How can she doe this to me?

[NewlywedinMD]

How can the person who is my best friend, let alone my girlfriend and now my wife hurt me like she has? She has all but killed me, lied to my face. I feel like there is no reason to live. She is all I want.

 

I was given a new job oppurtunity, and took it on her advice since it will be moving me ot a new city and state. Now she doesn't even want to try to make this marriage work.

 

Hard for me to see her as teh same person that I married. Could she have played me for 6 years?

 

I wish I could die, and woudl so if I knew it wouldn't hurt my family and friends.

[sugar_coated_honey]

you need to find out exactly what is going on, is the reason your wife doesnt want to make the marriage work that she doesnt want to move?! sounds stupid but you never know, talk to her

 

and if the case is she really has been playing you for all this time, then you should make the fresh start at your new job placement and find someone that deserves you.

[justMe]

hi there,

 

I was told alot of times and did witness it myself.

 

"People change over time" and if you remain the same, you'll be the one to lose. You've to move on, she might never be the same lady you used to know, love, adore. You've a new job apportunity, you've somethings that allows you to start new.

 

You don't have to die for the reason someone you love changed. You've to live on and climb up in your life, to show her that she made the biggest mistake of leaving you. There has been alot of people out there who were in the same situation as you are. And i do believe there are who chose the path of suicide, and others who chose to path to live on, to be a better man.

 

Look at the two path. the one where they ended their life, got nothing out of it. the one which chose to learn from their mistakes, looks back at it and smile or laugh at how lucky they were.

 

take that job apportunity, move on in life. Easier said than done, but possible.

 

Good Luck,

 

justMe

[NewlywedinMD]

no, she encouraged me to take this new position. One that if things were going great I would dream about. I took it thinking it would give us a new chance. She lead me down the road. Saying how great it woudl be, how we could afford a great house, etc.

 

Basically I got played, as they say the nice guys finish last and I got busterd. She got the wedding she wanted and more now she is done with me

[avman]

Well lets start out by saying Divorce is the number two stressor in life. The only thing that is worse is the death of a spouse. Plus you've added moving and a new job to the mix. I think the most balanced person in the world would have a very tough time going through what you are going through.

 

You are going to feel like crap. There is no way around it. Its ok to feel like crap when you're going through this. I felt like crap when I went through something very similar. And I also felt like never waking up and not wanting to face each day. It took a year before I felt better. And I needed help from friends, doctors, counselors, lawyers, church, etc.

 

My point is you shouldn't go through this alone. Its way too hard. Find a divorce support group. There are many to choose from. And most will let you just sit in and not have to talk until you feel comfortable. Those are the people who most understand your feelings - after all they are going through it themselves. They also know many of the resources available to help you. If you do move to a new city then this would be a good way of starting to make some friends. The WORST thing you can do is lock yourself in the house and not come out.

 

Another suggestion is to get some good books. One that helped me was "How to heal a painful relationship". I can't remember the author but I'm sure Amazon has it.

 

And I'll pray for you that you may have a lighter burden in days to come.