Thomazz Posted February 11, 2009 Share Posted February 11, 2009 day 3 of my officially announced NC. ("please do not call or email, not even as friends") I'm still breathing but I do not feel alive.. damn I hate this * * * * . Wondering what she is thinking now. Link to comment
Ixtapa Posted February 11, 2009 Share Posted February 11, 2009 Today is hard again. Not in a great mood for other reasons and the situation with him doesn't help. I still can't deal with the fact that he didnt apologize (or even explain) his stupid behavior of the last couple weeks. He deleted me on Facebook and might have deleted me on MSN too...but in any case he forgot to "block" me so I can still see when he is online (like right now). I do not wish to block him as I would like to give him the opportunity to contact me on MSN at a later date if he wishes too (not NOW though). So should I delete him on MSN for the time being so I won't see when he is online ? Mmmh...I think I just answered to my own question....I will delete him for the next 28 days and see how I feel at the end of this challenge Link to comment
brazilgirl21 Posted February 11, 2009 Share Posted February 11, 2009 Starting Day 9. These past two nights have been kind of hard because I spend at least 1-2 hours thinking about him and what can/could have beem. I wanted to go out tonight, but sleeping late because of my thoughts made me tired and not as energetic. Oh well, Day 10 tomorrow, 1/3 of the challenge!! I wonder if he's thinking about me. Link to comment
BrokenheartUK Posted February 11, 2009 Share Posted February 11, 2009 So should I delete him on MSN for the time being so I won't see when he is online ? I'd say definitely yes. You'll only sit there wondering who he's talking to when you see he's online and will be tempted to 'pop up' and say hi (I know, I've done it myself). Believe me, cutting yourself off from any chance of running into your ex online - be it on msn, facebook, myspace, whatever, is the best thing you can do. It hurts, but it's nothing compared to the pain of seeing or hearing stuff you'd rather not about them! Nice to that BrokenheartUK. She must be confused and worried how you are continuing your NC. It is for your good. Keep going and be strong. Hahaha, I can categorically say that I bet she is 100% relieved! I doubt she's given me a second thought since I've gone NC, she has other people to think of now. Thank you for the encouraging words though. Day 9 - feel awful today, not much sleep. Just been to the doctor's and he prescribed me Temazepam for my insomnia NC is still okay, but it does make me think about her more than ever. Link to comment
Ixtapa Posted February 11, 2009 Share Posted February 11, 2009 I'd say definitely yes. You'll only sit there wondering who he's talking to when you see he's online and will be tempted to 'pop up' and say hi (I know, I've done it myself). Believe me, cutting yourself off from any chance of running into your ex online - be it on msn, facebook, myspace, whatever, is the best thing you can do. It hurts, but it's nothing compared to the pain of seeing or hearing stuff you'd rather not about them! That's what I thought. At the moment, I have no desire to contact him AT ALL. I am angry at him still and do not want to give him the pleasure of showing him that I am "weak" Still...I might get weak later on and feel like contacting him again. So yes, he is gone .....for the next 4 weeks at least... Link to comment
brazilgirl21 Posted February 11, 2009 Share Posted February 11, 2009 Brokenheart - I am having horrible insomnia as well!! It's like I think about this situation for at least 2 hours before falling asleep! It's horrible because I have work, class, and trying to go out and have a social life but I can't get enough sleep!!! I'm also on Day 9!! Let's think on the bright side, 1/3 of our challenge tomorrow! Link to comment
BrokenheartUK Posted February 11, 2009 Share Posted February 11, 2009 Brokenheart - I am having horrible insomnia as well!! It's like I think about this situation for at least 2 hours before falling asleep! It's horrible because I have work, class, and trying to go out and have a social life but I can't get enough sleep!!! I'm also on Day 9!! Let's think on the bright side, 1/3 of our challenge tomorrow! It's awful, isn't it? I haven't slept right through for two weeks now, the weekends are the worst because as soon as I wake up I think about my ex and her new bf snoozing away together like we used to. I definitely can't get back to sleep after thinking that! I'm exhausted pretty much all the time which you think would make me sleep more, but it's actually gotten to the stage where I dread going to bed. Stay strong brazilgirl, we can do it Incidentally, why are you putting a time limit on your NC? I'm just doing mine for as long as possible. The only time I can conceive it will be broken will be my birthday on March 7th if she bothers to get in touch. Otherwise, I'll just keep going until I am healed... Link to comment
brazilgirl21 Posted February 11, 2009 Share Posted February 11, 2009 I'm putting a time-limit so I can feel accomplished on the 30th. And I'm going to see how I feel and how to proceed when I get there. I might attempt contact, some people advised me to do so in my thread. Link to comment
BrokenheartUK Posted February 11, 2009 Share Posted February 11, 2009 Well I hope it goes well for you whatever the outcome. The one thing I've learned about NC is that it makes you stronger each day, which brings me a lot of comfort in my weakest moments. I still have them a lot Link to comment
JohnGalt Posted February 11, 2009 Share Posted February 11, 2009 I really think superdave should amend the rules to include looking at their myspace or facebook page. I always got set back even in NC looking at those stupid pages. I blocked my ex, but would start unblocking her to look at her page. Now I just took myself off of facebook until I heal completely or we get back together, which ever comes first. But let me tell you...NO GOOD can come of looking at their profiles. NO GOOD at all. Link to comment
JohnGalt Posted February 11, 2009 Share Posted February 11, 2009 No offense, but it is good to see dumpers in this situation. Hopefully my ex will come back too and realize that boredom and GIGS is not worth throwing away something real. Link to comment
BrokenheartUK Posted February 11, 2009 Share Posted February 11, 2009 I agree John, I do sincerely hope that my posts give some comfort to all the dumpees among us here. Us dumpers aren't all heartless b*stards! Let me tell you, the grass is never greener and just because your eye may wander, it doesn't mean you should give up what you have. Value your partner always, and learn from my mistake! Link to comment
Sunkist09 Posted February 11, 2009 Share Posted February 11, 2009 I've been a dumper in the last relationship. I dumped him, he stucck around for 4 months... then after my recent relationsihp ended... 8 months later, I realized, that he could have been the one and i should have stuck with him... so the Grass is 90% not greener on the other side...hahaa, but he has a gf now... and is ignoring me. Link to comment
brazilgirl21 Posted February 11, 2009 Share Posted February 11, 2009 Dumper > Dumpee. It's worse to live with the guilt of realizing the grass is NOT always greener in the other side... Link to comment
redreine Posted February 11, 2009 Share Posted February 11, 2009 This is my second day of no contact. I went out last night with some friends, and it was a blast! The day my ex broke up with me, I deleted him from myspace and facebook, but I've left him on aim and yahoo. The point of me doing that is so he can see my status changes, discussing how well I am doing. I have to admit, I've never been a Valentine's Day person, but last night was really hard for me when my friends and I were looking at Valentine's stuff, AND THEN. Right beside the Valentine's things were wedding things. GAH. That really hurt, considering my ex was my fiancee. I'm doing everything I can to keep busy. And I didn't cry all day yesterday. I am hoping upon hope that he comes to his senses sooner rather than later. Either way, I won't be getting back together with him (at least not right away), but the longer he waits the harder it will be when we do get back together. Link to comment
BrokenheartUK Posted February 11, 2009 Share Posted February 11, 2009 Either way, I won't be getting back together with him (at least not right away), but the longer he waits the harder it will be when we do get back together. I see what you mean, but I will say that - as a dumper - time has made me realise two things: 1) That I want her back (of course) 2) That I need to work on myself so I can be a better man for either her, or my future love. Erego, a certain period of time is good for you both. It will help you heal, and if he's so inclined it will allow him to make the changes necessary to himself so that if you do reconcile, it can be a new successful chapter in your life together. Best of luck, and congrats on the NC. It took me ages to realise about the whole social networking thing...beware leaving him on messenger software though, imagine how bad you'll feel if he changes HIS status to something you'd rather not read! Link to comment
parlae Posted February 11, 2009 Share Posted February 11, 2009 day 3 for me. (since i broke NC saturday night/sunday morning) it was a serious situation though. not gonna get into the details, but some guy was pretty much chasing me and my sister for about a hour (lol kinda funny now.but it was scary at the time) and it was my instinct to call my ex for help. anyway, i dont regret breaking the rules. but since i did, obviously i had to start over. i've been feeling pretty good these past couple of days though. i just feel it in my heart that we'll be back together. some may call it false hope, but i believe in us for some reason lol. reading my new book that i bought last week has really been helping me. it has questions at the end of each chapter (about myself, about my partner/ex, about our old relationship, and also how i'd like the new one to be) it just really puts things into a different perspective. and i've really been focused alot on myself lately. i know my ex would be proud if he knew all the things i've been doing to focus on myself. because one of the biggest issues in our relationship was, he didnt like how i made him my whole world and i never did anything to better myself (college,etc.) so i think this "break" is for the better, for now. so i can get my life in order. and if we ever do reconcile, the relationship will be better than it ever was before. "aint no kiss gonna ever be our last kiss; our love will always exist" ^ just a lyric from this Mariah Carey song i've been listening to ^ lol anyway, hope everyone is doing good with their NC challenge. even though i havent been posting here everyday like i was at first, i've still been reading and keeping up with everyone. and i think this way is better for me anyway (not counting each day and posting here to remind me that i'm COUNTING days lol) stay strong, everyone! -CHELSEA- Link to comment
BrokenheartUK Posted February 11, 2009 Share Posted February 11, 2009 reading my new book that i bought last week has really been helping me. it has questions at the end of each chapter (about myself, about my partner/ex, about our old relationship, and also how i'd like the new one to be) What book is this please, Chelsea? It sounds like something that would do me good to read too. Thanks, and good luck with the NC Link to comment
redreine Posted February 11, 2009 Share Posted February 11, 2009 Thanks, UK. I'm doing this no contact thing fully knowing that he will miss me and come back. In the meantime, I need to figure out what I need to do when he does come back. Link to comment
parlae Posted February 11, 2009 Share Posted February 11, 2009 What book is this please, Chelsea? It sounds like something that would do me good to read too. Thanks, and good luck with the NC thanks,brokenheart. the book is called Getting Back Together: How to Reconcile With Your Partner and Make it Last. by Bettie Youngs. it's really helped me alot. and i'm sure it'd help you too if you're looking to reconcile with your ex. best of luck! Link to comment
railguy Posted February 11, 2009 Share Posted February 11, 2009 Day 4 for me now. The next week is gonna be bad. Got v-day coming up. Then a few days after that would have been our 2 year anniversary. Blah... Link to comment
Ixtapa Posted February 11, 2009 Share Posted February 11, 2009 I see what you mean, but I will say that - as a dumper - time has made me realise two things: 1) That I want her back (of course) 2) That I need to work on myself so I can be a better man for either her, or my future love. How I wish that my (ex-) guy would think like that !!!! Link to comment
redreine Posted February 11, 2009 Share Posted February 11, 2009 This is just one of those hope for the best, prepare for the worst situations. Link to comment
parlae Posted February 11, 2009 Share Posted February 11, 2009 How I wish that my (ex-) guy would think like that !!!! me too. i have no clue what my ex is thinking at this point... Link to comment
brazilgirl21 Posted February 11, 2009 Share Posted February 11, 2009 I just found something out and am in a horrible urge to break NC. Please someone make me be strong!!! Link to comment
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