emmecat

hey there it's not rude to ask what a girl likes... in fact it's an excellent question and one you should probably be asking your girlfriend!!! We are all so different in what turns us on, that I can guarentee that you will be earning extra brownie points just in the asking of the question!Don't intergate her.. or make it like 60 questions..... just tactfully and honestly. Most girls are pretty encouraging I think in communicating what feels good, and if you can read her body language, that will help too. good luck! PS- just to prove a point slightly, I HATE having my neck kissed.... unlike the girls who wrote before me!

Hey there I may be misreading this situation (and apologies if this is the case)- but are you getting involved with men who already have partners/girlfriends? If so, why so? My experience of this type of thing is that people who get involved in these types of (clandestine)relationships often have their own issues- mainly insecurity about themselves or their current situation. The other comment I would make is some men can get a bit freaked out when push comes to shove over making, what is ultimately, a life changing decision. (obviously some women do too!). And age/timing has alot to do with it too, I think. ie when a women is in her late 20's, early 30's, there can be this invisable kind of pressure for her to 'settle down', and men can be threatened by that too. I don't know if it that they are afraid to love you too much. At the end of the day, the right man for you will be single and happy to have you in his life....... and definitely won't push you away! those are my theories anyway.......

It sounds like she is also a bit unsure of where you guys stand. I think you are doing the right thing by 'going for it'- as long as it's not in a pushy, forceful way! If you have been friends for this long, you are already halfway there! she sounds like a really nice chick and your feelings sound genuine. Bugger what your friends say- the only person that has to find her attractive is you! they can like it or lump it really! hey good luck, let us all know how it goes at the movies

Firstly, i think it's great that you are friends with this girl. Don't discount how important that is to women! we like to be able to talk to guys and have a laugh with them and not just feel like they're trying to get down our pants (even if they are!) Maybe she is hinting that she wants you to ask her out or maybe she really is just sick of guys at the moment and just wants a break. I say- keep doing what you're doing, try telling her in little ways that you like her, but don't push the issue. More likely than not, she will come to the conclusion herself that she's fancied you all along! good luck, hope this helps some....

Hi guys thanks heaps for your replies- it's great to get other peoples opinions on such a hard subject. We have had a pretty honest talk via SMS/TEXT messaging on our mobile phones, i can't seem to do it face-to face with him unfortunately. I've told him I don't know if I'm sexually attracted to him and he knows that there would be a much better chance if he was fitter. I don't mean to sound horrible, but even his doctor has told him that he has to lose weight, so its a health issue too. He totally knows it, but I see no evidence whatsoever of him attempting to. As i said earlier, I am not perfect at all, far from it! and have no problems if a guys a little heavy, thats fine, but this is kindof above and beyond that stage. when we have kissed in the past and I've felt his, um, ineterest (if you get what I mean!)- it's pretty much grossed me out. and that is not normally the reaction I get from feeling a guys 'interest!'. aaaaarrrrrrrrgh! this is driving me bloody crazy. He feels I should just accept him the way he is i think- and thats what I want to do. But I'm not turned on by him, and that doesn't seem to worry him that much. he finds me sexually attractive but doesn't think that sex is that important in a relationship. Well, he's never had a relationship so he can't really compare. I've had 1 long term and lots of short terms adn I think you have to have it. there! i guess I've answered my own question.....................

Hi Like the others, I would definitely pick the guy I was in love with. As long as he wasn't being a bludger of course. Money and status is so temporary- love doesn't tend to be. Sex- wise, most guys seem to love it if you help them out in the right direction! it's that chemistry thing again....... good luck!

Hi all! I am new to this site, but it looks great and hopefully some of you may be able to help me with a problem that has been bothering me all year. I'm 29/F, met a nice guy at work when I started a new job last year, and , as i got to know him more, hoped he would ask me out. He didn't (too shy), so I suggested a movie one day and it's gone from there. The problem is, while he really is a very decent person, kind, giving, respectful etc, he is VERY over weight, and I am worried that I am not sexually attracted to him. When I say overweight, I'm not talking a bit- more like 30-40kilos (75-80 pounds). So it's quite a bit. I'm most definitely not looking for perfection, I am far from it myself! but my question is- does it matter? We share fairly similar values, have a pretty good time together and i definitely want him in my life. But he is very very inexperienced in relationships, not really had a girlfriend and only slept with 1 person, once! and he's 27! I on the other hand, was engaged for 4 years, and have had a few boyfriends now! So I have a basis of comparision when it comes to knowing what pops my cork, if you know what I mean!! We have never slept together, despite dating each other on and off most of this year. The first time, I broke off the relationship before anything physical really happened because I was stressing a bit about this issue, as well as the whole getting back into a relationship thing. (I love being single and am very independent you see!). then we took up again and once more, I broke it off not long after, even though this time I made an effort to be physical with him- kissing mainly. But it just kind of left me cold, which I feel terrible about. So what do I do? Am i being a horrible shallow person for feeling like this? I'm not actually even dying for a relationship at this point to be honest, but I know they often turn up when you least expect them anyway! Is it wrong for me to want to be with someone who makes my heart quicken and my tummy flutter when I see them? I have never had this with this guy. By the same token, I have, in the past, dated or slept with great looking guys who have been real a***holes and I absolutely know that looks are not really a priority in a relationship. But sexual attraction?....... I think you need it........ So sorry for the long message, but it's been eating me up. I care for this guy HUGELY and so do not want to hurt him at all, but also don't want to muck him around. He really likes me, and cares for me and he is very very sweet. and patient!! I guess my concern is that i may make a huge mistake and realise a few years down the track, he was the most decent man I've ever met and I let him go. but I also worry that if i say 'bugger it, i'll just commit to him and not worry about the sexual attraction' may leave us both very unhappy in years to come. Please help! I would love your thoughts on this subject. cheers .....