JasonQ Posted March 7, 2008 Share Posted March 7, 2008 Does that make sense? This girl is my Friend's Sister, and my Sister's Friend. It's really an odd situation, and I cannot talk to anyone about it, because the of the akwardness. All I know is I am attracted to this girl, you could say we are friends, and I have somewhat flirted with her, and she has somewhat flirted with me. She is 3 years younger than me, and from what I can tell may not be in a relationship, she hardly was in one from the time I knew her, and sometimes I think she was bluffing. I have no idea how to pursue her, because she is my friends sister... You could say that I am better friends with this girl, than I am with her brother. Her brother graduated with me and is a different breed really, and I am not sure he would be to fond of me dating his sister. Not to mention that she is my Sisters friend. That is weird, because well, my sisters friend... I am just too shy to have to answer to that... The other thing is, that I am friends with her family (parents, etc.) and friends with other people who are good friends with them. Basically, my problem is that there are too many people that I would have to "answer" to, trying to pursue this girl. Not to mention what would happen if she rejected me. There are some people that would say she is a great girl, and go for her, and for a good reason, but its just... how to you explain to one of the many friendships we share, that I like this girl and get them to understand... Any ideas? Link to comment
HouseOfCards Posted March 7, 2008 Share Posted March 7, 2008 Listen, I have a little sister who's a couple years younger than me. My friends have made it pretty obvious on a number of occasions (usually under the influence of alcohol) that they find her attractive. However, there's an unspoken agreement between us that I wouldn't wanna talk to any of them again if they ever tried something serious with her. Like, ever. Similarly, my friend has a little sister that I will talk to and occasionally flirt with (we have the same b-day, and this year we turn 21 & 18, think of the possibilities) BUT I acknowledge my myself that it's not worth it. And unless you don't really care about your friendship with this girl's brother, you should do the same. Link to comment
AwdreeHpburn Posted March 7, 2008 Share Posted March 7, 2008 Hey jas - why not ask your friend what HE thinks? Is that a bad idea? I mean, if there's THAT awkwardness you're worried about. I'm not saying ask for his permission, I'm just saying, see what he thinks. Are you close with your sister? Would she tell you if her friend liked you? Not to put her in the middle, but she really may have some "insider" info. So she's your mates sister and is also good friends with your sister, right? Link to comment
JasonQ Posted March 7, 2008 Author Share Posted March 7, 2008 Not saying that I dont have a good relationship with my sister.... well... thats questionable... BUT... Like I said, I would say that, I have a better friendship between this girl and myself than I do with her brother, and that my sister has between this girl. Its just, I think that her brother would flip out (maybe not, who knows -- he just thinks I am weird, I guess) a little bit if I even made an attempt. Then everyone knows that I am attempting to get with this girl, and it just becomes a boatload of questions. Honestly, I dont have much contact with her brother, we were friends in school but after we graduated, not much contact... a handshake in passing maybe. I know I am going to sound selfish (if thats the word to use...) but I would be willing to risk it to see his sister. This girl is very nice, and I just cant help but like her. She is the type of girl that doesnt know how beautiful she is... And not just looks. If she knew how beautiful she was, she would be your typical "hot" stuck up girl. You know how people are always saying, at least if you ask you will know, vs. not asking and not knowing. I NEED to at least find out if any type of relationship could be possible -- before its too late. As to the question about asking her brother, or my sister.... That is just as akward. I am so shy, I dont feel like accepting the, teasing, hounding, etc. from either of them. Then when word gets out... the same "questioning" from everyone else. I just wish I was not so connected to her friends/family. So confused. Link to comment
Anna. Posted March 7, 2008 Share Posted March 7, 2008 My bf was best friends w/ my brother and his sister and I also are very good friends and it worked out fine. But it all just depends on what kind of family they are. I've found that a person's family can have a big impact on a couple's relationship. Are they the type of people that stay in each other's business, or do they give each other space when it comes to relationnships? I will say, though, my relationship w/ his sister is a little more guarded now than it used to be, b/c I don't feel comfortable talking to her about a lot of things about my bf that I didn't mind talking to her before. Edit: After reading your last post, that you and the guy aren't even friends but aquaintances more so, I say go for it. Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted March 7, 2008 Share Posted March 7, 2008 How old are you? sorry to ask but this will determine what kind of advice I give. Link to comment
amure Posted March 7, 2008 Share Posted March 7, 2008 if you act on your feelings, dont be a wimp about them like my so called friend. talk to her brother about it, tell him the situation and basically ask for his blessings... either way, you'd have tackled the situation in the most considerable way possible. Link to comment
lady00 Posted March 7, 2008 Share Posted March 7, 2008 Listen, I have a little sister who's a couple years younger than me. My friends have made it pretty obvious on a number of occasions (usually under the influence of alcohol) that they find her attractive. However, there's an unspoken agreement between us that I wouldn't wanna talk to any of them again if they ever tried something serious with her. Like, ever. Similarly, my friend has a little sister that I will talk to and occasionally flirt with (we have the same b-day, and this year we turn 21 & 18, think of the possibilities) BUT I acknowledge my myself that it's not worth it. And unless you don't really care about your friendship with this girl's brother, you should do the same. I agree. I just don't think it's worth it. There are so many other girls out there and there are too many complications with this one. Most brothers I know would not be OK with their sisters dating their friends...it's just too weird...it's awkward and it puts the bf in an uncomfortable position because the brother will probably be wondering what the bf's intentions are and what they are doing together etc...will just be awkward. As far as the sister's friend thing...if things don't work out, it would just be weird having to see her all time because she and your sister would remain friends. In addition, I don't think it's worth possibly getting in the way of their friendship. All in all...this one just looks too dicey for me, especially when there are so many other girls out there without these connections/complications. Link to comment
JasonQ Posted March 7, 2008 Author Share Posted March 7, 2008 How old are you? sorry to ask but this will determine what kind of advice I give. im 21, shes 18 Link to comment
ghost69 Posted March 7, 2008 Share Posted March 7, 2008 in a relationship the only person you have to answer to is yourself and the SO. nobody else. your happiness is based on what you want. go for it. i would. Link to comment
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