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Phoenix Down

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About Phoenix Down

  • Birthday 03/31/1979

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  1. well, sounds like a dead end. too bad. she was one in too long to get through walls... but there will always be another i assume. no way to stop the games huh? sux. i'd step up, but burnt out.
  2. i'm lost, met a girl, hit it off, alittle odd, but she was cute, didn't want anything serious. things started to grow, but then also fell apart. both started playn games. drifted. there was a time where she chased me, then i chased her. tried to meet a few times, said ok, but never showed, said bump it, so i did the same...got too weird. alwas had an excuse. she has a drinking problem which i assumed had something to do with it. as for me, i have a touching problem, as in touching other girls while i'm seeing one, but was kinda hope'n we could help one another...the last time we tried to meet, she stood me up again, so i said no when she tried again, she said she wnated to tell me something, so like a fool, agreed, sent a text when i got home, didn't hear anything back. so shut the door a final time. woulden't you know it, next day she comes back with "please don't hate me, grandfather died had to fly to london". didn't want to be a dushe (sp?) but i was done, said sorry about the news... she starts say'n she wants me, so on. i asked what she wanted from me, and what will the excuse be this time. said no excuse, wants just me. blah blah. (not try'n to be cold, just burnt out) i write music, did asong about us, if ya wanna hear it, go to link removed it's called "kath". after all the crap, it just came out. 3rd party says were just play'n games, i blew her off, she blew me off, give and take. after the song, and all the BS. should i care, try to do something, or let it be. i sent her a text about the song, told her it was kinda messed up. made me re-think if meeting up was really worth it. she replied with "really don't know right now" * * *? siad she'd listen to it. haven't herd from her since. 3rd party-friend and i talk still, she's the gossip type so i don't know how to take what she says. claims i care about the girl more than i admit, which is true to a point. when i met kat, didn't want a relationship, but the way she touched my face when she thought i was asleep knocked down walls i had built. fet invaded. she made me feel great, truly, but i fear games got in the way. i know this is long, i'm sorry, i live in a small town so wanted an outsiders advice. if you listen to the song, let me know how you think she may have taken it. tried to be light hearted about the song when i told her i posted it. said it made me horny, which is true, but i'm partly sadistic. thats me being playful so she didn't think i was just being a jerk. music is my diary. hard to control what goes in, have to be honest to me, but when i wrote the song, i was pretty fed up.
  3. Hey, Well, we're talking again like people, She decided she's not happy with her dude. I want it to go slow, she agrees. I siad I'd update, sorry it took so long. Other than that good luck every one, any advice or bumps in the road to look out for? We're both afraid still. Wish us luck. Phoenix
  4. I just wish I knew what to do. My brother and I cannot fight her demons she has to. But we can be there when she needs us. She's just become hateful twards me. She even blames it on me from time to time. (I know better than to believe that) but it still sucks to hear it.
  5. Apparently if you want you ex or in this case ex's to call you ask God to pull you family apart and they will come call'n. (please dont do that, it was a figure of speach) My dad closed the book on us (family) and took off with his new chick which is cool I guess, they weren't happy at all (mom and dad) But yeah, I must have some underground a cult watching over me reporting every little messed up thing to the people I dont need sympathy from. This year has been by far the most $%#tty. But seeing as how I found out the same day as they called to check on me is driving me crazy. Bad news travel too fast for me. (I know this sounds crazy but I'm fine with everything, my dad told my brother and I a few months ago what he was doing.) I coulden't say anything, but like I said, they both wern't happy. We are having to take care of my mom tho, she's a wreck. Any time I try to give advice she tells me I don't have the experence and I'm too young to help. I'm still going to try tho, she's my mom. But it's almost like trying to pull someone from a fire while there stabbing you over and over again. Any tips from people who have recovered from devorces? Hepl right about now would be nice. Thanks Phoenix
  6. Glad to hear it works. Keep up the good work, and good luck, toss me some if you get a chance.
  7. I'd have to say your convo was much more personal than mine. I did most of the talking, all she said was "I miss you 2". But Nothing more, she thought I was jealous of her b/f which is the ex b-4 me, but if you knew this guy...nope. I did say I hope he makes her happy b/c she deserves it. She does, like I said our timing was off. To give you an idea I'll give you a link to a site with some of my music on it, the song "suitable abuse" was one I did for her when we first met. I was still in love with someone else and was heart broken. I told her it wasn't a good time, but she insisted to lick my wounds, so I let her, but you'll tell from the song how I felt at that time. Any way too much time went on with her minding my wing and me flying off that I 4-got how much she was to me. Hell, I didn't even give her all of me. But once it was too late twards the end, I knew I was loosing her and it was too late so insecurity out of nowhere finnished us off. The song I did the day after was called "Deepest Apologies" (it's not on the site, but if you want to hear it I can email it to you. ) It was too late, I think the fact she saw me stumble over her the way I did the other blew up her head. I was in a rut. Any move I made would push her away, so I did no contact. She'd call atleast once a week about pointless things, but that just made things worse. That went on for 6 months and I broke down to tell her how I felt just n-case she missed me, but when I called a friend to get her number she said she'z started to see her ex again. All one big mess, I'm sure you see now why it's hard for me to try anymore. I'd love she show her what I ment, But I'm not even sure who she is anymore. So "Burning Bridges" for me and every one on e-notalone is whats helped me through this. (It's on the site) Well, as for you, I'd stay away for a while, she left, let her come back. If she knows your wait'n around, she'll take her time which allows her to 4-get you. Make her wonder, but no games. The site with the music is... link removed go to search and then to artist name and type in Deja Juniper and it should bring everything up. I hope my story can be of some help, and I'd like to hear what you think if you have time. Thanks Deja
  8. She's such a good person, I hope she finds herself and someone who makes her happy. I had the chance but the time'n was very wrong. But oh well, life is a lesson, just make sure you learn.
  9. Yeah but when she said that it was the same night I poured my heart out to her. After she said that I even said stop by when ever, (she somehow found out where I live), still nothing. Plus I'm not even sure what the hell i want anymore. To be single for a while for sure.
  10. Well, I guess I dont really know, but she was a good person, I only hope for her sake she finds her place in life and finds happiness. When I think of her now all I see is this little girl trying so hard to "dig herself out of a hole". Needless to say the hole will only get deeper and deeper n-till she finds other means. Thanks man, try and talk to your girl and see if you can help her punch through this mindset. Everyone should be "who they are", not what others expect. This world gets more and more crazy with every day that passes.
  11. The girl made it sound like it was deeper than just clothing and whats on the surface, thats all I've noticed, I haven't really hung around her to understand quite what she means. She's very smart tho, not sure you can fake that. I don't know what to tell her then. Every ones got their way I guess. She's just young I think and hasn't found her place yet. That would be my guess, is there no condition for this? Oh, and yes the sex was some of the best, still alittle shy on somethings, but I'm sure she'll learn more. I almost hate to say it, but I am a guy, it'd be fun to maybe meet up with her 4 or 5 years down the road to see what she's learned. Thanks
  12. Thats it, I'm getting a rock garden. j/j, thats a great way to put things into light. I love the window in which you view the wrold of relationships. I've weeded the garden and I'm ready to put in a coy pond and some fish for a change. I'm just not sure on what I want to grow yet. But be sure that the weeds will be removed on sight when I catch them trying to grow. We cant save every flower in the garden but we can always grow more which took me a while to understand. Keep up the open mind and I'd love to hear more. Phoenix
  13. Lets say I met this girl who was all into country and even had a nick name "Dixie", then one day after we dated for a while she transformed into someone who loves everything I do, like she droped the whole country thing and went all asian and european as far as clothing and intrests (where I'm from, and lifestyle). Then after a while we split up and she becomes some one completely different aggain, like she's a shape shifter for who ever she's around. What is this called? If theres even a name. It's like the person in qustion molds to her enviorment. Is this an insecurity issue or just not knowing what she wants? It makes it hard to judge who she is. (yes I'm speaking of the ex) I'm just trying to understand, it's helped to get over her b/c it's like the girl I fell in love with at one time is dead. It's hard to miss what was never there if you get me. I saw her best friend at the store last night and I asked how everything was going, she said she's not sure, it's like my ex is a completely different person and woulden't you know it, she blames me. (the ex, not her friend) I took a human beheavor corse a while ago and her friend asked if I'd ever herd of it. All I can think of is she's still young and doesn't know who she is yet, but she says it's deeper than that. (now I'm kinda glad I got away, but is there a condition for this or is it she's just young? I have no clue, but I told her I'd look into it. Any ideas? Thanks
  14. Take all the time you need, dude should understand. If not, tell him you need time to lick your wounds. How does your ex feel? Do you want him back?
  15. " i quickly hung up and said "what the hell am i doing" and shut the cellphone off for the rest of the night." Best move you could ever make. And if the ex does have another person over, thats up to her, not us. Keep that in mind. Go out, be you and have fun! Trust me, wasting time on hurting your self makes things worse, I know it's hard man but get out, go to Walmart if you have to just don't sit at home while the sclience crushes all your dreams. Make them happen. (Start by not going by her house) I had a chance to see where my ex lived and I chose not to know for the very reason. We live on the same road, that was hell enough. I have a feeling she's going to try for me again, but I also get the feeling it's going to be too late, b/c of how she is now, or where I may be. (Happy with someone else) Look out for you now, you might not know it, but you need you to be there for you. I know it sounds crazy but one day you'll look back and say, that dude from the internet with the crazy ex was right! Take care. Be safe and stay away from the ex, trust me. (N-less she calls and says, "hey, I want you now, in that case I'll direct traffic for you man, just let me know where and when! Good luck. Phoenix
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