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How Do I Not Blow My Chance With Her


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Hello all and happy new year


Ok so i went out today and i thought i would try out my new attitude towards meeting girls, and that is to not care so much. Before i would put way too much emphasis on meeting a gf (which i havent had since year 10). Now its no longer a big deal to me, i would like one but its not the end of the world if i dont meet someone when i go out (its also stopped me being depressed when i dont meet anyone).


Anyway more to the point myself and my friend met this girl today clubbing and she was talking to both of us, she has the same birthday and age as me (which we hugged to celebrate) and was good to talk to. She hasnt had a boyfriend before because she said every time she likes a guy they stuff her around (good for me because i only had a 1 month relationship in year 10). So early on when talking my friend asked for her number and he kept dawdling to get his phone out so i said to her "just give me your number" and she did. I didnt think my friend would care because he just moved to another state and lives 12 hours away (he told me later he didnt). We kept bumping into her and i gave her my number later on in the night.


Now if i must be honest, she did seem more interested in my friend, but he lives in another state and shes didnt seem disinterested in me. And she also said that alot of girls dont like her because she has alot of guy friends.


Ok so now finally to my question, its obvious there is something i do wrong in these situations because every time i meet a girl it all goes wrong in one way or another and has been like that for the last 4 years. so do you guys have some tips on how to not blow this. Ill list what my instincts tell me and what i normally do in this situation and you guys can tell me what to change and not do


1) message her tomorrow (friday)- to test and see if shes interested

2) message her and ask her out on sunday

3) if i dont get a definant answer then message on tuesday


ok so as i type this i kinda see where its going wrong but i still would be interested in some do's and dont's for my situation


Ill be honest ive faced disappointment in this situation so many times for so long, that for once im not exactly pinging all my hopes to this girl. If it doesnt work out it doesnt worry me like it would of in the past.

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I would say go balls out and call her to ask her out. Texting is much more common for you kids so I guess if that's what is more mainstream for asking someone out....

I think calling is more gusty (and thereforee more attractive). When I dated online (mind you, I'm in my 30s) part of my 'weeding out process' was anyone who wanted to text instead of have an actual phone conversation. I just think it shows more confidence and interest than texts or emails or anything else you can kind of 'hide behind'.

Best wishes and try not to be nervous...maybe you'll just have to leave her a message and you can write out or practice what you're going to say first

Let us know what happens!!!

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I think text messaging is much more indirect than calling and having actual voice-on-voice contact, even if you're leaving a voice message it's better than a text. Texts can also be more easily misinterpreted.


I wouldn't do a test call - just call her on Sunday and ask her out. If she doesn't respond then leave it be, she knows from your call that you're interested so you don't need to do anything else.

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