Sex In The City and the whole Mr Big/Carrie just feels like me and him Usually watching this cheers me up and makes me feel better, but it's just not now...

[whatatodo]

I'm SO tempted to text him and ask him if he's seeing her this weekend... but I know I can't... what would it do anyway!? He'd either say yes and I'd be crushed or it's none of my business which it isn't.... urgh... I just know he'll be back in London today and I know how much he'd want company... it used to be me Now he'll be doing other stuff and won't be missing me I just want him to be thinking about me and realising what he's lost. He says he regrets the other week, but then why did it happen and why isn't he begging for me back??

 

I'm actually seriously feeling so so rubbish about this, it's all I can think about... cold turkey and I keep getting butterflies in my stomach!!

[createhappiness]

hang in there, honey. stay strong and do NOT text him. you're right, asking him if he saw the other girl or not isn't going to make any difference. this guy is poison to you right now. if he's not willing to come to you and make amends, you need to check out of this situation for your own self-worth!

 

right now, he's not commiting to you and is only saying things to make himself feel less guilty about cheating and breaking up with you. calling or texting him is only going to feed his ego and push him closer to the other girl. let this guy go without you as his safety net.