What makes him HOT?

[Clarity]

Hmmm....what is unattractive (in your opinion) about the successful college look?

 

I believe she said that the successful college look (I find that term to be somewhat humorous, but that's another issue) was attractive, and that the badboy/gangsta look was unattractive.

[lizziebee]

What makes a man irresistible to you, the first time you see him?

Charisma. The real, elusive kind, like JFK and Clinton have, in my humble opinion.

 

What makes him annoying to you?

Talking about himself constantly. Hovering around when I need space and he knows it. Any kind of jealousy.

 

 

Does he have to be a hunk or just good/average? Anything that makes me look at a man twice, at this stage of the game I cannot even tell you what that particular thing is. Please see first question….

 

 

Do you like him to check you out/look over at you a lot, looking like, he really wants you or with a look like, "Hey girl, you know you want me!"?

Neither, just that unaware, confidence is a turn on, slightly shy.

 

What if he drove you wild, but yet didn't really have a car, not loaded with cash, and lived in a bad neighborhood, would you still like him? Yes

[RedPenguin]

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is my pic. See I always get nervous how people view me, and even though I know I am not unattractive, I can't seem to help but get nervous. I was never

told that I was unattractive, but I never really had a gf or talked to girls, but mainly because especially in High School, I never really found girls that I wanted, many of them thought they were all that, having babies early, and going for the gansta, jail, and drug dealin kinds of people. I never really found girls I was really interested in until college.

 

How can I just get rid of the nervous?

 

What do you guys/gals think about my pic? Am I worrying too much?

[lizziebee]

I would like to see a "dry" pic of you, say in jeans and a t-shirt?

[Altruist]

I believe she said that the successful college look (I find that term to be somewhat humorous, but that's another issue) was attractive, and that the badboy/gangsta look was unattractive.

 

Thanks for the clarification, Clarity. Looks like the college look rocks.

[Clarity]

Thanks for the clarification, Clarity. Looks like the college look rocks.

 

I wonder how the unsuccessful college look would rank

[RedPenguin]

Here is a pic of me on a 4 Wheeler on vacation but I feel kinda fat or something:

 

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Here is me in NYC but I don't really feel you can see me that well and I had on a winter coat:

 

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[lizziebee]

You look like a nice guy from what I can see and hear in your posts but we need to see more of who you are...These pics seem to be hiding the real you..if you know what I mean..having your pic taken is a PITA but see if you can't scrouge up one that gives us a look at your face! You are doing fine. You are here among people who care....

[JadedStar]

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is my pic. See I always get nervous how people view me, and even though I know I am not unattractive, I can't seem to help but get nervous. I was never

told that I was unattractive, but I never really had a gf or talked to girls, but mainly because especially in High School, I never really found girls that I wanted, many of them thought they were all that, having babies early, and going for the gansta, jail, and drug dealin kinds of people. I never really found girls I was really interested in until college.

 

How can I just get rid of the nervous?

 

What do you guys/gals think about my pic? Am I worrying too much?

 

I am not going to go thru and answer your questions since many ladies here have and I think you have enough data to make some assumptions.

 

As for your pic, you look like an average guy with a nice smile. Most women do not go for "gangsta" not even the young ones. AVOID the girls who like that look because they probably have self esteem issues of their own! I would not advise you to chase any girls who have tastes for bad boys.

 

You wanna find a girl? You have to find out your niche. You have to find something that sets you apart. For many people that is something different. You seem about my son's age...probably a little older. He is 19. Here is what his niche was, you might glean something from my little story, you might not...anyhoo...

 

When he was 16 we moved from the country to a west end, high end neighborhood. He went to school on his FIRST DAY in a cowboy hat and boots. I am thinking man my kids got some gumption because this look was NOT the norm in this preppy middle class school in suberbia. Interestingly enough, tho, after his first week he said "mom the girls here like me a lot better than the girls in the country"...."all kinds of really HOT girls are talking to me" and he couldn't believe it. He is like you - a bit on the nervous side with girls...not shy around people but shy a little around a girl he was attracted to.

 

So what he did was found what set him apart. In the country his look was a dime a dozen. In the city the girls found this country boy with the cute accent so endearing. My son also has a sense of humor that is off the chain so that is also one of his ace's in the pocket.

 

Now I don't suggest you go out and wear a cowboy hat and boots ROFL but I think you get my point. You have to find something to set yourself out from the rest of the crowd. College is full of nice boys ... you have to either stand out a little because of your personality and sense of humor or SOMETIHNG. I can't tell you what should be your niche, you have to figure that out on your own!

 

GOOD LUCK> Be yourself and try to combat the nerves. That really shows when you talk to a girl. And practice makes perfect. Have the ability to be able to handle rejection without it tearing you down and have the ability to bounce right back when it happens. Rome wasn't built in a day!

[AusTrist]

Why are so many ppl obsessed with their looks?? That is not what makes a guy or gal hot for that matter. Sure it helps get ppl to take a bit more notice of ya but for the ppl who arent the hottest things on 2 legs then u have to have a bit more of an outgoing persoanlity which will also make u stand out. Either way you should treat yaself as though u look normal and have a good time and be confident with urself. Meh who cares if u have a funny nose or a weird shaped head. Geez if we all looked fantastically hot how boring would that be? Be happy that you are different from other people and ul be fine. DOnt just sit there thinking u cant get a g/f or b/f cos ur ugly cos thinking like that means u wont get a g/f or b/f. Thats my 2c for ya hehe

[RedPenguin]

Here is one but I feel I look geeky:

 

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[333]

Notice the similarities here?

 

Here is a pic of me on a 4 Wheeler on vacation but I feel kinda fat or something:

 

link removed

 

Here is me in NYC but I don't really feel you can see me that well and I had on a winter coat:

 

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Here is one but I feel I look geeky:

 

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"Here is a picture of me... BUT.."

 

You add something that will put a thought in everyone's mind before they even veiw the picture. You are you, you cannot change yourself, and you are special for who you are, so you are going to have to learn how to be comfortable with the way you look if you want to attract the attention of girls. By asking about what physical qualities girls find attractive in men, you are only getting the specific veiws of each girl who you are asking. Preferences vary from girl to girl, woman to woman, and the trith is no person has the same preferences as another, so there is no set answer to the question you are asking. Plus, there is someone for everyone out there, you just need to embrace the person that you are and show it off. Put yourself out there, you have shown us all that you have a great personality just by your posts, so show it and be yourself. It takes practice, but in order to find someone who will love you for who you are, not someone you are trying to be. You need to be yourself and nothing short of it.

 

You're a wonderful guy with a great personality good looks, but in order to find your perfect girl of your dreamsr, you're going to need to start fromt he inside, out. Build up your confidence and comfort with yourself and as soon as you do, ALL of your wonderful qualities will begin to shine through and be apparent to everyone around you!

[RedPenguin]

Thanks everyone, see I think I just needed someone to actually compliment me for once, instead of all the BS insults in High School and earlier school that I got acting like I was complete garbage and nothing while treating those who were really not doing good stuff like dropping out of school, having babies early, doing drugs, going to jail, etc, seemed to be treated like kings.

 

I think once I really get my first girl, I will feel much better and not be so nervous.

 

I hope I can get this one girl in my new class. She is very pretty but she obviously is a very happy type person, because she smiles and laughs a lot. In the first class, I looked at her now and then, trying to get her attention and let her know, hey girl, I see you, and you are defiantly somebody. I didn't seem to really get too far in class because we mostly learned the whole time but once I went to the bookstore, she walked in, and even though this was the first time we ever seen each other, she was like, are you getting books for the class, and acted like she really wanted me to help her locate the books, and then I was looking at her a tad, trying to flirt, even though I was fairly nervous, and it seemed like the conversation had ended, but then all the sudden, the second I was going out the door, she said, real softly, "See you later", but to me, it didn't sound like a normal "See you later", it almost sounded like, "See you later, and believe me, I wouldn't mind seeing you later!".

 

What amazed me was the fact that we had interaction even though I didn't really seem to get anywhere in class, so that's why I don't always think you should focus on body language as much as I thought before. Also, really no one ever talked to me from class when I went to the bookstore before and defiantly no girls and really even girls that fairly knew me really never said, see you later, especially not one that just met me like literally not even really 3 hrs ago. Also, what was interesting about her is that, I didn't see her really talk to anyone else in the class, except for what was required for group work, but then all the sudden in the bookstore, it's like she's talking to me, like she knew me for years or something. It somewhat caught me off guard. All I know is, defiantly in the bookstore she saw me looking at her, so even if she didn't see me in class, she defiantly would have to know I am diggin here and since she didn't act like other girls I seen before and say something like stop looking at me, I feel I have a fairly good chance and it doesn't seem like she hates me looking at her, LoL.

 

I will not be able to see her again until Monday, but I hope something hits off, because never before has a really cute girl caught my eye like hers, that is actually a happy smiling type girl. In school, it always seemed like I always ran into those "I am everything" types and those "I'm too good for you" types, that even though I don't like hitting people, felt they needed a bonk on the head or something.

[333]

maybe when you do see her on monday, make a point to compliment her on her outfit or the way her hair looks that day? a little each day makes an impact, and the more you flirt and are confident, the easier it becomes. But whatever you decide to do, go for it!

[AusTrist]

Hehe thats what i was trying to get at I just couldnt put it in the right words hehe. but eyh everyone that thinks theyre ugly always says something engative about their appearance before anyone gets to judge them. I think a lot of it ahs to do with the fact they are secretly hoping that the other person will say differently. U got it in one anyways

[ghost69]

Hehe thats what i was trying to get at I just couldnt put it in the right words hehe. but eyh everyone that thinks theyre ugly always says something engative about their appearance before anyone gets to judge them. I think a lot of it ahs to do with the fact they are secretly hoping that the other person will say differently. U got it in one anyways

 

a lot of the time it is how you grew up. i wasn't a very sought after guy in elementary or middle school. i didn't start to change until high school. women started noticing me more. and now, a lot more. but i still have that unattractive mentality when i see really hot women. i will talk to them of course, because i have that confidence in me. but i know some people that still have that ugly duckling mentality that they can't get with any woman. why? because of the past i think.

[AusTrist]

a lot of the time it is how you grew up. i wasn't a very sought after guy in elementary or middle school. i didn't start to change until high school. women started noticing me more. and now, a lot more. but i still have that unattractive mentality when i see really hot women. i will talk to them of course, because i have that confidence in me. but i know some people that still have that ugly duckling mentality that they can't get with any woman. why? because of the past i think.

 

 

I am the same no chicks really seemed interested in me at school or anythign it got me down but when i got outta school lotsa gals noticed me n stuff but i still didnt feel good about myself it took me yrs to start feeling great about myself and now i cant care less what others think of me im happy and thats all that matters. i love myself its wikid hehe.

[RedPenguin]

I always thought that was funny.

 

I mean no girls ever really seemed to notice me in school.

 

But then once I got out of school, and went to malls/stores, or any place in public, it was like I was constantly looked at.

 

Don't ask me why I was never really looked at in school, but I defiantly am not complaining that I am looked at now.

 

Also, what's funny is it, it seems like those who were constantly looked at in school, don't seem to be gone for as much out of school and those who were not looked at in school seemed to be more seeked after out of school.

[ghost69]

i had a couple of gfs in high school. i just wasn't part of the 'in' crowd. the jock group that was in like every yearbook picture, everybody wanted to hang with them, etc. i knew a lot of them from when i was younger. but once you get to high school, even your friends can stab you in the back when they change crowds.

 

but that mentality can still haunt you. i know a lot of those jock guys now and they have dead end jobs and only hang out with others from high school still. they only talk with the girls that they dated in high school, etc. they are stuck. a lot of them call me to hang with me cause they know i will be hanging out with some hot women. ehhht, wrong. i'm above that now. no more high school for me. it's all out of my head.

[RedPenguin]

LoL, that's like I always see.

 

It was like, why are these girls always going for these jocks that many don't eventually get too far after high school, then they all seem to want the non-jocks after high school and don't seem to really car for the jocks after High School.

 

It's kinda funny, but I guess it's how life goes, LoL.

 

It's like how now girls are starting to look at me like I said, but in school, it was like you had to either be a jock or a bad gansta drug dealer or something in my school. I guess I can see wanting the jock, but the drug types? If I was a woman, don't think I would want the drugs.

 

I have to laugh though because obviously you have to know what to say when you talk to girls, because my one friend, even though he means well, always seems to annoy the girls, but he talks about computers and Mega Man a lot. I had to laugh somewhat once, I went with him one time, he wanted to go talk to this girl, and it was kinda funny. She seemed like she was just like whatever when she saw him, but once I was looking at her, she seemed to have too much adrenaline or something, she seemed to get a smile attack and the gitters LoL.

 

It's like I said before, I must have a happy-giving personality, because often when I go around girls, it's like they get giggle/laugh attacks and become full of energy. I think also, in my community, I am actually an exception, because many guys in my city/surrounding areas always seem to have that dead look, like they have no energy, so I am probably one in a million like that one post about the guy wearing the cowboy hat and boots.

[333]

I always thought that was funny.

 

I mean no girls ever really seemed to notice me in school.

 

But then once I got out of school, and went to malls/stores, or any place in public, it was like I was constantly looked at.

 

Don't ask me why I was never really looked at in school, but I defiantly am not complaining that I am looked at now.

 

Also, what's funny is it, it seems like those who were constantly looked at in school, don't seem to be gone for as much out of school and those who were not looked at in school seemed to be more seeked after out of school.

 

See, that's the difference between a pretty face and a true personality. In school, we are still growing and learning that looks aren't everything, so in the real world, outside of the school atmosphere, people focurs more on a person with charisma and character, a true personality. it truly does make all the difference

[JadedStar]

HA you are exactly my son's age. I did not see your age listed yesterday maybe you just added that. Well at least I know I am good at picking up ages. I thought you looked similar to my son's age (also 19).

 

Do you have any thoughts on my suggestion of finding your niche? Something to stand you out from the pack?

[RedPenguin]

Well I somewhat have it with my always happy attitude while almost everyone else is like sad/depressed looking. I also where clothes that are more relaxing but not flashing like some other ppl wear, LoL.

 

I would not mind getting shirts that have Police, Fire, and EMS companies on them, and my birds, and cats.

[333]

Well I somewhat have it with my always happy attitude while almost everyone else is like sad/depressed looking. I also where clothes that are more relaxing but not flashing like some other ppl wear, LoL.

 

I would not mind getting shirts that have Police, Fire, and EMS companies on them, and my birds, and cats. LoL.

 

by niche, i'm pretty sure she meant something about your qualities and interests as a person that make you stand out from the pack, not a shirt hun, haha. Maybe your interest in Poloce, Fire and EMS companies? are youa part of their organizations or part of the career itself? Do you have any other interesting hobbies, something that is a bigpart of your life?

[RedPenguin]

Well no, I would like to later on be part of Emergency Services. Police/CIA/FBI Investigations mostly. I love Computers, Computer Network, Radio Communications like radio scanners and shortwave radios. I would not mind being the Radio/Computer tech guy who works for something like NYPD TARU, Technical Area Respone Unit, who gets evidence out of computers and stuff or the communications guy who makes sure everyone can use their radios during an emergency or any other time, except to ask each other what they want for lunch, LoL.

 

What I find funny is, I seem to have fairly good luck with women in person, but the thing I find funny is that, when I try to talk to girls on MySpace, from other areas, it's like I am ignored or something, it's like school again, LoL. I just have to giggle a tad bit.