Okay, I guess I'll try to keep this simple. I have been with my girlfriend for 10 years (I'm gay). On oct. 6, she told me she "wanted to be single". What could I say? Emotionally I'm a wreck, but mentally I can see that I would be more and more unhappy as time went on.
Our big issue has always been about money. She owns a business and is doing great. I have a traditional 9-5 job, and could be considered middle class. In the beginning of our relationship, she tried to pay for every date, as well as being a "big shot" and setting up entire bars for drinks, etc. I thought a lot of people used her, so I insisted on paying for at least every third date or so. You know, just to NOT be a user, and because I'm proud. She moved in with me, in the place I lived, and the next 6 years were happy. Then about 4 years ago, SHE bought a condo -- very expensive and on the ocean. Once we moved their, it was "HER" place. Her friends always said "---'s house". She'd never correct them, or say "OUR house", you know. Then she started taking more and more trips without me. She didn't offer to pay my way, so I couldn't go anyway. I mean like a cruise to Greece for 3 weeks -- no I don't have 6-8K to spend. The trips were longer and long, and more and more lavish. In the last year, I was sick of it. (By the way, I am one of the least jealous types you'd ever meet, so it wasn't jealousy, it was being left out). I was starting to feel her friends were more important than me.
So almost 4 weeks ago, it was confirmed. She wants to be single. She wants to travel. She can afford it, she has the time to do it, and the friends to do it with. I am devestated. And feel foolish. I re-painted the entire condo, and did absolutely every improvement to it that has been done. I cleaned, I did the laundry. I don't know ... and for the last 3 years, we never went out alone. Only with friends. That she would treat friends to dinner and drinks. I mean to the tune of about 2,000 a month! But never helped me, never offered to pay my way for one of these trips. I am just babbling now ...
I guess I am looking for insight. Or maybe just to feel that someone is listening. I feel thrown away. Emotionally ruined. But there is a little voice in the back of my head that says, mentally, I would have gotten more and more tired of being left behind. It made me feel unwanted. Unappreciated. Unloved. I'm a friking mess today.
