incredible

Hi Sass, I sent you a private message in regards to yours Take care, Incredible

Streetdreamer, If you don't mind paying for a date then why are you asking about it? It sounds like you do mind. There is no unwritten rule that men have to pay for the dates. What usually happens, is the guy pays for the first date and the girl might pay for the second or something along those lines. Obviously someone has to pay for it, dates usually cost money and unless you know someone who can get you into the movies for free, then you're going to have to pay for it. Do you really expect to ask a girl out and for her to pay for everything all the time? Personally, I have no problem paying when I'm on a date, but if I get the slightest idea that the guy I'm with is cheap, it will be the last time I got out with him. So, my advice to you, is pay for your dates and if you notice that the girl never pays for anything without being asked (do not ask her to pay) then just don't go out with her again. Simple as that. As for the second part of your post, about her hinting around to go out with you....just come right and ask her "are you trying to ask me to go with you?" It's best to be straight up instead of playing games. Good luck.

Dear Rob, Thank goodness you have written into the forum. You really need someone to talk to. The forum might not give you everything you need, but it is a start. I'm in no position to give you advice, but I have a degree in psychology and can recognize that you need someone to talk to. I suggest booking an appointment with your doctor and telling him/her what you're feeling. The doctor will then be able to recommend you to a psychologist, if need be. It is very very important to talk to someone about your feelings, it is the only way to get it resolved and you will feel a lot better. As for controlling your anger and mood swings, the doctor can help you with that as well. Sometimes when something is bothering us, it comes out in different ways, because it sounds like you love your wife, your step son and your inlaws. I think the anger and mood swings are from something else in your life and your family is taking the brunt of it. Regardless, you sound like a caring person and I know you would be missed if you disappeared tomorrow. So hang in there, make an appointment with your doctor, I think it would be the best thing you ever did and improve your relationship with your family. Good luck

Hi Crookster, Thanks for your message and something in it did make a lot of sense. Although I have to correct you on a few things. I didn't say that guys go out with me because they want to get laid. I said, once we do anything physical it turns into all they want. Up until that point, it's all about getting to know each other. Also, the comment about not finding love in between my legs is the exact kind of comment that I was hoping not to get when I wrote "please no sarcastic or rude comments". I'm not saying that every guy who wants to sleep with me gets the chance, I'm saying that is all they see when they look at me. The one thing that did make sense is the comment you wrote about having the sexual relationship as a result of the emotional, and not the way to achieve it. You struck a chord with me there, and I thank you. Sarah

Hi Zar, Your post was what made me write in my original post. I just wanted to try to cheer you up by writing this reply. I know that not having someone special can be depressing sometimes. The best advice I can give you is to become involved in lots of other fun things, and that will help your depression and bad feelings. I can't say it will help with finding a girlfriend, because I can't find a boyfriend and thereforeeeeee can tell you how to find someone! lol. What I can tell you is to smile, cheer up, look at yourself in the mirror and pick out the great qualities you have. Good luck

Hello Everyone, I have no idea how I found this website, but I read some of the posts that people have placed and was amazed and very happy to see that there are sites like this that you can talk about personal issues. I personally have a major dating issue. My problem is that I cannot keep a steady boyfriend for longer than a month. It has got to the point that my friends and family think it's a joke and never take me seriously when I say I like someone, because they know within a week or two he'll be gone. I'll tell you a little about my dating history. I started dating when I was in my mid teens. I was with a guy for a year and a half and for 9 months of that relationship he was cheating on me. I found out because I called his house and she answered. A year later I met someone else who I was with for 3 years. He left me because he no longer wanted a relationship, he wanted to be single. We broke up when I was 21. I'm now 23 years old. For the past two years, I have been single and dating. And I mean really dating. I'm usually out with 3-4 guys within a month. Sometimes I meet someone who I actually like and we'll get a little bit serious and I stop dating anyone else. So I'm not committed to anyone and I'm not cheating on anyone by having dates with different guys. In the past year I have had disasterous experiences with guys. First there was Danny, who was the compulsive lying violent organized crime member. Next there was Mark who had no sex drive at age 24. Then I met Jamie, who claimed he wanted me to meet his parents in Newfoundland a week before he told me he was moving to Winnipeg and we were breaking up. Then I met Loren, who told me he had promised himself that he would be faithful to me. When I asked what he was talking about he said women are his weakness and when they pay attention to him he's helpless. Randi came along at Christmas time. He was the one who couldn't get a job, for lack of looking. We spent New Years Eve at the stroke of midnight with him talking to his brother on the phone instead of kissing me with the fireworks in the background. I met Matt in January, he was overly boring and serious and would use the rest room at my place and not flush the toilet! Plus he was scared to death to touch me and I would have had to teach him how to have sex (he's 29 years old!) Then I met Marc who convinced me that we were going to be great together and then never really called again. His personality is comedic, maybe he was joking. I've seen him a few times since our little mini relationship and he claims he's not ready to be in a relationship (he's 30 years old!). And finally we are at the present (July 2003, age 23). I meet Mike 2 months ago. We were dating, we eventually slept together, had the best sex and now he tells me he does not have an emotional connection to me. One week before he told me (in an email) that he has no connection to me, he drove in the middle of the night for 2 hours in the middle of his vacation to see me, after he told me "i really need to see you". So one minute Mike is completely into me, and the next he's not. My ex of 3 years, Dave, has asked to cheat on his new girlfriend with me, just for old time's sake. Marc asked me yesterday if we could have sex again. As soon as I sleep with a guy, that's all they ever think about! My cousin's friends are constantly asking me if they can have sex with me. That's ALL guys want from me, I'm seen as a challenge. I don't sleep with just anyone, I have to feel an emotional connection, but the problem is once I sleep with the guy, he only sees me as someone to have sex with. I've basically had it with men and dating. I don't look for relationships, they find me and then I give it a chance and they put me through hell! I'm not stupid, I'm not ugly, I should be everything someone would want, yet I don't think anyone has ever really loved me. Isn't that pathetic? I have sat down a few of my friends and have asked them what is wrong with me. Here is what I've come up with: From a guy I was briefly seeing a few years ago, he told me that I'm too good in bed (what the f*** ever!) He claims that if a girl is too good in bed, guys don't see them as relationship material! Is this right or wrong people?? I can't pretend to suck when it comes to sex, I'm just myself and I'm all about passion. I'm not needy, I'm not desperate, I'm educated, I have a great job, I live on my own, I'm close with my family, I have hobbies, etc. So I'm not waiting around for a boyfriend, but just when I think that hey maybe I really like this guy, he does what Mike just did to me and doesn't feel any emotional connection to me, just only wants sex. Yet he tells me I'm one of the most caring girls he's ever met! So without being sarcastic or mean everyone, what advice do you have for me? Signed, Only a sex thing