i think i need some outside perspective

[b11]

i really like being with my girlfriend, but i need some advice. we really enjoy each others' company, but we argue a lot about her behavior. at times she completely disregards me.

 

here are some situations that have come up in the last few weeks:

 

we both needed to go to the mall (30 minute drive away). she was near the mall for a volleyball game and told me to meet her there at a certain time. she ended up getting food with friends after her game and didn't make it to the mall and the main reason i had gone was to meet her.

 

a few weeks ago she went home for a friend's birthday. she got drunk, didn't call me at the end of the night, and ended up sleeping on a futon with her sister, friend, and ex. i trust that absolutely nothing happened with the ex, but it still bothered me.

 

last sunday she was playing soccer and was going to come over afterward to watch a tv show. she was late, so we tivo'ed it and waited for her. she ended up going out with her friends and bailed on our plans.

 

here's the latest 'incident':

last night we were at a bar. she and i were standing at the bar, and she went to say goodbye to her friends. after about 20 minutes (i was waiting by myself) i saw her friends go to the bathroom, and i eventually found her on the dance floor with her sister.

 

i was intoxicated and upset; we went to her house and she wanted to sleep by herself (which rarely happens). we argued for a little bit and i went home. her facebook was open on my computer and, without even pausing to think, i looked at one of her messages. there was nothing and i'm pretty ashamed of doing that.

 

 

so what's my deal? i can trust her completely, but when consistently ditches me i get insecure. (which is why i think i looked at her message. the alcohol also was a factor, i would never do that sober.) am i being over sensitive? we do talk about these after and she apologizes. thanks for reading.

[Kiradoll]

I would be pissed if my SO ditched me like that for friends. Hanging out with friends is fine but not when you already have plans with your bf and he's waiting for you. She sounds flaky.

[lady00]

She's getting into a habit of standing you up. Very immature behavior. Once is a mistake (maybe). Twice is a pattern. I'd ditch this one if it were me. Getting stood up is a dealbreaker for me.

[waveseer]

Sounds like she is taking you for granted. I suggest talking to her about how her actions make you feel.

[b11]

yeah, i'm going to have to tell her how her actions affect me. i really can't stand feeling like this. thanks for the advice, keep it coming if you have it.