how do they find me on facebook????

Hey all,

So I'm getting a little creeped out. I do online dating on POF, and two men have found me on facebook! I did not tell these men where I work, I did not give them my last name, the one has my phone number but the other doesn't, they do not have my e-mail address. How do they find me on facebook??? It gets me a little concerned because if they have my last name they can find me in the phonebook and then find my address, I mean there's only like three people in the phonebook with my last name. Plus my facebook I have listed where I work. Do they find me because I tell them the town I live in and then they look up all the people in my town with my first name? Like how do they find me?? I'm going to take out my name in search results on facebook, and tighten my security/privacy settings.

Why don't you politely ask each of them how they found you? Don't do it in an accusatory manner or you might not get an honest answer.

Perhaps they searched your first name and town, and then found your FB profile by comparing your profile picture(s) to your POF pictures. Perhaps your privacy settings weren't as private as you thought, and hopefully you'll change that.

That's why I'm unsearchable on FB! I have a unique first name; so all it would take is a first name and city search... boom they'd have my last name, and anything else I've made public.

do you have any pictures on your POF profile as you do on Facebook?

if so, i just learned of a "trick" that you can do on google with images. if you right click someone's picture on any online dating site, select "copy image location", then paste that link into a google images search, then click on "Search by Image" - the results can display other sites that have that same pic on them. I just tested this on myself on one of the pics I used on OKC. The result, pulled up another website where I used the same picture. I have that same pic on my Facebook profile but it's temporarily disabled so it didn't show the link on FB.

Other than that, I am not sure what else.

Maybe they searched you by first name on Linked In. Are you on there? If so, do you use the same pics there and on FB?

Before I disabled my FB profile, I made the privacy settings as strict as I could. You couldn't even search from me on there. Could be a good idea.

Have you used your POF handle on any other sites?

Btw, you can do a google search on a phone #. Sometimes you can find who it belongs to. For example, when I dated my ex, I googled her cell # and it pulled up a pdf that had list of contact info with her name/number. It was a contact sheet for members on her swim team that was posted online.

Hope that helps.

OMG maybe this is it! My POF proifle picture is the same as my FB profile picture. Wow I didn't know you can do that!!!

Or myabe he found me by looking up my first name and town.

Either way, I'm making some privacy changes on facebook, going to take my name out of search results!! I don't want to confront the guys, I don't want to engage with them....

Thanks everyone!

They probably looked up all the people with your first name from your town. If they're really into you, or just desperate for a date in general, I can totally see them doing that.

Some of these guys really have their tricks! One guy that was cyberstalking me from there last week (long story) created a new account to talk to me on facebook after I'd blocked him on the first one, and it somehow said I added him on the new one even though I didn't accept anything! Then, when I blocked him on the second one he found the other account I almost never use and sent me a request on there too!

They could have searched your first name + your town, or your first name + the school you graduated from, or searched your image through Google Images. It's pretty easy to find people on FB with very little information. Don't ever use your last name on Facebook, or where you work, or your city. No one needs to know this information about you. Use your first name + your middle name, for your work put something generic like "Law Firm", and leave your city out of it altogether.

this is creepy, i don't have facebook so i don't know how it works, i'm geussing the only way you know they found you is by searching and then messaging you right? can you see that they searched you even if they don't message you? sorry, maybe a dumb question, i just don't have FB

Maybe you can not put an identifiable pic up

wait dd you go on dates with these guys? please tell me you did or else it is even creepier!

this is creepy, i don't have facebook so i don't know how it works, i'm geussing the only way you know they found you is by searching and then messaging you right? can you see that they searched you even if they don't message you? sorry, maybe a dumb question, i just don't have FB

 

Maybe you can not put an identifiable pic up

No, it doen't show when someone searched for you on FB.

It is creepy how someone can find so much information about you with only a few personal details. I even proved to a friend that I could find out a lot of info about her, and she watched me as I managed to find out where she worked, lived, telephone number, FB page, plus I found a few forums she had posted on.. this was with just her name & the city she lived in! (I'm not a stalker haha but we got talking about safety issues like this & she wanted me to prove I could find all that info about her).

The google images thing is creepy too, a lot of people don't realise you can find someone's FB page just by searching an image you found on their dating profile. I must admit I didn't realise until some time back & that's when I took down my photos on the dating sites & now only send a photo if requested. It can help if you are suspicious of someone though, as I have become suspicious of a few guys & when I checked out their photos, they had obviously been copied - so always check if in doubt.

I never put where I work on any profiles or give out too many details. I try not to give out my surname if I can help it.

A good tip is if you want to be unsearchable via your images, then take some photos of yourself just for the dating site. Don't put them on FB etc and just use them for the dating site. Then if someone does try a google image search on you, they won't be given a link to your FB/other social networking sites.

I made a new email account just for online dating, and if a guy asks to email me, I give him that email account address. It's a disposable account and I don't have any ties to it, so if a guy does turn nasty, I can just delete the account and make a new one. Before I had been giving guys my personal email address & found that if a guy got a bit too obsessed, it was hard to delete him from my life. I don't add guys to my FB anymore (will admit I used to do this).

I just did a google image search on one of my photos on my FB page (not my main profile picture).. it didn't come up with my FB page link, so I think a link only comes up if the photo is your main profile picture.

Its not that hard to find people online to tell you the truth...there is so many different ways now a day to go searching for people. thats why people need to be very careful what they post or where they post because most things if not private or even sometimes private can be quickly searched...

there is a website i forget what its called..you can search the person name town and it comes up with a list of people then below it shows like 3 sites they are on and if you wanna know more about the person sign up for it..but i searched my name and it was pretty close..it showed my old myspace but facebook no because mine is pretty private..but all they info was right on besides the fact they said i have 3 brothers but i actually only have 2...everything else was pretty accurate.

That's pretty scary. I do agree it's pretty easy to find out info about people using just a name and town/city. I always advise people to keep social networking pages private - I have my FB on the most private settings, so only people who are friends of friends can add me, and no one can message me unless they're a friend. Also I advise people not to use the same usernames on every forum they visit, as it's so easy to google a username & find the other forums they've posted on (and not realised they've posted private info under these usernames). I sound so safety conscious haha but I have learnt from mistakes.

link removed here is one of the sites..its actually creeping me out now..it has google street view of my house..my parents name age..how much the cost of the house is..my brothers names...and some other info

link removed here is one of the sites..its actually creeping me out now..it has google street view of my house..my parents name age..how much the cost of the house is..my brothers names...and some other info

Is it just US based?

oh your from london...didnt see that...i think it is for the google part..but other stuff im not sure..but there is other sites i know of that arent just for US..just cant think of the names right now

Wow thanks everyone for all the info. With one guy I only went on one date, the other one I never met! So I tightened my security settings, like making my job info on Facebook private, also taking my name out of search results. I also might have to replace my last name with my middle name. It really is scary how much info they can find out there, we all need to be careful. Thanks everyone for the tips!

Oh my, I just paid subscription to spokeo and found out I have some pictures available. One picture from myspace, and when I tried to logon Myspace, my account doesn't even exist anymore! How can I remove those pictures online?

Also, when I entered my phone number, my complete address shows! This is scary. How can I hide my address so it won't be accessible to everyone with internet access!

How reliable is spokeo? I just did a search on an email address that I use for emailing a couple of online friends (nothing else whatsoever) & apparently spokeo have come up with over 80 hits with my email.. but I think they search for the main body of the email address (everything before the @ sign).

Oh my, I just paid subscription to spokeo and found out I have some pictures available. One picture from myspace, and when I tried to logon Myspace, my account doesn't even exist anymore! How can I remove those pictures online?

Also, when I entered my phone number, my complete address shows! This is scary. How can I hide my address so it won't be accessible to everyone with internet access!

I am unsure how to do the above but have you considered buying a cheap SIM card and just using that for dating etc (I don't know if you're actively dating but if you get the gist).

How reliable is spokeo? I just did a search on an email address that I use for emailing a couple of online friends (nothing else whatsoever) & apparently spokeo have come up with over 80 hits with my email.. but I think they search for the main body of the email address (everything before the @ sign).

its pretty much on point..i only thing i said before they usually screw up on that ive seen is family members... also they have my middle name..i dunno how they got my middle name because i never use my middle name for anything except like school related things.

I think you are wrong about them being creepy.....it's Facebook who is creepy.

This has happened to me twice also.

Only one had your number....but did you have both of theirs?

Did you know FB syncs your contacts to your account? You most likely showed up in the "people you might know" section and that's how they "found" you.

On your phone open the FB app, click the three lines for settings, scroll almost all the way down, app settings, disable autosync

For good measure go to your phone settings, apps, and turn off some permissions for FB and messenger

Go on your computer and open your FB page, find friends, and next to the "friends request / people you may know" section there is a "add personal contacts" section. Click manage imported contacts and delete some or all.

It will notify you it deleted them but will actually takes a few minutes.

I checked back right away and deleted them a second time, then screamed at swore at FB, looked something else up, checked back and they were gone