just so fed up...so angry..need help

[Little Penguin]

to calm me down...

 

I broke up with my ex bf because of his weed problems....two weeks later, he called me saying he will have a nose surgery this week...pre-op check up was this monday and surgery will be on Friday...He said he wanted me to go with him since he didn't really have any close friends here...So, I think I don't really have a choice but to go with him...

 

Monday, I lent him the car (his car is not good for long distance driving) but didn't really go....But Friday, I have to go....all these just triggered all my resentments against him..such as his selfish addictive personality,his lies,broken promise...It's always me who have been helping him out, supporting him...and he blames me for leaving him...some times I really hate him...I really don't want to go...I am so mad at myself for not being able to control my emotions...I have a big job interview tomorrow, but I just can't calm my anger to focus on the preparation...I really need some help here...

[chai714]

I think you should tell yourself, "I will worry about this after my job interview. For now, I will focus on what's coming up first, which is my interview. Afterwards, I'll deal with the ex but not until I'm done with my interview."

 

It's okay to delay worrying about something and in this case, it would be best that you do so that you can better focus.

 

If that doesn't work, go for a walk or run. Do something to put your mind elsewhere. Good luck.

[sidehop]

It sounds like your b/f needs a bit of growing up to do and you deserve much better. There's only so much a person can do to help another, the rest is up to the individual to fix that problem.

 

Why don't you go away for a bit, go do something you enjoy and put your emotions aside...or you can always use it to your benefit like running, working out, listening to music and get that anger out!

 

Good luck on the interview tomorrow! I'm sure you'll do just fine

[Little Penguin]

I am at work...can't go anywhere...I am listening to "five for fighting"'s songs....trying to focus on learning new software here...but I feel like I am trying to control my emotions so hard that I actually could feel muscle pain in my forhead...I am trying to tell myself that I am helping people, and I should not expect anything in return..He is just another person that i am helping...no big deal..I shall not care about whateve he thinks...grrrr

[sidehop]

How is he helping you? It sounds like you have a great heart but this is a person that's supposed to support you and give you back the same in return or at least show an appreciation. It doesn't sound like he's a bad person at all but he's not making good choices with his life.

 

A person like that is just not healthy in any relationship. Don't feel obligated to go either, he's not a 5-year old that can't take himself to the hospital either.

[Little Penguin]

i really don't remember if he ever helped me ...maybe I've never asked for help..but anyway..yeah...I am moving away from him...feel much better after typing all these things on here...His nose surgery is to cut off those pre-cancerous cells and it's gonna be 4 hours long...he is required to stay in the hospital for 23 hrs afterwards...I have to book a hotel nearby...see, isn't he supposed to take care my lodging needs? afterall, he is the one who dragged me there....He didn't even think about it....Now I am pissed off again..what a selfish bastard!..

[sidehop]

Wow book a hotel??? It must be pretty far...that's pretty bad if he has to get a surgery.

 

I think you've been building up these emotions and it's finally blowing up. After this is done & over you need to find your own happiness! There's nothing wrong in caring about him...but just don't go out of your way to help when he can help himself