RabidTiger

I was just joking around. That would be sad to go drink because of that.... I just feel embarrassed for whatever reason.... I really don't want to be in class with her on Tuesday now. LOL. Thankfully next week is a short week with Thanksgiving. Thanks for the advice iceman. It's a rush though...been so long since i've been in the game.

what I was afraid of. i think it's miller high life time now.

I finally had to cajones, to ask this girl out to coffee in one of my classes. We had only talked once before... but we would always make some long eye contact. Anyways...I was gonna ask her out to coffee, but prefaced the question with...are you dating anyone right now....well she is....and i think i mighta freaked her out now. I didn't like how her body language was, it was like "OMG I think I need to hurry up and go". She was ready to bolt the other way after I had asked LoL...I feel so thinking about it right now. Only a couple more weeks of school. This is the first time i've ever been "denied." Feel like I need to skip class now and bury my head somewhere. That's not good...so how do I make the situation less awkward now in class? I sit right by her. LoL..this is not a good start to single life...with the first crush I have had since my ex broke up our 5 year relationship. oh well...it's good to know at least...all this makes life fun and interesting.

you may have something in your stomach... other things you can try are: flossing, using those tongue scrappers (lots of bacteria on the tongue), brushing your tongue with toothpaste, and always use Listerine. It stings, but it's an antiseptic and kills bacteria that causes bad breath. Don't use Scope...it only masks the breath for awhile.

For me...I pick and chose spots of when to hang out with mutual friends. I didn't want to stop life because she was there...and other times I didn't think I could emotionally handle being around her so I didn't go. For me it was a hear by ear situation. The key part is to have a good time with your friends...and if you believe that certain time you won't be able to compose yourself around her, then do something else. Showing weakness around her will reassure her decision of breaking up with you.

Actually i've done a pretty good job of not seeing her. I've been keeping NC on my part and just when I get down and feel like breaking and calling...she happens to call. Well...this past Tuesday, she called and asked me out to dinner and I agreed having not seen or talked to her since the call I was talking about in the above post. (A little over a week). Dinner was good, and was getting ready to drop her off at the sorority house, but she didn't seem to want to get out of the car and we talked for about 10-15 minutes. We ended up kissing, and after we kissed she started crying. She suggested we go back to my apartment to talk about our relationship so that we could be more private. I talked first about what went wrong in the relationship and she smiled and said "good answer." She then went on to say that she still wanted to be single, and that both of us seem to have done a lot of growing while we've been away from each other. After that, she started getting intimate with me and spent the night (both of us don't believe in pre-martial sex). For the rest of the night...we act like we never broke up. Anyways....I just got another call from her today (I didn't pick up and let it go to voicemail). She wanted to see what I was doing tonight. I am so confused as to what she is feeling about me. I mean...after we kissed the first time, she's crying and wants to talk about the relationship....and then when we talk...she still feels that being single is a good thing. Is she stringing me along needing the occasional intimate session? But why would she want to talk about the relationship. Even she asked "what our status was." Should I keep giving in to meeting her up....or should I hold back a little and leave her wanting more? So confused right now.

from a person that is going through the same thing right now...don't worry about her. Try to keep yourself busy that way you'll have less time worrying about her calling. I felt the same exact way you did...thinking....my ex- will never call me just to see what's up. Well....after two months, she finally called me. Yea it was nice that she called, but I am still not ready to break NC with her....so it almost seems moot. Be strong and work on yourself....even if she hasn't call you during NC, I bet you will be a pleasent surprise to her when you are ready to contact her. Thank goodness for me it's football season...my weekends go by nicely.

I need some objective advice as I am a little confused right now. My ex-gf of 5.5 years broke up with me 2 months ago. The gyst of the reason was she was dating me since she was 15 and wanted to be single, and basically got scared of being committed for so long and that I was her one and only bf. Understandable since she started dating me at such a young age. She isn't closed to the idea of getting back to together...by her saying "if it is meant to work, then things will end up working out in the end." I've basically kept NC going pretty well doing my own thing for the past 2 months. It hasn't been complete NC, but it's pretty close. We have some club meetings that meet about twice a month, that make seeing her unavoidable. She has for the most part respected my wishes for NC only calling me a couple of times to check up on me because my mom was diagnosed with cancer 3 weeks after we broke up (not a fun time) We've hung out together 3-times on our own free-will. Once for my birthday (also 3 weeks after we broke up), twice going out for coffee. The 2nd time being a good outing and she told me she enjoyed quite a bit (2 weeks ago). Anyways....this past Friday, we had a business club meeting with a bunch of people and she was there. We had light conversation. Then we were sitting next to each other in a group listening to another guy talk about his long-term relationship...basically saying he's not ready for the next step, and I could tell she saw paralells in what he was saying relative to our situation. I think she noticed I zoned out, and asked if I was upset. I played it off, and she asked me if I wanted to get together later on in the night and talk about it. I declined because I wanted to stay strong, and I had made plans to meet my friends (I didn't tell her this part). On Sunday, she called "just to see what I was up to." The first time she had called me for non-"business" reasons in the 2 months we've been broken up. I found this call interesting since we had just seen each other just 2 days before and a light talk about what was going on. I've been good about not calling her to see "what's up" only emailing her once. At this point I am not sure what to think about how she feels. I think she still sees her decision to breaking up as a good one, but not 100% sure. There are other things she does that seem curious to me. Before she never ever signed on to AIM, but she started doing that and leaving away messages. It just seems like she's doing that to get me to notice her or IM her (which I haven't). Also, during football games she notices where I am in the stadium or notice that I didn't go to the game. After the first game of the season, she went out of her way to find me to talk to me, and lost track of her friends. The student section at our university is 20,000 people big. I was wondering is she actually missing me and having doubts about her decision? More likely missing me as just a friend? I am not sure. I know it is human nature to perceive things the way you want it to be and that's why I am asking for an objective view. I guess it's obvious I should continue NC as I still have these hopeful thoughts of us getting back together. I hate these parts of the relationship, it just seems like one big game right now.

I know how you 2 feel. I got my ex- crazy about LSU football. I've been going to all the games with her for the past 4 years. I don't even know who to go with at this moment. We always go to one away game a year too. Right now I'd rather trade the National Championship LSU won last year to go to "Death Valley on a Saturday Night" with my -ex.

Actually I am really confident she wasn't seeing anyone else. Her family upbringing, moral beliefs, stance on premarital sex, etc. lead me to be certain she wasn't seeinig anyone. That's one major aspect that makes her so attractive to me. Not your typical, party, fun, crazy, Girls Gone Wild girl. I haven't done too much thinking about how her career mindedness and our relationship, but that is something good to think about.

Background info My g/f and I have been dating for 5 1/2 years. We started dating back in high school. I was 17 and she was 15 at the time. We attend the same university in our hometown. We are both about to turn 23 and 21 respectively. She wanted and I gave her a promise ring for our 4 year anniversary, so it's a pretty serious relationship. We have talked about long-term plans and marriage. No huge problems...just typical ups and downs along the way. I am asian-american and she's caucasian (just fyi, this shouldn't really matter). Now to the present.... My g/f was in NYC for an internship all summer (being away from each other all summer is nothing new, in fact we've done it every year of our relationship). Big city, so much to do...city that never sleeps. Anyways, in mid-July, we talked on the phone like any other day, but I decided to bring up some issues that bothered me. I felt that she wasn't making much of an effort to keep in touch or call. Well the conversation ended up leading to her saying "I need a break". There wasn't much explanation, but she said she didn't feel like being "confined" in a relationship. especially while she was in NYC." She didn't want to worry about giving me the obligated phone call basically and wanting to be "Independent". We agreed to not talk about it or just talk until she got back from NYC. I believe she did a lot of growing up in NYC and all the new experiences up there made her rethink about her long-term thoughts and plans. She's a very career-oriented woman and in my opinion being in a long-term relationship may be a problem for her long-term goals. I think she got scared we got so serious so young..... ...Well, she got back August 7th, and noticed she had taken the promise ring off. She didn't want to wear it while we were on break, and "lead me on" and give me a "false sense of hope." She basically said the same thing on why she wanted a break and that she wasn't sure if she was in/out love with me or not. She said she wanted to continue the break until October 2nd, after she gets done taking the LSAT. (From reading this board, it seems that it is a good thing to get a definite date for ending a "break".) She said she also wanted to get a true sense of her feelings for me back in Baton Rouge, LA (Smaller Town, USA) instead of in NYC where obviously there is so much more to do. She honestly doesn't know what her decision is going to be Oct. 2nd. My question is this... Do you think I am getting a raw deal in having to be in this state of limbo until October? It will have been 4 months we would have been in a break? I don't know if I can handle being in this emotional state right before my last semester of school starts and right before I am beginning my job search.... or ....... is it a good thing that she gave me a definite period of time for this break? To me, it's kind of odd that she set a date for after her taking the LSAT. Does she expect to have a switch that says "I like him or I don't like him?" It's weird to me that she has a definite date of when she'll let me know if she wants to continue this relationship or not. The thing is...I have been down this road before with a previous relationship. Not exactly the same road, but I had the chance of beginning the healing process earlier than later, and it ended up being a bad breakup. Also...I am not sure how to act during this "break period." She says she wants to be friends. I want to talk to her badly...but I know that's just putting myself in a bad position from previous experience. What is a right combination of no-contact and being friends. I ultimately do want to be back with her, but I am pretty sure the chances are against me. Right now, I am kind of lost on what to do, how to interact with her. The crappy part is basically all of my support system will be away. Just about all my friends are either, away for college, already graduated from college, if they went to college with me, or off working in another city hours away. It's killing me for some reason that she'll be in the sorority house with all of her friends. LoL...and my apartment is no help...my roomate will be with his 24/7 shacker girlfriend. Right now everything is ok, but once summer is over...BLEH.