redsuede Posted October 25, 2007 Share Posted October 25, 2007 I hope this message does not upset any of you. However, I feel like I need to share my e-opinions with all of you as this site has helped me tremendously and I would very much like to give back in my own way.. We are all here because of a painful breakup. Those are never ever easy to go through. In fact in you are not careful.. breakups can slam you on the ground as you have never felt before, and it can be nearly impossible to feel as though you can get up. But the truth is.. You can... We then all go through the thought processes of what should I do? Do i go NC or LC or beg and plead? The answer INO is simple, cut and clear! There are some rules that we should apply to each of us. We are all worth it!! We are all worth someone loving us.. not taking us for granted.. Relationships should not be about breaks.. and definetly not involving someone else. NC should NEVER be a ploy to get an ex back to make ourselves look more attractive. This is manipulation of life. Someone who truly loves you does not need a reason to feel overwhelmed by your awesome ability to move on. They would already know that they want you. Some questions to ask yourself after a break-up. 1. Does this person make me feel less than 2. Am I a plan B 3. Is this person willing to let me comprimise myself for their gain 4. Does this person make me feel happy or sad most of the time 5 AM I LYING TO MYSELF IN ANSWERING THESE QUESTIONS 6 Would I rather try to get someone back that left me, or go find the person who would stay with me forever and feel grateful to have me in their life? What I am trying to get at here, is that a break up can and usually a blessing in disquise. There are always things we can learn about ourselves in a break up. Why would we be wanting an ex back that has left? Look how many people come on here saying that they have experienced the special love that only comes around once in a lifetime, and now its gone? This is something that is happening all around us all the time and we all have claimed "But this relationship was special". Of course it was or we wouldnt feel so horrible. But that does not mean it was meant to be forever. Its now time to pick yourself up.. realize that a healthy relationship is the only relationship that will work. Not once based on manipulations. NC is there for you to heal. A great tool.. and a necessary one if you have realized that you have been betrayed and left. They do NOT deserve you anymore. Dont let fear leave you writhing on the floor in pain because you do not want to let go of hope. Your ex most likely is letting go.. which leaves you solitude in the pain. This is a great time to start finding you again.. Find those things you can learn from this break up.. that way, when the next one comes along.. and if they are healthy themselves.. You are able now to experience forever with someone who is worthy of you.. and you as well are worthy of them!! Happy healing!! and remember.. DONT COMPRIMISE YOURSELF ANOTHER DAY!! Link to comment
Dominic_M Posted October 25, 2007 Share Posted October 25, 2007 Dont let fear leave you writhing on the floor in pain because you do not want to let go of hope. Your ex most likely is letting go.. which leaves you solitude in the pain. Thank you for saying this, thank you from the bottom of my heart. Dominic Link to comment
redsuede Posted October 25, 2007 Author Share Posted October 25, 2007 You are more than welcome my friend!!!!! Link to comment
kaoticbaby Posted October 25, 2007 Share Posted October 25, 2007 1. Does this person make me feel less than 2. Am I a plan B 3. Is this person willing to let me comprimise myself for their gain 4. Does this person make me feel happy or sad most of the time 5 AM I LYING TO MYSELF IN ANSWERING THESE QUESTIONS 6 Would I rather try to get someone back that left me, or go find the person who would stay with me forever and feel grateful to have me in their life? amen amen :smile: agree with every word Link to comment
jmax2157 Posted October 25, 2007 Share Posted October 25, 2007 Thank you. I'm in the early stages of the break-up (somewhere between denial an depression I think) and from where I'm standing it seems like I'll never feel whole again. Since I was on the receiving end it seems like it hurts a bit more. Your post makes me realize that 1) others have been where I'm at and survived and 2) you can make it out ok. Link to comment
redsuede Posted October 26, 2007 Author Share Posted October 26, 2007 jmax... It does feel like you will never feel whole again.. I think that is what keeps the fear ignited in us. Have faith that you will get through this.. and you will.. Link to comment
minniegirl Posted October 26, 2007 Share Posted October 26, 2007 Thank you so much for such a beautiful post. I'm so hung up on hope that I know will never happen. I'm in denial, anger, hatred, sadness, and depression. I feel like my heart and soul have been ripped out of my life and stomped on. I feel so low right now and cannot stop crying. Please tell me that one day I will get to wake up and the pain will finally be gone because right now, I cannot see past one day to get to the next. I'm trying so hard, that's all I can do. Link to comment
just M.E. Posted October 26, 2007 Share Posted October 26, 2007 minnie - slowly, someday all this will be less, much less then somewhere, someday, someone will interact with you, be a close friend, a new lover and extremely kind person .... and they will bring something out in you, you will remember that you are a beautiful person, you will feel whole and needed, warm and joyous, you will be able to reach out and care for another, your pain pushed into the back ground and you will know you have begun to heal .... and you won't look back, it will happen. Link to comment
redsuede Posted October 26, 2007 Author Share Posted October 26, 2007 It will all be Ok again one day. I am so sorry that this is happening to you. I dont know your situation, but I can tell you that if you let go.. and let the universe give you the path that you should be on.. trust.. then you will find yourself happy again. remember.. even though this is painful.. the more positive things you can think of.. the faster your healing is. Take some time to do things for yourself now. You deserve it. Give yourself the love and attention that you have been giving to that relationship.. and you will be on the road to recovery. Sorry you are hurting. Link to comment
redsuede Posted October 26, 2007 Author Share Posted October 26, 2007 Minniegirl.. See you did make it to another day! Congratulations!!!! Link to comment
redsuede Posted November 29, 2007 Author Share Posted November 29, 2007 No more comprimising yourself!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.