fiatyamaha Posted May 23, 2009 Share Posted May 23, 2009 due to a few past precedents, i have difficulty trusting my current gf. it made it harder when she confessed telling me a white lie. i broke up with her but she kept on emailing/txting me she's sorry and will never lie again (she even cried). i gave her another chance. i sent her a relationship request on facebook and she decline because she told me she thinks it's unnecessary. although she does have a valid point, my fear is that she doesn't want other people to know we're dating. i dunno what to do. when she tells me she will call me back and doesn't, i wonder if she's cheating. when she goes to clubbing, i fear that she's flirting with guys. when we're together she's very sweet and loving. i want this to be a long lasting relationship but i fear that if i invest in the time, emotion, and money i'm still going to get burned in the end. therefore i'm holding myself back. i don't want to give her unreasonable demands but when she does something i consider inconsiderate, ie keeping me waiting almost 30 mins when she's buying make up. i think she's not gf material and want to break up with her. on the other hand i think i'm being too unreasonable, and only thinking about myself. i'm having trouble keeping it balance. please gimme some honest and sound advice. if i break up with her, i fear that i may have made a mistake. if i stay with her, i fear that she will cheat on me. grrrrr..... Link to comment
annie24 Posted May 23, 2009 Share Posted May 23, 2009 hmmm.....this is a tough one. when you said you were shopping for 30 minutes for makeup, were you two at the mall just moseying around? or were you trying to get somewhere and she kept trying on another dozen shades of eyeshadow? regarding the facebook request - i see both sides of the story. sure, it's 'unnecessary.' but then again, if takes no effort, and she wants to get back together with you, why can't she just accept the request? what was the white lie? what does your gut say about her? Link to comment
DN Posted May 23, 2009 Share Posted May 23, 2009 sent her a relationship request on facebook and she decline because she told me she thinks it's unnecessary. although she does have a valid point, my fear is that she doesn't want other people to know we're dating. That's what I would think too - and would want to know why. I don't think she does have a valid point. Link to comment
Suesser Posted May 23, 2009 Share Posted May 23, 2009 Seems like she wants you to be her safety net, while she finds someone else. Believe it or not, you don't have to put up with that. There are plenty of fish in the sea . Link to comment
fiatyamaha Posted May 23, 2009 Author Share Posted May 23, 2009 thanks for the input. what does your gut say about her? that's the thing. when she's nice and sweet i think she's great. but when she does something "odd" it makes me wonder otherwise. i'm really confused about this. Believe it or not, you don't have to put up with that. i thought about this too. i hope i'm not rationalizing but i don't know if she's out of line or is it me being too sensitive and unreasonable (demanding). Link to comment
fiatyamaha Posted May 23, 2009 Author Share Posted May 23, 2009 ok, i really want to break up with her right now. i have kept a log of the "odd" things she has done. in the past two days: May 22: declined to go jogging with me to go to karaoke bar with friends. sent me a vague text at 11:20pm. i called her back and she asked if i wanted to come when she’s already there. why would she invite me the very last minute when she knows i will decline to go? May 23 can’t go to movie with me because she has “important” hot pot party with her friends. didn’t bother to invite me either, or at least, mention it, until after i texted her about seeing a movie. i don't think i can take this anymore. i've been nothing but caring and loving, this kind of BS is too much. Link to comment
DN Posted May 23, 2009 Share Posted May 23, 2009 Well, you certaily seem to be placed after her friends on her priority list - so, yeah, i would move on if I were you. Link to comment
fiatyamaha Posted May 23, 2009 Author Share Posted May 23, 2009 i pretended to care and texted her how about movie on sunday. i know her pattern now and i knew she'd decline. when she texted back she's like "hey hon how about tuesday? it's after my exam..." what a load of BS?!?!?! oh she has exam so she can't go jogging nor movie with me but she can go karaoke and hot pot... i'm so mad right now. i bought a motorcycle jacket for her to wear when we go riding cuz i care about her safety. i think i will get it back then break up with her. Link to comment
fiatyamaha Posted May 24, 2009 Author Share Posted May 24, 2009 sigh... i'm so sad right now. why would she do this do me? Link to comment
Knotty Posted May 24, 2009 Share Posted May 24, 2009 although she does have a valid point, my fear is that she doesn't want other people to know we're dating. Why do you want to be with someone that doesn't want the rest of the world to know you're dating? Since you seem to love her so much I bet she feels like she will crush you if she breaks up. So instead she just decided to do whatever she wants to do and let you put up with it if you are foolish enough to do that. If you get fed up with it, then you will break up with her, then she doesn't have to feel like she hurt you by breaking up. Some girls are just this way. Take a hint and dump her. Link to comment
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