Jump to content

Ugh 4 dates and I cant tell her deal....


Recommended Posts

So I just got home from a 4th date with this girl, we went to a movie where we held hands much of the time, then grabbed a couple beers then I took her home, kissed goodnight, etc. The thing is, she didn't invite me in at all, just said "goodnight." Now I know this isnt that unusual...except on our 3rd date she DID invite me in, and we made out on the couch, but then nothing else happened.


In between the 3rd date and tonight I was away for 3 weeks, and we texted back and forth a lot, set up tonight's date before I even came home. She seemed to really want to see me again. Everything including conversation tonight went well, and I guess I expected more...especially from how she had talked. I know she isnt a prude girl by any means, so I can't figure out why no more has happened at all yet. I did try to hint at wanting an invite in tonight subtly, but I feel like based on what she's talked about and how well all 4 dates have gone, it should be progressing faster than this. Especially since it had been a while since we had seen each other but the whole time she seemed excited about seeing me again...


Is it even worth making any further effort with her? What should I say if so?

Oh, BTW she insisted in paying for my beer tonight (small thing but makes me think she's happy to be with me...)

Any advice appreciated!

Link to comment

4th date isnt that much.


i dont think i even kissed any of my bfs until like a couple of months into dating. don't worry, i'm sure she's still into you - given everything else is fine and dandy.


inviting a guy in and just making out is kind of teasing. plus, it only progresses from there. she's probably the kind of girl who dont put out that soon and wanna wait you know? respectable, i think.

Link to comment

It's a weeknight. Could it be that she was tired? Had to get up early? Or maybe she's keeping things interesting/exciting by not giving too much too soon?


It's only the 4th date. If you are considering ending things because they haven't gotten hot and heavy yet then I kinda wonder what your angle is.


Best to stick it out if your intentions are honest and you are looking for something more meaningful. If its just playtime then maybe cutting it is the way to go.


Best of luck


Link to comment

If its just playtime then maybe cutting it is the way to go.


Maybe she's testing him, to see if it is just playtime he's after.


I don't think the guy is being unfair actually. Any guy in his situation who had been away for three weeks, would expect his girl to show a little more enthusiasm on his return. Only four dates, yeah...but she had no qualms making out on the third date.


She most likely has her reasons however...

Link to comment

Perhaps it was because you were hinting. She may have wanted to bring you in, but wanted it to seem like her idea. My other thought was the same as above- perhaps she was afraid it may go further? Either way, four dates is not many at all, and she sounds really into you. Stick with it, be patient, and just have a good time together.

Link to comment

If she seems interested otherwise, my guesses are she either is just trying to gently tap the brakes so that she doesn't move TOO fast with you ... or maybe she had other er... practical reasons going on... such as not feeling well, tummy ache, or even her monthly friend comin to town?


Ask her out again, and if she eagerly accepts, you have your answer. If she shows disinterest or puts you off, you will get a better idea.

Link to comment


This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Create New...