Andy 11

Thank you everyone. We will always have the greatest respesct for each other no matter what the out come, of this im sure. Up until this afternoon all of our communication has been pretty sombre but we have started havin a laugh and a joke again. I read some advie on here about making her remember the person she first fell in love with and Im trying hard to bring that back again. I love her so much though all I need is one chance and its like you said if SHE want it enough then she will give me one more chance Thanks again

To make ti harder for everyone how would you tell if a girl was flirting with you by text messaging after she had just broken up with her boyfriend, Sorry I know this is a tough question !!!!

No there wasn't anyone else involved just a lot of confusion on my part !! I thought that I might want to meet someone new though but now I realise i didn't.

I really am trying to be positive towards her, its just hard knowing that she could possibly move on. I will from now on though tell her a joke rather than pouring out my emotions. I am listening to your advice but struggling to implement it. Im positive that I can do it though and I know you are all helping to build my will power up with your advice.

Once again thankyou, This is the first time I have been heartbroken so there are so many questions flying around in my head, lots of loose ends and every now and then one will come to the surface and I just have to ask someone so thanks for being patient with me

I cant get close enought to her to show her that I really mean it this time though and would it really be advisable to keep pressuring her anyway ??

Seeing as I might be the odd one out in here then i need to try and see things from your side. I know I have completely wrecked the trust my ex had for me, She sais that if we get back together then every time we have a fight she will be expecting me to walk out on her again . . Do you all have the same fears and do you think that trust will be completely whole again ???

I did have a really good night, I also got up this morning feeling a bit better but im suffering from emotion swings at the moment. Im debating going down to spend a month or two on the coast if her decision is not the one im hoping for. Im not to sure if this will help or leave me feeling to alone though ???

Just one more quick thing to tell you, Im actually going out tonight for the first time since telling her I wanted to get back together, Its only to a comedy night but its a little step.

This time I would actually move to croydon and for the time being I would have to rent a room somewhere, she said it would not be comfortable with us living back together straight away. I would also give her my un-divided attention rather than neglect the love she holds for me and up till 5 weeks ago that was a lot of love, She said that she had been getting used to being single and getting her life back on track and this is what im trying to do now. So the roles have been reversed and to be honest I completely deserve it but I just hope there is a light at the end of the tunnel

Reverse the situations and ask yourself if you would do it because I think I would check from time to time. I'd say it's human curiosity !! Could be wrong though ...

I have been reading all day, it really has helped to collect my thoughts together and also look at it from her point of view. I just dont know if I have pushed the barrier to far this time. I know im being impatient and there is no quick fix here. It just hurts as you all know, sitting here waiting for her decision which comes on Saturday week. I also have to go and stay in her flat from this friday morning till monday evening to look after the cat as she is away visiting her parents. Its seems slightly pathetic but since reading on here this morning abot NC I have decided to give it a go and its been 6 hours which between us is not bad. Scruff on a personal level, Thank you for taking the time with me. It helps no end just knowing there is someone who wants to help

definitely

So how would you find out if she has been talking to another guy, as in my case I know she has been textin a guy who worked for the same company but he worked in bristol while she worked in Croydon. Her messages have been along the line of " i have never been a girly girl but im just doing my make up to go out" and I dont know what he sent but her reply was ? ? ? xxx

Right here go's then, Were both 22 but She is from Croydon and I'm from Chelmsford. We have been together over 3 years and about 2 and a bit years ago I moved to Croydon and we got our first flat together. I was still working in Essex so I was doing 4 hours of commuting everyday. I didn't have a problem with this at first but over time it started grating on me. Now because I had left my friends back home we tended not to go out all that much. She didn't mind this because she is and always has been very grown up. I started to feel trapped and told her about it, I also told her that I thought she was boring. I regret terribly saying these things and to say that I have treated badly is a bti of an understatement, I know up until the point I broke up with her that she loved me unconditionally, that was 5 weeks ago. Durin the break up I also told her that I hated Croydon and swore on my life that I would never live there ... Stupid words that I through out without thinking. Now she sais that she doesn't know if she can trust me when I say that im willing to move back up there but do it properly this time, i.e get another job in croydon,that it is ime t start growing up now, become more responsible with my money and most importantly I feel, treat her right and show her the love that I have only just realised I truly feel for her. I just can't seem to convine her that in 6 months time we wont be back in the same posistion of me being bored. I know I wont because im ready to make a full commitment to her and our relationship.