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I need help! Please!


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Just when I thought I had her in the bag...


I'm a 17 year old guy, good with women and am full of confidence. Sometimes that may even hurt me. So I really like this girl, a grade older than me (senior) and we hit it off real well, went to a few parties together, talked on the phone and texted like a couple. I know that in past relationships it has really benefited me to keep my hand close to my chest and not really reveal much about myself until I've been dating the girl for a few months.


With this gal I had no problem being open and just spilling out information about anything.. it just felt right. I'm an intellectual kind of person that isn't always focused on the next girl I get to fxxk. I enjoy discussing politics, religion, foreign affairs, sex, music, whatever comes to mind... and this was one of the only girls that could hold a conversation with me. That's what was so attractive.


So we went to a movie a few days ago, kind of a double date.. I really enjoyed it I had a great time we held hands and cuddled and whispered back and forth. Then I drove everyone home and called it a night.


Now... I'm not really sure about the two day rule thing? After the first date.. but I basically texted her that night and just let her know I had a great time and she looked gorgeous. That's it. Ever since then it's been a struggle to talk to her. She normally is really cheery and HEY! blah blah blah the conversation flows, if you know what I mean.


So then I say, what's wrong I know somethings up... and I get something I never, NEVER get. I just want to be friends, don't hate me, you're awesome, I'm not over my ex. Now, I can understand that shes not over her ex but honestly, this guys a douche bag, with not much upstairs and isn't good looking at all. I've never had a problem with competition and I thought I had taken care of that and she was all mine.


I'm confused, lost, somewhat depressed and have no idea what to say, just bewildered. I understand disappointment is part of life and I have to learn to accept it, and I do. But I'm not the kind of guy to just let a good opportunity or girl pass me by. So please, help. I would greatly appreciate it.


Don't give me any trash answers like "jst tell her u love her itll be o.K.!!!". I'm plenty competent enough to understand deep answers. I'll follow any set of instructions... I just need a lift.




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I was thinking of something along the lines of... You're an awesome girl you deserve the best and that's all I've tried to show but I'm sorry you feel that way.....?


Nothing mushy like that? I feel like if I ask how to help her get over it I'm not focusing on us. But that's just me thanks for the advice

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I think that you nailed it when you said her ex was a douche bag. there are two possibilities here. either she likes a-holes because her dad was one, or she is just a masochist, or she is just immature. And immature girls like what they think they can't have. They like guys that don't pay too much attention to them and when they come upon a dude that tells them they are gorgeous, they get turned off cause they figure, well I got him and now it's boring so I will move on to the next guy. Of course, she wants to be friends cause she realizes that you are a good guy, and that you are intelligent and that perhaps you would be of greatest use to her as a friend. A shoulder to cry on.


If you really want to pursue this chick, I suggest you tell her you are not interested in being friends, that you have enough friends already, and that she should call you in the future if she changes her mind. And then drop it. DO NOT call her after that.


She will either realize she has made a mistake and call you, or she won't. At least you will know if she calls you that she is into you again, and this time don't make the mistake of telling her how into her you are, until a time when she actually falls in love with you, at which point all bets are off.


And, if you guys are in a mutual circle of friends, start hanging out with other chicks. Anything to give the impression that you have moved on and you are the shiznat, and she is missing out.

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Any other opinions perspectives? She may have hung out with him today I'm not really sure.


Yes, saying I don't need you is great and it makes one sound macho, but on the other hand that's almost like throwing in the towel and saying fine he can have you.


Is there anything I can say or remind her of or talk about or any convincing lines that would put me back in the running?


Anything goes. All help appreciated.

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