stefanied26 Posted March 18, 2007 Share Posted March 18, 2007 it would help your cause for sure! trust me im there right now! being clear is the best methood, it usually gets you clear results Link to comment
lovesickkk Posted March 18, 2007 Author Share Posted March 18, 2007 UPDATE: Hey guys, Well I did end up going to happy hour with her. It was her friend, me and her. We had decent convo. I was just teasin her alot, since she had to get up like every 10 mins to use this restroom, so I was making fun of her small bladder, and just dumb stuff....etc.... My cousin joined us later, so i had to sit next to her, and I was like " I dont want to sit next to you, you smell!" hahha...and that was when she hit me. I knew she had been feeling sad and depressed, so when her fren and my cousin were in a conversation, I made eye contact with her and asked " So how are you feeling? are you ok?"....and we just caught eye contact and she was like, "yeahh, i'm okay"...its prob my mind playing tricks on me, but I felt some kind of attachment the way she looked back and answered. I then made fun of her and was like "don't you got a curfew? your boyfriend will get mad at you." and she was like, "No, he's not like that, but i wish sometimes he would you know, show he cares..." and i just said sounds good, lets drink to that...and we all cheers and drank. I think her body language was good, her legs were crossed with her foot pointing towards me....i dont know how much that means. I paid the tab for everyone, even when she said that she was going to pay. And I told her with a smile, "well since, you are hitten me up for drinks, its only right I pay." On the way out, I asked her if she wanted me to walk her to her car, but she was like, "No, it's okay, I'm fine." I'm retarded. I should have just walked her to her car instead of asked her!. Doh! Besides it was weird with her guy friend there also......But yeah when I got home, we both got online, and she was like, "I missed laughing like that,..... good friends, good company, good times!"....I was just like yeah, it was good to see ya again. Anyways, when her b-day came up, I sent her an e-card that said "Happy birthday Grandma!" Our inside joke is that she is a grandma cuz she doesn't party as much as she used too..etc. She just e-mailed me back a very simple response and said, "haha i opened it and at first i was like grandma??!?, but then i got it dork. Thanks for the wishes =)" I've been pretty busy lately, and also somewhat tryin to avoid her so that she can think/wonder/miss me, I dont want to be so seemingly available...we'll see how it goes.... also, she does have a boyfriend, so we'll see what happenes still....=T And whats weird is she is throwing a bachelorette party for her fren next weekend at a club, and invited me to go over the phone....and i was like, "uhh, aint it going to be all girls?" and she was like "yes, but you can bring your friends, and it will be boys and girls." Does this mean anything guys? I don't even know any of the girls at the bachelorette party except for her. So I'm thinking she wants to hang out? I'm thinking this is a good thing, cuz her boyfriend almost certainly won't be there, maybe this is my chance to show her more, spend time with her.... I also think that telling her straight up is out of the question unless I hang out with her a few more times, and show her more of what kind of person I am, etc.... I dont think she will leave her bf without me showing her enough of what I can offer! Link to comment
Locke2121 Posted March 18, 2007 Share Posted March 18, 2007 Hello FRIEND! Cause I'm afraid thats what you are! You worried about her problems, talked nice and helped her whenever she needed it. BUT ALL IS NOT LOST! If you want to be more than a friend...its time to go into MAN MODE! By that I mean to need to back off from the role of the concerned friend, and start slipping in a few moves, hints and suggestions. Start flirting with her in a more serious manner, ask her out to dinner, just the TWO OF YOU. Or set back, help her through her problems and watch while she gets a new boyfriend. Link to comment
MrMilk Posted March 18, 2007 Share Posted March 18, 2007 Hey man. Two things you need to realise: 1. She has a BOYFRIEND. You are her FRIEND. If she truly liked you at all, she would be with you and not him. 2. She definitely has issues, but don't kid yourself that she would have valid reasons for staying with the bad boyfriend instead of being with you. No matter how rocky the relationship is or how flirty she is with you or in which direction she points her toes, she still goes home and HAS SEX WITH HER BOYFRIEND. Sorry mate I don't mean to seem blunt, but I've far too often been in your kinda situation and the best thing to learn is that when two people like each other it's obvious. If you need to start reading body language and the meaning of polite replies to dorky e-cards, then the mutual attraction isn't there. If you have the time to overanalyze things on an internet forum - instead of actually spending time with the object of your affection - I think that should tell you something. I really do hope something works out for you. You are a party promoter after all, so you should meet heaps of new and interesting people. Best of luck. Link to comment
lovesickkk Posted March 18, 2007 Author Share Posted March 18, 2007 If you want to be more than a friend...its time to go into MAN MODE! By that I mean to need to back off from the role of the concerned friend, and start slipping in a few moves, hints and suggestions. Start flirting with her in a more serious manner, ask her out to dinner, just the TWO OF YOU. Do you think it's kind of foul to ask a girl if she has a boyfriend already though? Link to comment
lovesickkk Posted March 18, 2007 Author Share Posted March 18, 2007 When two people have an interest in each other, it's not exactly that obvious. Thats why theres a forum for this topic in the first place. If it was so easy, no one would even be stressing about relationships. And about sticking with a bad boyfriend, I've met plent of girls who are stuck in a dead-end relationship, they just need to realize that they can do better. History and comfort is a big deal. Trust me, the types of things she says to me, etc, is not the type of thing you would say to somone if you had NO interest in them at all. You sound bitter dude. Link to comment
Locke2121 Posted March 18, 2007 Share Posted March 18, 2007 Do you think it's kind of foul to ask a girl if she has a boyfriend already though? If she is going to stay with him, then yes. But if you think that they will NOT remain an item, then you need to put her on notice that you are interested. So, do you think they will last? Honestly! Link to comment
lovesickkk Posted March 19, 2007 Author Share Posted March 19, 2007 Honestly, I don't think they will last, I mean he has cheated on her numerous times. My girl friends that I have confided to, told me that if I show her enough, she will leave him. It's just that she needs the security and has to be sure I would be worth it before she leaves him, because no one wants to be lonely. Who knows, I mean she did invite to an all-girls bachelorette.....which i think is kinda odd considering no guys are going and that I don't even know the bride-to-be. Myabe she wants to hang out and see what can happen from there....?? Link to comment
MrMilk Posted March 19, 2007 Share Posted March 19, 2007 When two people have an interest in each other, it's not exactly that obvious. Thats why theres a forum for this topic in the first place. If it was so easy, no one would even be stressing about relationships. And about sticking with a bad boyfriend, I've met plent of girls who are stuck in a dead-end relationship, they just need to realize that they can do better. History and comfort is a big deal. Trust me, the types of things she says to me, etc, is not the type of thing you would say to somone if you had NO interest in them at all. You sound bitter dude. Hey lovesickkk, Definitely flirting/dating etc. ain't easy. I should know! I shouldn't have put my point that way. I guess I've just been in situations where I've been stressing and overanalyzing, and in hindsight the answer has been staring me in the face. The answers have been both positive and negative. And I was just trying to deliver the "obvious" answer to you. I still stand by my advice that you should move on from her. I certainly don't know the specifics of your situation, but from what you say she MAY be in a bad relationship out of comfort/history (which I can certainly accept does happen), but at the same time she MAY also be in a rocky relationship and using you to make herself feel better during the bad times. Moreover, no matter how bad the relationship is she still has a boyfriend, which to me is always a massive "STAY AWAY". Be her friend, not a home-wrecker. It must be a tough tightrope to tread, but I definitely never go after a girl if she has a dude, it's just not on. And you seem like a good guy. I do honestly wish you the best of luck, but you seem like a cool guy who could meet any number of interesting, attractive, girls. I think you'll have a better time! Link to comment
ghost69 Posted March 20, 2007 Share Posted March 20, 2007 i meet a woman. woman has another man. i'm outtie. never is this situation good. Link to comment
lovesickkk Posted March 21, 2007 Author Share Posted March 21, 2007 another update: i called her to talk about some business stuff, but she didnt pick up. She then called me back, and we talked about that, and then as I was about to hang up she goes, "Heyy, are you going to come out this weekend?" (she is referring to the bachlorette party she is throwing for her friend at the club.) I was like, "well, isn't it going to be all guys?" and she was like, "well, yeahh, but you can bring some boys, and i'll bring the girls." and i didnt want to seem too available, so I told her, that I have a wedding to attend (which I do.), but that I would let her know what I do afterwards. I don't know if she is being friendly or what because this is the second time she has asked me to come out this particular weeeknd. I'm pretty sure her bf won't be there. Just wondering what you guys think? We also started talkin about random stuff, and I was tryin to crack some jokes here and there, which she seemed to warm up to. We ended up having a 30 min conversation. As much as I hate to admit it, when I got off the phone with her, I was pretty giddy...:splat: I guess time will tell what happens next...... Link to comment
Skylab Posted March 21, 2007 Share Posted March 21, 2007 If she truly liked you at all, she would be with you and not him. Amen! Your whole post was excellent, but that one line sums it up. Link to comment
Skylab Posted March 21, 2007 Share Posted March 21, 2007 i meet a woman. woman has another man. i'm outtie. never is this situation good. You are a hard man, ghost, but you're probably right. Link to comment
Skylab Posted March 21, 2007 Share Posted March 21, 2007 I guess time will tell what happens next...... She'll break up with her boyfriend and find herself another guy and it won't be you. You'll end up hurt. Forget about her and find someone who respects you and isn't as confused as she seems to be. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted March 21, 2007 Share Posted March 21, 2007 let me sum it up more. you meet a girl and she has a bf. you find out about it. what if she convinces you that she is leaving this guy for you? who is to say this won't happen to you later when she finds another guy? Link to comment
lovesickkk Posted March 21, 2007 Author Share Posted March 21, 2007 let me sum it up more. you meet a girl and she has a bf. you find out about it. what if she convinces you that she is leaving this guy for you? who is to say this won't happen to you later when she finds another guy? I wouldnt even want to get with her right after the break-up, then i would just be the rebound guy. I know i'm in it for the long haul, but i feel like i have some time to spare. And I dont think she would do that to me, because I wouldnt cheat on her numerous times! Link to comment
lovesickkk Posted March 21, 2007 Author Share Posted March 21, 2007 thanks for yall's opinions by the way! just trying to get other's perspectives! Link to comment
ghost69 Posted March 21, 2007 Share Posted March 21, 2007 definitely a good idea to wait. Link to comment
dcl222 Posted March 22, 2007 Share Posted March 22, 2007 Hey, Lovescik....I think your adorable. How many times... did you bump into this chick?? Well, I say it's fate! A couple of times I thought that you should of confided that you had an interest in her, but that you didn't act on it becasue you knew she had a b/f. I think you would of scored some major points with that! Anyways, there is definetly chemisty there between both of you so I say go for it! You seem to be great and mature, she seems to need a guy like you to put her in check! Teach that girl that no one deserves to be treated like crap. Good Luck in love...it's great! 1 Link to comment
lovesickkk Posted March 23, 2007 Author Share Posted March 23, 2007 Hey, Lovescik....I think your adorable. How many times... did you bump into this chick?? Well, I say it's fate! A couple of times I thought that you should of confided that you had an interest in her, but that you didn't act on it becasue you knew she had a b/f. I think you would of scored some major points with that! Anyways, there is definetly chemisty there between both of you so I say go for it! You seem to be great and mature, she seems to need a guy like you to put her in check! Teach that girl that no one deserves to be treated like crap. Good Luck in love...it's great! Thanks dcl222! She IM'd me today and we talked for about an hour, just random stuff.... I'm still debating whether or not to meet her up this weekend. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted March 23, 2007 Share Posted March 23, 2007 go meet up with her. see how it goes. then give us an update. Link to comment
lovesickkk Posted April 3, 2007 Author Share Posted April 3, 2007 Asked her to Happy hour for some drinks today. She said, " I would but I have to pick up my sister at the airport today, but how about tomorrow?" I told her, that sounds good!. Will keep you guys updated for anyone thats still following this! lol Link to comment
lovesickkk Posted April 3, 2007 Author Share Posted April 3, 2007 At what time should i call to confirm? I know she gets off of work at 5p.m..... Should I call around 4? Link to comment
Iceman26 Posted April 3, 2007 Share Posted April 3, 2007 Yeah 4 sounds good. If she doesn't answer leave a message. Link to comment
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