beautiful_monkey

Please just askj yourself- can I make it through the next 8 hours? You can jump ship any time, but give it another eight hours. Then another eight, then another. Things can and will change....after all if you are at rock bottom, the only way is upwards....people are here for you and though all you feel is nothingness there is life beyond this state. There is. hang on in there, we do care, even as mere strangers. BM xxxxxx

over the past couple of weeks, after a 8 years of on-off depression/OCD/anorexia, ive had a few moments where ive come very close to suicide. essentially it comes down to issues i have with relationships (i find them stifling or i mess them up), the issues ive always had with self esteem , paranoia, body loathing, etc as well as being very prone to depression. my parents dont *do* mental illness. i can act happy but i *act out*.....in weird behaviour, over-confidence etc etc, i have genuinely scared some of my friends..theyve stuck by me but have admitted i can scare them...i can be manic, violent one day then so calm it seems like im stoned the next...the littlest thing gets to me and i feel like i cant ever be happy....i just feel awful. last week i went to bed at about 7pm cos i just couldnt face living amymore that day...used to be 11pm-6am. the last thing was this morning i weighed mysefl at a mates house and i was so heavy...but ppl tell me im slim...but...oh god i just dont know thanks for listening....i shouldnt feel this way i have family+friends+sxhool+bf+job+voluntary and community work............but i hate it all. i feel ugly and worthless and i know some ppl would be very sad if i killed myself but after awhile theyd get over it. b_m (17/f)

I read your post and my reaction is: you dont seem mentally ill at all, but you have gone through a bad event in your life of this girl not returning your affections. Its not a mental illness or fault with you - its just a fact that you really really liked her and will have a hard time moving on, but you arnt crazy. its just that things didnt work out this time. give yourself time to move on, i did and i managed it. emili

Please don't become too hopeful - if he says he has another girlfriend now, I wouldnt have thought he'd want to get back together with you. And even if he did, do you really want someone who left you with no reason, and appeared to move on extremely quickly, then came back? Hear him out, but be honest about the sort of person he is and whether hes really any good for you.

he certainly is mature enough and my friends all think hes older than he is, so its not just me being delusional!! thank u so much for encouragement ,64bit emili

no we dont lol, never heard of hazelwick! thank u both xx

I always like to think the best of people but this sounds very, VERY wrong....i really doubt its a case of love, more a desire for sex. keep him as an occasional ONLINE friend and focus on reallife people nearer your age.

I would have thought thats fine, it sounds like you have a relationship you really care about.....but yeh observe the age of consent!

Hi everyone, im a 16 year old girl and have recently fallen for a guy who i only found out is 2.5 years younger than me AFTER I fell for him. Right now Im 16 and hes 14. Im 17 in a month, hes 15 in october. I realised he was younger because Im a lower- sixth former allowed to wear own clothes and he was in uniform but i honestly thought he was just a year younger than me, cos of his appearance and his attitude. We go to the same school and he got to know one of my friends (who is my age) through a school play, so my friend ended up introducing us one lunchtime...thats how we know each other. I am fairly experienced in relationships and have had several boyfriends my own age/older (last one ended a few weeks back) but noone ever seemed half as right as this guy, who is kind, mature (obviously lol) fun and really intelligent. I can talk to him about anything and we got on very well from the start. Hes a committed christian (and is away on a convention right now), im not, but this doesnt seem to matter...neither did the age until...i dont know! I really wasnt planning to sleep with him -id honestly wait for him to be 16, hes that special- but some people might think that I was...and..urgghh...but hes so fantastic and we get on so well. .............?