Hopelessinidaho Posted March 31, 2007 Share Posted March 31, 2007 Got a question for the group to try and figure out how I feel about something. My live in girl friend that I have been with for about 3 years is getting off on a toy while im at work. My issues are if I confront her she will deny it Im positive shes doing it. Our sex life has droped a bit on her part. Shes the very jelous type. If I did partake in self enjoyment I would be in big trouble. So how should i feel about this? Link to comment
Locke2121 Posted March 31, 2007 Share Posted March 31, 2007 Why would you be in trouble??? Come on, everyone, well lends themselves a helping hand every once in a while! As for the girlfriend using a toy...nothing wrong with that, but the sex life is dropping, it could mean its getting a bit stale. Maybe you need to refine your technique a bit..here, link removed place has some GREAT tips for increasing your sexual prowess. Link to comment
Hopelessinidaho Posted March 31, 2007 Author Share Posted March 31, 2007 Thanks for your comment Locke2121 She still to this day gives me a bad time for the one or two times I did get off alone when we was broke up for a few months. As for using the toy it does turn me on a bit but make me wonder if im being replaced? There are other issues at hand but one is my problem only being able to come once. I used to be able to get her off first with my hand and oral but now she pushes them away and want to go right to busness I last about 20 to 30 minutes but I feel ist not enough and shes not getting what she wants. I try my best to please her first but dont work out that way. Link to comment
willow2900 Posted March 31, 2007 Share Posted March 31, 2007 You two need to talk. There's a reason she isn't allowing oral sex anymore. Do you know why? Does she? I think you both need to talk openly about your sex life. After 3 years I think you should be able to do this. There is something going on and unless you both open the doors of communication and discuss it it's just going to get worse. Link to comment
cantexplain Posted March 31, 2007 Share Posted March 31, 2007 I don't think this out of line so much - except it is something you two can't talk about. If she is losing interest or she is unfulfilled in some way this will certainly take talking to ferret out. But it doesn't sound like that, at least not yet - sounds like she just wants you to go "down to business" - this is what she likes. But you have your own needs, too. The big thing that stands out is she thinkss it is a sign of something wrong and here she is now doing it. This means something to me. I do not think masturbation necessarily means anything wrong about you, her, OR the relationship. Its the talking thing that is the next step, yes. My expectation is masturbation within a relationship between two sexually-active people can be pretty common. I don't think two people's sexual needs are exactly and always matched - and timed. Be glad she is not wearing you out too much! On the flipside, talk with her and take these pointers above to get all you need in this relationship, I say. There could be some great opportunities here! And maybe you guys are at this point in a relationship where this needs to be talked about. Sometimes situations don't present themselves until you are ready. It might just be your next big step. Link to comment
Hopelessinidaho Posted March 31, 2007 Author Share Posted March 31, 2007 Thank you Cantexplain. The problem with talking is she gets on the offencive and gets upset and will deny every thing. I personaly dont see a problem with her getting off now and then as long as it dont replace me. The site Locke2121 you suggested is great! thanks! I do have one bigger problem to pose to the group is ..... Being the one shot wonder. I have yet to see a sugestion or anything to help over come this problem. With me when it comes to sex I think like a man in this sense I do my best to get her to cum as much as she wants first "so I try" but once I come I did what I was here to do my feelings shut down and very rarely can go again is there a fix for this or suggestion? Link to comment
monkey1 Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 how do you know she's using a toy? she leave it lying out? what if you come on to her and maybe ask if you can use it on her? who initiates sex now? Link to comment
Locke2121 Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 Batteries all dead?? Sorry, really bad joke, I apologize. But I'm sure that if it turns him on, he has seen her use it a time or two. And your right, it can be very sexy watching a women get herself off...informative too! You can watch and see where she likes to be touched and stimulated. If I may suggest, study the section on G-Spot stimulation. When done right, it'll leave any toy on the floor covered in dust! Link to comment
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