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A Man's Ultimate Guide for Successful Dating:

Dating Coach

By Dating Coach
in Dating Advice

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grymoire Community Regular

grymoire

Posted
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Excellent thread Diggity! Congratulations!!

 

I particularly liked your concept about VALUE especially in the sections "Why Is It That Most Women Like Jerk’s & Not Nice Guys?" and "Why Do Women Say One Thing, And Do Another?". I think that one concept makes a huge impact. It is sad but I think I have displayed low value by giving so much attention to my female friend even after being rejected for a date. Sure she was behaving like she was interested and wanting to meet up all the time... but we were not really dating. I should have displayed high value by showing her that she can get all that attention only through dating and not just through friendship.

 

But it is over and done with. I am very sure that I will not let this happen in the future

 

All the sections are good. It would be helpful if you can add one more section titled "What if she rejects you?" or "How to handle rejection".

 

Thanks.. good job

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Dating Coach Veteran

Dating Coach

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Last night I watched the movie "Superbad", and like typical Hollywood movies, you have a guy who does everything the opposite of what you'd need to do in the real world and yet they still walk away with the girl in the end.

 

Take the character Evan that likes the girl Becca. All he does throughout the whole movie around Becca is offer her free attention, tries to give her gifts, do her favors, etc. This is typical Hollywood. All he is doing by being Captain People Pleaser is putting her on a pedestal above himself. He's totally sending signals of desperation, neediness, and Low Value. "Oh, keep the pen. No, keep the pen, you need it" or whatever it was. "Oh, I'll buy you drinks, what do you want, no I'll buy them." These guys don't get the girl, they get used. Evan was a perfect example of what not to do.

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boo121 Apprentice

boo121

Posted
Posted

I've read a lot of what you've talked about here, and I agree with pretty much everything u've written.

 

Some more information on gaining confidence could improve the post even further. A lot of complicated things have been written in a simple and easy to understand way.

 

I get the feeling that you only included a tiny bit of information here, this is a big piece of the puzzle, but not everything!

 

I love the word "Kino" it sounds like you are about to make a ju-jitsu move on her. Initiate Kino.... WAAAAYAH! - Mystery's words are great. Neg, peacocking, 2 set, 3 set, 4 set.

 

Nice work.

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Dating Coach Veteran

Dating Coach

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Boo, I would have loved to add in everything I wanted. I wrote this article in about 4 hours on Microsoft Word and expected it to run about 6 pages. It ended up running up to 12 pages and I didn't even go into the approach, I just linked to the Mystery Method. If I had honestly taken the time to cover everything in detail, I could have easily had this near 30 pages on Word. If it were that long I may was well try to get an editor and publish it.

 

I figured 12 Word pages was enough for a solid overview. I'm happy to take questions and go into more specifics.

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MushroomGod Enthusiast

MushroomGod

Posted
Posted
I've read a lot of what you've talked about here, and I agree with pretty much everything u've written.

 

Some more information on gaining confidence could improve the post even further. A lot of complicated things have been written in a simple and easy to understand way.

 

I get the feeling that you only included a tiny bit of information here, this is a big piece of the puzzle, but not everything!

 

I love the word "Kino" it sounds like you are about to make a ju-jitsu move on her. Initiate Kino.... WAAAAYAH! - Mystery's words are great. Neg, peacocking, 2 set, 3 set, 4 set.

 

Nice work.

 

LMAO at poking fun at such a useful tool!

 

Its great when she does it to you too.

 

I would also add some things on what to do on date 1 to 3. I'm having a problem with figuring that kind of stuff out.

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boo121 Apprentice

boo121

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Posted

I would also add some things on what to do on date 1 to 3. I'm having a problem with figuring that kind of stuff out.

 

Well I usually get bored after 2 or 3 weeks and find another girl, I have had relationships, but I expect DC would be better at answering questions about longer term dating.

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Amir M Newbie

Amir M

Posted
Posted

Just as someone can learn to ignore the noise a nearby train makes when it runs by the house over the years, you can desensitize yourself to feelings of fear or anxiety. It’s not going to be easy, you’re going to have to actively put yourself in situations where you are experiencing this fear or anxiety over and over again.

 

Awesome analogy, I've never thought to express the concept in this way. I like it a lot. I'm a big fan of efficient analogies. Especially when it comes to dating. Not that easy to explain it to someone who hasn't had the necessary success to understand what you're saying. I sometimes feel like I'd need to be telepathic to bring accross my point, but good analogies such as yours usually do just as good.

 

props man, you write good threads.

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islandj Apprentice

islandj

Posted
Posted

I wish I wud have read some of this sooner. Although not entirely something "new" its good to have a refresher!

 

I also agree than one has to be ready and comfortable with yourself before starting a relationship, otherwise you may become clingy.

 

You know when you're ready to date, when you are ready to loose as you wont always get what you want, but if happens you shouldnt take too much to heart!

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VioletFig Rookie

VioletFig

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no, no and no. Why do men always assume BUSY means not interested ?

 

I have been under absolute God awful stress and there is at least one guy whom I would LOVE to date right now.

 

But until I get things less fubar'd, I've had to put him on hold.

 

I do not have the time to put the effort I like to into looking pretty, relaxed and being fun and happy right now. Soon, but not right now.

 

Sometimes women and men really ARE too busy.

 

Its kinder NOT to bring someone into your life when you are overwhelmed.

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boo121 Apprentice

boo121

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Posted
no, no and no. Why do men always assume BUSY means not interested ?

 

If im interested in somebody i'll find myself making time for that person, usually without realising.

 

And its one of those lessons, where if you're dating some1 that is always saying "oh im busy 2nite, i've got plans" they just are not interested. Better to take the hint early on than wasting a whooole lotta time Actions speak louder than words do.

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Dubb Contributor

Dubb

Posted
Posted
no, no and no. Why do men always assume BUSY means not interested ?

 

I have been under absolute God awful stress and there is at least one guy whom I would LOVE to date right now.

 

But until I get things less fubar'd, I've had to put him on hold.

 

I do not have the time to put the effort I like to into looking pretty, relaxed and being fun and happy right now. Soon, but not right now.

 

Sometimes women and men really ARE too busy.

 

Its kinder NOT to bring someone into your life when you are overwhelmed.

 

 

I think b/c most of the time when a girl becomes unavailable or can't find time to date she is uninterested. Unless the women comes out and says how she feels he is not going to know.

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