what to do?

[HDD]

Hi Everyone,

 

So I have a question for you all. Since this is my first major break up, what do you do when you meet one of your ex's friends/colleagues? I mean, do you just say Hi and make lame conversation? I really have no intention of saying hello because i just want to get over him and if they provide me with any information about my ex that I dont want to know about, it will just set me back another bizilion days... you see, i havent really bumped into anyone he knows, i just see them around and i just get nervous because even though we were good friends (when i was with my ex), and I really dont want to be rude, i just have no intention of making any contact, at least not right now.

How can you just be polite and keep your cool? Or what should you do?

 

Advice please?

[renaissancewoman101]

If I were to run into one of my ex's friends, I would see if he/she said "hi" first and just have a small conversation (nothing about the ex) and then excuse myself.

 

This summer I ran into one of my ex's closest friends at Faire. He approached me first and said "hi" to me. We talked for a bit about our lives and then I told him "I had to go".

 

Quick and simple.

[dogheadma]

Avoid contact if you can by not being the one to initiate. If they do, then yes, make polite, meaningless, and brief small talk and gracefully excuse yourself.

[finewhine]

I guess it depends on how close you were with the person you run into. I run into my ex's friends ALL THE TIME (never my ex though, thank goodness). The first encounter made my heart race. The second one wasn't so bad. Now when this happens, I'm able to have a painless conversation, usually one that I enjoy.

 

Rest assured, none of my ex's friends have EVER talked about him with me. Likewise, I doubt this will happen with you. If they're close to your ex, they'll know you're broken up and unless they're complete insensitive clods, they'll not want to drudge up painful memories (or make awkward conversation).

 

Look them in the eye, say, "Hi! How've you been?" and take it from there. You'll be fine, I promise!!!