A really bad situation...need advice !

[cordelia]

I've been a manager with the same company for 4 years now, and been working there for a total of 9 years. In the past year I have not been giving my full effort and I've been really unhappy working there. I had one review a year ago which was really bad, and then another one a few months later that was a lot better. At that time I was scared of losing my job so I did everything I could to improve my performance.

So now here I am a year later, and I've been so unmotivated by the job that I've been doing really badly. My review is coming up again any day now, and I've heard from a couple of people in the office that there's been some really negative feedback about my performance ! I've been so scared and stressed out about this for the past week, I don't know what to do. I thought about handing in my resignation, although I think that would be pretty obvious to people why I am quitting ! especially if I don't even have another job lined up yet.

 

I've been a nervous wreck for days now, and feel completely paranoid that any day now I'm going to get fired or demoted ! I'm so confused, I don't know what to do ! Getting fired would be completely humiliating, how the hell do I get out of this ?? Has anyone out there been in this situation before ?

 

Any advice out there would be appreciated !

[annie24]

you said you are unhappy in your job, maybe it is time for you to start looking for something new? this could be a blessing in disguise. What you could do is submit your letter of resignation now, so that you won't be fired?

[anggrace]

I agree. If you are completely unmotivated at your job, mabey its time for a new one. What is it specifically that you don't like about your job? Keep that in mind when looking for a new one.

[nilli]

A couple of months ago I could seriously have written a lot of what you said in your post.

 

I felt it was not worth all the stress and anxiety over a job I had lost interest in so I quit without having another one lined up - after a hell of a lot of worrying about it. I too thought it would be embarrassing that everyone would know the reason as I too had been taked about, I also had a decent salary and a permanent contract. I figured I could probably get by for 3-4 months if need be. The minute I handed my resignation in (actually, from when I decided in my heart) I felt so much better and I truly haven't regretted it once.

 

I asked myself if it was possible to retrieve the situation and I honestly didn't really want to try anymore, possible or not.

 

I'm teaching english as a foreign language right now and although the money is bad, contract non-existant and hours are unreliable, I'm still happy I left.

[BeStrongBeHappy]

It really sounds like it is long past when you should have looked for a new job, and need to make that your first priority. i had a job that i loved for years and years, then the company changed and got new leadership and it turned from being a great job to a terrible place to work. no matter how well you worked, they wanted more, long hours, no raises, etc. so everyone got de-motivated and eventually lost interest, with layoffs following next. it's a very common cycle in business these days, especially in industries where they want to outsource the work and get rid of long term (but more expensive) employees.

 

my only regret is i should have left much sooner than i did... i finally quit when they had laid off about half the people and they'd nearly worked the remainder to death. but you can get in this mindset where you just slog along becuase it USED to be a good job, with some hopes that it will become one again, which it almost never does...

 

so if you have been unhappy and unmotivated (other than fear of losing your job) for the last year or two, it is really time to put ALL your energies into finding a new job. it is far better to have quit a job than to get fired, better and less explanation to future employers. lots of times companies will warn you first in a bad review and put you on probation, but even if you don't get probation, you know what the answer is, you need to move on.

 

if they should come out during the review and say they want to fire you, then immediately try to negotiate a resignation instead. you won't get unemployment if you resign, but you will not have the firing on your record. but if you need the money, then let them fire you and take it...

 

the other thing is to quit worrying about what they will say in the review. you already know things are not going well, and probably have thought everything already that they will say about you, so you are just blowing up an event that will be unpleasant (like going to the dentist), but take less than an hour... so just look at it this way, that its a bit of a spanking, but you know it is also a wake up call to get yourself in gear and get out and into a job where you are interested in doing well and performing.

 

if the review is really bad, keep in mind that those reviews are not shared outside the company, so if you leave the company, you have a clean slate to start again elsehwere. most companies nowadays when called to verify employment will only state the dates you were employed there, and what your salary was, whether you resigned or were fired. there are too many legal hurdles for them should they say something bad about you and you not get a job because of it, so they usually just say the minimal facts. just make sure you have 3 good references from people you trust who will say good things about you, doesn't have to be your former boss who gave the negative reviews. everyone has bosses they didn't get along with for one reason or another, which is why lots of people look for new work, and everyone knows that.

 

so whether you get fired or not, it is obvious you need to hit the road and find something that does motivate you. far better than standing around waiting for the axe to fall... actually at the company i worked at where everyone was miserable, they were HOPING the axe would fall to put them out of their misery, but really, you are far better at doing that, the misery can stop any time, just by getting out and getting a new job!

 

just look at it this way, you are about to end a bad era and start a new one that has potential to make you happy. inertia can keep you in a bad situation, but hovering around there obviously isn't good for you, so time to find somewhere that is!

[cordelia]

Its really helpful to hear from someone who has been in the same situation. I wrote up a letter of resignation a few days ago and I've debating whether to hand it in. This would be a really big change for me...but I've been so unhappy and I don't see the situation getting any better. I've even been tempted to hand in the letter without giving any notice, but that would be disprespectful to the company. I've sent out a few resumes already, and financially I would be able to get by for 2 months maximum...

[annie24]

Yeah, I think it's better to resign than to get fired.

 

While you are looking for a real job, could you take a part time retail job to tide you over?