Newo Ikkin

Good on you girl!

Refrain from rubbing it in his face though - you're better than that!

Just enjoy the smooches of the new guy.

The real shame is that if the don't follow those rules they can lose their jobs simply for trying to do their job too well. There is a very fine line that must be very hard to walk in cases like this.

I do see what you're saying there.

Such a shame.

"While the police do not always have the authority to stop the suicide attempt itself, in some countries including some jurisdictions in the US, killing oneself is illegal.

In most cases law enforcement does have the authority to have people involuntarily committed to mental health wards. Usually a court order is required, but if an officer feels the person is in immediate danger she can order an involuntary commitment without waiting for a court order. Such commitments are for a limited period, such as 72 hours – which is intended to be enough time for a doctor to see the person and make an evaluation. After this initial period, a hearing is held in which a judge can decide to order the person released or can extend the treatment time. Afterwards, the court is kept informed of the person's condition and can release the person when they feel the time is right to do so. Legal punishment for suicide attempts is extremely rare."

Thats all I could get from good ol' Wikipedia.

I'm about to go investigate...*trots off*

Thats a very good question. I too would like to know the answer, for curiosities sake. I guess the authorities would be able to, yes. You see it on TV. But if it was a concerned friend? Would that in fact be another story?

I suppose it can be seen as a type of Stockholme Syndrome. In many cases, the abuse becomes routine. Development of a relationship between abuser and abusee sometimes becomes inevitable (completely different to the relationship they already have). Bah, Hubman's right...this is so difficult to answer.

Ren, please don't cut down meals 3 meals is a healthy amount! If you REALLY want to lose weight (I think you look gorgeous anyway!) focus on changing what's in the meals. Mooch around for low fat, low calorie recipies and eat until your heart is content!

You're one of the most positive people I know - I admire that so!

xx

If a gf is self-harming after promising they'll stop,

blaming them for breaking the promise just adds to their stress.

Not only might they feel bad for cutting, but for letting you down.

Got it in one.

Thanks, Newo

 

I suspected it was sometimes spurred by hidden urges.

If so, taking it personally would be counter productive.

 

People often wonder why an outwardly happy and successful person

has demons. Sometimes they just do.

Hope you didn't find me answering your question patronising (wow, I have a real paranoia about being patronising at the moment...)

I dont quite understand the second sentence...maybe its me being plain dumb.

As for the rest..I very much agree. Masks make the demons hard to detect. From experience.

OP: Without patronising, or repeating what anybody else has said, I believe that you yourself need to learn the ins and outs of self-infliction. In this case, to help is to truly understand. Honey Pumpkin has given you some great tips - particularly about not taking it personally. If you say dont and she does, she's not doing it to spite you. In that way you can compare it to Tourettes syndrome: a lot of the time it is involuntary, even if you know it's gonna hurt someone along the way.

Good luck. x

^ I strongly believe the desire to self harm can develop from literally anything. Even overwhelming positive emotion that you're just not too sure how to deal with, or whether you deserve it.

Hmmm...fishy...tres fishy..

Dont pass it up. Confront her. Confront him. Listen to both stories.

...Urgh.

It is definitely too young to get married if you are looking at marriage as just wanting it to be over..

It was a joke.

As long as you're committed to each other and have your lives in order, there is nothing wrong with marrying at that age.

Amen to that, sister!

Call me naive but there sounds nothing strange in that. Bugger me, I want it to be over with by 22!

Neither of you know until you try, eh! There's nothing wrong as just numbers...but if you clash, you gotta problem, lol!

Congratulations

as the PP said, they cannot fix the problems for you, but I know thats not quite what you meant.

Six of one, half a dozen of the other. Some people despise the work they do, others live by them.

My counsellor is lovely. We're currently working on 'caretaker' issues, and looking at ways to put myself before others.

They work on issues with you, help you reach the root of things, help you to rationalise things...I have no beef with them.

...Oh, poo.

Pardon me for asking, but is it a hearing problem, or an attention one? Just for clarification.

We're here if and when you're ready to talk. Having known the threat of break-ups before an engagement, I know how it feels if thats any consolation at all. *hugs*

My man, my mum, Chosen One II and Chosen One: Version 2.0

I have trust in a limited number of people.

Only you can know the answer to that! But you're thinking logically and being supportive - I think its perfect if its genuine.

Excuse the pun, but is he anal in regards to other aspects of life, i.e. cleanliness, and order?

My wonders exactly.

Though the fact that he enjoys anal defeats the idea of him being a clean freak.

Is it the body fluid itself or the feel of it on you both afterwards? Sometimes it does get a tad uncomfortable, I must say.