spainman_88 Posted July 23, 2008 Share Posted July 23, 2008 So I just got home from a 4th date with this girl, we went to a movie where we held hands much of the time, then grabbed a couple beers then I took her home, kissed goodnight, etc. The thing is, she didn't invite me in at all, just said "goodnight." Now I know this isnt that unusual...except on our 3rd date she DID invite me in, and we made out on the couch, but then nothing else happened. In between the 3rd date and tonight I was away for 3 weeks, and we texted back and forth a lot, set up tonight's date before I even came home. She seemed to really want to see me again. Everything including conversation tonight went well, and I guess I expected more...especially from how she had talked. I know she isnt a prude girl by any means, so I can't figure out why no more has happened at all yet. I did try to hint at wanting an invite in tonight subtly, but I feel like based on what she's talked about and how well all 4 dates have gone, it should be progressing faster than this. Especially since it had been a while since we had seen each other but the whole time she seemed excited about seeing me again... Is it even worth making any further effort with her? What should I say if so? Oh, BTW she insisted in paying for my beer tonight (small thing but makes me think she's happy to be with me...) Any advice appreciated! Link to comment
pinkelephant Posted July 23, 2008 Share Posted July 23, 2008 4th date isnt that much. i dont think i even kissed any of my bfs until like a couple of months into dating. don't worry, i'm sure she's still into you - given everything else is fine and dandy. inviting a guy in and just making out is kind of teasing. plus, it only progresses from there. she's probably the kind of girl who dont put out that soon and wanna wait you know? respectable, i think. Link to comment
spainman_88 Posted July 23, 2008 Author Share Posted July 23, 2008 Yeah I know 4 isnt that much, its just that on the 3rd she DID invite me in and we made out for a while...I guess I expect things to progress, not diminish.... Dont know if I should call her again or what either... Link to comment
pinkelephant Posted July 23, 2008 Share Posted July 23, 2008 i think you should. everything else is fine right? Link to comment
spainman_88 Posted July 23, 2008 Author Share Posted July 23, 2008 yeah I think so....i havent seen her much but things are always good and flirty during the dates. I was just surprised at how abruptly it ended tonight. Link to comment
Rising Posted July 23, 2008 Share Posted July 23, 2008 It's a weeknight. Could it be that she was tired? Had to get up early? Or maybe she's keeping things interesting/exciting by not giving too much too soon? It's only the 4th date. If you are considering ending things because they haven't gotten hot and heavy yet then I kinda wonder what your angle is. Best to stick it out if your intentions are honest and you are looking for something more meaningful. If its just playtime then maybe cutting it is the way to go. Best of luck -Rising Link to comment
D_Lish Posted July 23, 2008 Share Posted July 23, 2008 If its just playtime then maybe cutting it is the way to go. Maybe she's testing him, to see if it is just playtime he's after. I don't think the guy is being unfair actually. Any guy in his situation who had been away for three weeks, would expect his girl to show a little more enthusiasm on his return. Only four dates, yeah...but she had no qualms making out on the third date. She most likely has her reasons however... Link to comment
ghost69 Posted July 23, 2008 Share Posted July 23, 2008 well, the 3rd date was before you left. then your 4th date was to the movies. maybe not enough interaction happened to peak her interest. i know movies can put some people in a drab mood and sometimes sleepy. Link to comment
deleted-account Posted July 23, 2008 Share Posted July 23, 2008 Since you made out on the 3rd date, maybe she was afraid you'd try to take it further on the 4th and she wasn't ready for that. Instead, she chose to avoid the situation all together by not inviting you in. Link to comment
A World Away Posted July 23, 2008 Share Posted July 23, 2008 Perhaps it was because you were hinting. She may have wanted to bring you in, but wanted it to seem like her idea. My other thought was the same as above- perhaps she was afraid it may go further? Either way, four dates is not many at all, and she sounds really into you. Stick with it, be patient, and just have a good time together. Link to comment
spainman_88 Posted July 24, 2008 Author Share Posted July 24, 2008 Oh, one other thing...last night when we were kissing goodnight she did say something about "next time you see me..." which I would generally think is an invite to call/hang out again. Coupled with the above description, does this sound like a reasonable guess? Link to comment
spainman_88 Posted July 24, 2008 Author Share Posted July 24, 2008 just wondering what other opinions are out there about if this indicates disinterest/good sign, etc. I want to call again if she is interested but not wait too long... Link to comment
Nixee Posted July 24, 2008 Share Posted July 24, 2008 If she seems interested otherwise, my guesses are she either is just trying to gently tap the brakes so that she doesn't move TOO fast with you ... or maybe she had other er... practical reasons going on... such as not feeling well, tummy ache, or even her monthly friend comin to town? Ask her out again, and if she eagerly accepts, you have your answer. If she shows disinterest or puts you off, you will get a better idea. Link to comment
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