ghsmf

ask yourself if things were reversed. If you broke up with a girl and she was all 'but I love you, we were meant to be together etc. etc." it would be hard to take, especially if you're trying to find some space. The best thing you can do is be the sort of man you would look up to. Imagine yourself being brave, secure and willing to be happy and carry on with things. Imagine being the sort of guy who can take the hurt and still be kind and friendly and together. If you sort yourself out and your emotions, you will be a much better catch! Do this for yourself, not only for her. Either way you win. Also remember the 3 most important things about getting over pain: 1 - This isnt permanent. 2 - The whole world will not end because of what you're going through. 3 - Dont take it personally, its nothing fundamentally wrong with you. Good luck mate.

Thank you for your replies. Your thoughts have been very helpful. Thank you for your concern. GHSMF

If this relationship is over, and in my opinion you are far better off without it, remember that 6 months is nothing. Its about the time you should start stretching your wings, and starting fresh. Remember, losing a partner is considered worse than death, because you have added rejection. Keep your spirits up with other interests and you will find yourself moving on. Just hold on, and be strong.

I'm sorry that you're going through such a hard time. Believe me its hard to find the person to hang out with as well as have great sex! I think your man definitely has esteem problems if he feels he has to sleep with lots of other woman to 'find himself' or even 'her'. People dont have to sleep with several people to find that special someone. Sometimes 'I don't know' means no (at the moment). You seem to have a lot to offer each other, but remember that good things are good to you. Take care of yourself, and be patient. If its meant to work out - you will find a way.

I'd like a little advice on how to forgive. My girlfriend and i had been together for 5 years and we had been engaged for 1. We were coming up to our wedding and she told me she didnt know if I was 'the one' I was devastated, she had made a close guy friend at the time and she said she had feelings for him that made her question what she felt for me. She left me in August and I was crushed. Anyway, to cut a long stry short, she began sleeping with the afor-mentioned guy (some tanned adonis from the gym). No problem with that right? She had been honest etc? 4 months later she came to my door and said she had left because she had been afraid of commitment and was just plain scared. She said she couldnt imagine life without me. I didnt think at the time, I took her back with "open arms". The engagement was back on etc. etc. I was amazed she chose me! This might normally be the beginning of a beautiful ending? Heres the hard bit - now we've been back together for 6 months and the 'dust has settled' I still cant forgive what happened (or get over it!). I still find myself very angry and jealous about what happened. I know all the things they say about 'moving on' and being positive, but I'm still in so much pain. At the moment I'm in limbo because I still feel so betrayed, but really want to be happy again. I dont want to discuss this with her because it feels like I'm 'bringing back the past'. She has been very supportive (as much as I could expect) but I still feel really short-changed sometimes. I truly feel like I'm the one who doesnt deserve her because I cant get on with things. I will lose her again if I cant get through these feelings, this time it will be my fault for not being a 'Big enough' person. If I cant forgive her actions, especially with someone who loves me what does this make me? Please help - anyone whos forgiven before, how did you do it? I've been trying to be patient, how long do I try?