dhjjessel Posted March 12, 2009 Share Posted March 12, 2009 So this girl that I know. She appears to have very unusual boundaries when it comes to male friends, ie she is tactile with people having known them only a few days, lets men get very close to her, and then shrugs it all off as though she wasnt aware of what she was doing. Now, this is a 25 year old girl, not some teenager. So many men "fall for her" including myself. What is wrong with her? what needs to happen for her to stop acting like this? the right person to come along? Does she need to have her heart broken? Does she just have an incurable addiction to male attention? Do any of you girls feel like you can relate to this girl? what is wrong with her? Link to comment
JadedStar Posted March 12, 2009 Share Posted March 12, 2009 She sounds insecure and needs a lot of ego boosts. Insecurity takes a long time to heal and the person who is insecure has to WANT to change. Some people like this never change. Some do. We don't have that answer. I have known women who are nearing 50 who still are like this. They just crave affirmation. Link to comment
Ac143 Posted March 12, 2009 Share Posted March 12, 2009 She sounds insecure and needs a lot of ego boosts. Insecurity takes a long time to heal and the person who is insecure has to WANT to change. Some people like this never change. Some do. We don't have that answer. I have known women who are nearing 50 who still are like this. They just crave affirmation. Exactly...... Link to comment
daintyfairy83 Posted March 12, 2009 Share Posted March 12, 2009 why do you want to change her? I know a bunch of girls like that. All girls like to be admired. It is flattering. But if you all know she's like that, why do you still fall for her? And btw, falling for her only reinforces her behavior Link to comment
Johnathan Posted March 12, 2009 Share Posted March 12, 2009 Does she need to have her heart broken? yes but she's never gonna let that happen because of how she is. Catch 22. Link to comment
LBP Posted March 12, 2009 Share Posted March 12, 2009 I dated a girl like this. Don't worry, it's its own punishment. This kind of person end up feeling very alone. You can't 'fix' them. Link to comment
girl68 Posted March 12, 2009 Share Posted March 12, 2009 She sounds insecure and needs a lot of ego boosts. Insecurity takes a long time to heal and the person who is insecure has to WANT to change. Some people like this never change. Some do. We don't have that answer. I have known women who are nearing 50 who still are like this. They just crave affirmation. Correct. You can't 'fix' them. And correct. She may never learn. Link to comment
purpleduckie Posted March 12, 2009 Share Posted March 12, 2009 i'm sort of confused... do you mean she's just touchy with people? men and women? if so, i'm not sure it means that she's insecure and do it for male attention. i'm very touchy with people. it has given guys the wrong impression, i recently realized, so i try to remember when talking to them... but once theyre friends, i just resume as normal. Link to comment
knightingale Posted March 12, 2009 Share Posted March 12, 2009 i'm sort of confused... do you mean she's just touchy with people? men and women? if so, i'm not sure it means that she's insecure and do it for male attention. i'm very touchy with people. it has given guys the wrong impression, i recently realized, so i try to remember when talking to them... but once theyre friends, i just resume as normal. Along with purpleduckie's comment . . . I don't see why someone who is affectionate and has a lot of guy friends automatically has to have a low self-esteem and issues. I get along better with guys, I was raised by five, so I have quite a few. Granted I'm not a very touchy-feely person, but I know plenty of people who are and it's just part of their personality. Now, if she is shamelessly flirting so as to have so many guys liking her, that's one thing. But being a carefree, nice person shouldn't automatically stamp her as someone who is insecure. If these guys are taking it seriously, that's their own problem. I've had a lot of guys like me, thinking I felt the same, because I always smile at people and I'm just simply a nice, friendly person. I feel bad that I lead them to believe anything false, but it's who I am and I'm not going to change it because it causes me to be perceived as something I'm not. Link to comment
COtuner Posted March 13, 2009 Share Posted March 13, 2009 Agree with knightingale. I'm the same way - women tend to behave very catty and mean around me so I spend more of my time with men. I am a generally nice and friendly person, if a bit shy in some situations, and guys can mistake my friendliness for something more. Especially shy guys or guys that don't have a lot of experience with women. From the description given, I'm not sure I could psychoanalyze the girl - maybe she is just the type of girl they are attracted to? Link to comment
knightingale Posted March 13, 2009 Share Posted March 13, 2009 Also, I'm going to assume she's attractive. That probably helps in guys liking her . . . Just an idea. Link to comment
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