LilBear Posted December 8, 2007 Share Posted December 8, 2007 Hi. Me again. Had closure. So now back to NC day 1 Link to comment
Crows Posted December 8, 2007 Share Posted December 8, 2007 This is now approaching the longest NC period I have ever had. Almost exactly two weeks now. My string of luck continues. Last night my friend and I were walking on the tracks near my house and these three kids walked by us in toques, and as a car was pulling into a driveway,whipped eggs at it and ran. WE didn't care much and casually stood there, then later we realized that those people had called the police. So we just started to walk and the police had followed us and ran after us. Questioned us etc. My friend had a small amount of marejuana on him. The thing in, canada they don't really care. So he just put it on the ground, i had nothing. The funny thing is.. I rent out a basement suite wit my landlord who is a city police officer!! And we were standing right infront of the house! I was just honest "thats myhouse right behind me, we're going back inside right now." Our story sounded so ridiculous to the police and so ridiculous telling them, I felt like i was in cops becuase it was so unbelievable what we had told them what happened. Link to comment
blindreepr Posted December 8, 2007 Share Posted December 8, 2007 day 22 nc sometimes i feel like I want to break NC, but then I remember, what for? So she can make me feel terrible? Unattractive? Unloved and Unwanted? No thank you! Link to comment
Jackripp Posted December 8, 2007 Share Posted December 8, 2007 I feel breaking no contact will be a letdown. We all know it would be. We put these "perfect situations" in our head, but really, it won't work out that way. We won't hear what we want to hear. It will bring back painful emotions and feeling of rejection all over again. Day 5 for me.. Link to comment
lost_for_words Posted December 8, 2007 Share Posted December 8, 2007 Day 6 of NC It doesn't get any easier....as time goes on I keep thinking a) He's wondering what I'm up to and could possibly call anytime now - fat chance!! or b) He's so busy with his 'new life' that he's not given me a second thought Hmmm... Link to comment
AngryHeart Posted December 8, 2007 Share Posted December 8, 2007 Well, I failed. I gave in to replying to a pointless text message, which led to small talk, then me giving him advice on not running away from problems, telling him that I'm not ready to be friends yet, asked if he understood. No reply. Feel like crap basicaly. disappointed in myself, confused as to waht he wants, etc. etc. yeah.....which I never did it, he's back in control I guess which sucks Link to comment
lovemeorleaveme00 Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 angryheart..I think its time to find and do things that will focus your mind off this guy.I started by going to the movies by myself .At first it felt pathetic but just to have two hours of ex-free thoughts was the start I needed for a change.It was a daily relationship.I had to look for things to fill the daily void..Until I started enjoying it and then I started talking to old friends and just trying to keep in touch with people I havent been spending time with while I was with my EX.I started visiting and driving to old friend's houses.I practically read a lot of books (self help) which helped me snap out of my negative mindset... I worked harder,worked late..anything that would keep my mind off him...the urges to text him were lesser and lesser..2 weeks,3 weeks..a month.. Sometimes I look at other men and just start wondering what's their love story.I had to be around people who where busy working to achieve their goals.I just did everything in my power to keep myself busy and I had to stop the why's..you can start doing this slowly...You will definitely not be able to forget him but at least if you have so many new activities and start seeing new faces,the past will be what it is..past..Someday you will still talk about him,talk about what happened but its not going to be the center of your gravity anymore.. Its not easy,its painful.. but not everything that makes us happy is right .Sometimes everything thats right can be painful in the beginning ..but hopefully there will come a time when choosing whats right will make us happy. Link to comment
lovemeorleaveme00 Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 its been 14 days!!! Its been 16minutes and 21 days since you took your love away (again)..when he called me..that led to him not calling me again..but Im ok! I heard this on the radio today.......... Nothing Compares to You ~ Sinead O'Connor It's been seven hours and fifteen days Since you took your love away I go out every night and sleep all day Since you took your love away Since you been gone I can do whatever I want I can see whomever I choose I can eat my dinner in a fancy restaurant But nothing ... I said nothing can take away these blues, 'Cause nothing compares ... Nothing compares to you It's been so lonely without you here Like a bird without a song Nothing can stop these lonely tears from falling Tell me baby where did I go wrong? I could put my arms around every boy I see But they'd only remind me of you went to the doctor guess what he told me Guess what he told me? He said, girl, you better have fun No matter what you do But he's a fool ... 'Cause nothing compares ... Nothing compares to you ... All the flowers that you planted, mama In the back yard All died when you went away I know that living with you baby was sometimes hard But I'm willing to give it another try 'Cause nothing compares ... Nothing compares to you sinead, go for 29 hours and 14 more days ....of NC and post here.. Link to comment
lovemeorleaveme00 Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 extra 12 hours break to get back again to NC Link to comment
blindreepr Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 day 23 nc i dont even know why im counting anymore, i hope to never talk to her again, unless its her begging for me back. Link to comment
delerium6 Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 I'm on Day 7 and constantly wonder the same questions about my ex-gf, even though I know I shouldn't. Day 6 of NC It doesn't get any easier....as time goes on I keep thinking a) He's wondering what I'm up to and could possibly call anytime now - fat chance!! or b) He's so busy with his 'new life' that he's not given me a second thought Hmmm... Link to comment
bustertypsy Posted December 10, 2007 Share Posted December 10, 2007 day 22 nc sometimes i feel like I want to break NC, but then I remember, what for? So she can make me feel terrible? Unattractive? Unloved and Unwanted? No thank you! Here,here!! Link to comment
foleno Posted December 10, 2007 Share Posted December 10, 2007 Here is day 7 or 8. I have be doing good and bad. The holidays are coming, and a friend of mine decides to hook me up with a friend of hers to help take my mind of things, I met her, but am thinking about my ex, I Know I have to move on even thou I wish they would call. Well any way this girl is really nice, but I am not motivated to really peruse anything and my friend keeps pushing it so I agree to take her out for coffee and then the girl tell me do not get the wrong idea but I just want to be friends. Then she said me and this guys broke up and I am not ready to date some one, I say so you were not trying to met any new guys now. I just want some new friends. I guess that is what happened and I am just writing it. I really relized my ex is not coming back. I have been exercising every day since we broke up. Have not drunk, smoked or smoked M since then to. Been in counseling , and been wondering was that love. I mean dam. Or are we that animalist were me mate move on and then leave when the attraction goes? Just a thought. I just wish my ex would have been friends, a little closure would be nice. Link to comment
foleno Posted December 10, 2007 Share Posted December 10, 2007 My ex the last time we talked seemed very understanding. Kinda almost caring. I said I love you enough I hope your happy and get the love u want from this new love. I said I would delete your number and email. I sent one last email saying I would be here for you as a friend or lover when you are ready and asked if one of the relatives could put my belonging out side, when my ex is away. My ex told me that they lost thousands of dollars in relationships, to get over it and stop bothering me. This scares me. What is the deal with this. Any one have similar stories. I mean my ex never did anything mean. It seemed so out of character. Any info would be nice. I guess were not getting back together. Link to comment
bostoneric Posted December 10, 2007 Share Posted December 10, 2007 just found this site today and its nice to see there are many others going/have gone through the same long story kinda short, we started our relationship on the east coast where I'm from. She wanted to move back to her hometown to be with her family and start a new one with me I gave up my family/friends/job for our future together. we moved, she was able to land a very nice job very quickly, I struggled to find a career without taking a 15 to 20% paycut because cost of living is so much cheaper... during this time I took a pt job just for some $. I guess we had some normal relationship issues before we moved figuring the move would take care of them. well the move was hard on me, new place with no friends and family and not knowing anywhere/anything fun so i depended on her a lot. well we were her 4 months and I finally had to do something about the issues that were just there between us. I ended up finding out she had become interested in this girl @ her job and had been out 2 times with her, which i knew about but did not know she was interested in her. well i thought about this for a day.. had the talk with her.. we need to work on our issues which includes maintaining a manogamis relationship... so I went to some individual counseling to work on my communication skills. and we also went to a couples session... towards the end of the session the therapist recommended a time line for working on our issues... basically we'd both have to invest 100% into working hard to fix our issues.. this included her ending anything/everything with this girl.... she was very hesitant, and said she was unsure she couldnt do that. right there I knew it was over... after the couples session she went out with some friends so we didnt even get a chance to talk/process it together.. i later found out after meeting with her friends she met with this girl... the next morning she said our relationship is over... that night after work was very uncomfortable between us... again like we were just ignoring issues... halfway through the night she moved out to the couch....during that day i realized i needed to take time away from her, staying in the our house wouldnt work for me. after work that day I told her in the morning I would be leaving because i need time to heal and because i respect her choice to not be with me. she was really surprised by that and said it made her sad.. she thought we would just not live in the same bedrooms and keep living in the same house.. i told her I couldnt do that because I love her to much.. we talked a little more. later that night we said our goodbyes to each other she told me to tell her when i safely get to wherever i'm going and she headed over to her parents house for the night because she was so sad... I talked to her sister later that night and was told that she was a complete mess as she left towards her parents... that night i packed up a bunch of clothes into a few boxes and a couple bags of survival stuff.. the next morning when I left i had the hardest time closing the door behind me, i was in shock i was doing this. I left the state and drove 10hrs down to a friends place to stay, after arriving here a bunch of us went out for dinner. it took me about an hour to txt her to tell her I made it safely... went like this. me - hey its really hard for me to not call, but i made it safely. her - i know me too, i'm glad you are safe. thank you for the cards(i left her a simple goodbye card). i only want the best for you. me - I feel the same for you. this is very hard and i miss you so. her - i miss you too, but its the right thing to do. we will be ok. me - yeah but it hurts a lot. i'm really upset its over. you are very special. i'll be here for a few days then head another 5hrs to some more friends. not sure how long i'll be there for, going to head to my parents for xmas then back to friends after... besides the heartache which totally sucks now i'm dealing with not having a home anymore and trying to decide where to call home next.. so today is day 1 of NC after leaving yesterday. it hurts a lot and is really hard. i'm a little afraid of not having a future plan. Link to comment
not my real name Posted December 10, 2007 Share Posted December 10, 2007 Day 21 today, nearly there! Feeling great about life, in fact today I actually jubilantly declared that I love my new life. Then something will make me think about him and BAM it's like a tonne of bricks allover again. It is only for a while though and I just remind myself that the feeling will pass and try not to let it get me down. There are definitely more ups than downs these days I signed into messenger and I can see that he is online which unnerves me - I know he has two contacts, me and his new 'friend'. Ugh. He never used to use MSN before unless it signed him in automatically but he was never one for chatting, now he has his status set to 'away' it looks as though he is using it indeed. Hmm.. I will not click on him, I am strong!! I must say it makes it easier that he works away. I've seen a couple of breakups in my circle lately and they keep running into eachother and falling back into old habits, fortunately I have no option but to hold my head high and soldier on. Link to comment
lovemeorleaveme00 Posted December 10, 2007 Share Posted December 10, 2007 day 15 for me..he still enters my dreams Link to comment
ycmanvs Posted December 10, 2007 Share Posted December 10, 2007 Day 10. I am starting not to care. Link to comment
foleno Posted December 10, 2007 Share Posted December 10, 2007 You did the right thing. Maybe doing something else. HMM. I think at least you let this person know what they were doing was not acceptable and they will know this behavior is not appropreate. It suck you invested so much of your life in this person, but you just won the lottery. You could have had the kid and the perfect job a few years into it and this girl could have pulled this on you then. You are very lucky. I know it is hard to feel the luck through the pain. I just feel in love for the first time at 25, now its over and I have to ask my self was that love, or just some animal reaction thing that happens over time. Good luck man keep posting of the site it helps Link to comment
blindreepr Posted December 10, 2007 Share Posted December 10, 2007 day 23 nc, one week away from a month, I will make it! Link to comment
lost_for_words Posted December 10, 2007 Share Posted December 10, 2007 Day 8 NC, my personal best, haha. Struggling with it still, but I know its for the best Link to comment
lost_for_words Posted December 10, 2007 Share Posted December 10, 2007 Oops, duplicate post Link to comment
bostoneric Posted December 11, 2007 Share Posted December 11, 2007 well day 2 is shot... she called me today to see how i was doing on my drive. (6 more hours today after 10 on saturday) we talked for a few, really unconfortable. told me how when she got home after i left how hard it was, and how she forced herself to pack up any of my stuff and took down all our pictures. sees she's doing a lot better then me... time to start all over tomorrow @ 1. Link to comment
Crows Posted December 11, 2007 Share Posted December 11, 2007 Day 13... tommrow will tie the longest NC ive had. 14 days was when I called her on her bday. Link to comment
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