How do i ask for more commitment.

[demolition_lover88]

My boyfriend and I have just come back off holiday, in which we spent 24/7 in each others company. We did everything together and now i'm finding it really difficult adjusting back to normal routine.

 

Usually i see my boyfriend at weekends. He lives a short journey away from me, but because of our jobs we dedicate the weekends to each other. This was our first holiday away together and the most time we'd spent together throughout our whole relationship. I knew it would either make or break the relationship.

 

Now i am back home i feel like i need some more commitment, however i'm too scared to ask as i dont know how my boyfriend will react. I just want to tell him i dont want to be alone anymore and i would like it if we could make plans for the future. I just dont know what to say please help.

[DN]

Say you had a great time on holiday and enjoyed being with him for much more time than usual. Then ask him where he thinks this relationship is heading.

[RayKay]

I agree with DN.

 

I guess I am a little unsure what you mean by "more commitment" - do you feel he is NOT committed right now? Does "more commitment" to you mean "more time together" or a "sense of where you are heading together" as examples. It would probably help to have a better sense of what you are really looking for before approaching him about discussing the future.

 

And I think instead of saying "you don't want to be alone anymore" (because truly, a relationship or someone being with you should not be so you are not "alone anymore") I think you need to phrase it more in the way you enjoy being with HIM and want to spend time on your relationship together as you both should be bringing yourselves to the relationship as individuals whom want to be together, and choose to be, not out of loneliness.

[demolition_lover88]

Thank you DN and RayKay. I will ask him when i next see him at the weekend where he thinks our relationship is going.

 

During the week i only usually speak to him over the internet or via text/phone so its difficult to have a serious conversation.

 

I'll let you know how it goes.

[Lana0120]

Start by telling him how wonderful the holiday was and how you want more of it and go on from there.

[VeganBohemian]

Tell him that you love waking up next to him in the morning and that you are wondering what he thinks.