coffee at their house after a date? and should i pursue this?

[jessicake]

i went on 2 dates with this guy that i find really interesting and makes me laugh. i think he is cute-ish as well...

 

the first date was really fun, it was playful as well as a talking date. it ended up lasting from 8pm till 3 in the morning. we went to movies and talked and pretty much just date stuff. we got along quite well.

 

he asked me to go back to his after for coffee. and i politely declined and said i should get back soon.

 

then the next night he was at a lounge/bar with his friends and he invited me to go there. i said i might duck in but didnt end up doing that. he then txt me to share a taxi home. (i was in the area and we live close by) i said ok. and we ended up going for a walk around where we lived. he asked me to go back to his for coffee again and i politely declined again. but we ended up just chatting and walking for an hour or so and then we kissed. it was really gentle and sweet.

 

my problem is... i just got out of a 3 yr relationship a month ago... am i ready to be dating again??? my ex broke up with me, and even though it was a very nice break up i was still quite upset about it.. i dont want a guy to be hurt because it turns out to be a rebound... or should i approach it as just fun?

 

and because i havent been dating for a while... what does it mean when u go to coffee at ur dates house? do they expect more than just coffee? i wouldnt have minded going, but i didnt want him to get the wrong idea that we were going to be more intimate.

[Broken_Doll_ParTs]

my problem is... i just got out of a 3 yr relationship a month ago... am i ready to be dating again???.

 

Do you feel like your ready to be dating? If you are then go for it, if not then tell him how you feel.

[J6hn]

You're the only one who knows whether you're ready or not.

You shouldn't have to ask yourself. You should know.

Consider it fun until you build a connection, when you get the connection and you can feel it, you're ready.

[selkie]

.. what does it mean when u go to coffee at ur dates house? do they expect more than just coffee? i wouldnt have minded going, but i didnt want him to get the wrong idea that we were going to be more intimate.

 

I guess thats a take on come up and see my etchings..........

Coffee is simply code word for nookie.

[LittleLion24]

Please be smart. If a guy that I didn't really know kept asking me back to his house for coffee I would be a little worried. Don't put yourself in a position that could become trouble if you know what I mean. Be smart and keep your safety in check.

 

You're the only one that knows if you're ready to date. Make sure you set the pace and don't let someone talk you into going too fast if you're not ready.

[insofar]

am i ready to be dating again???

Only you can answer this question. Are you still going through thoughts of why your ex broke up with you, what you could have done differently, etc? Does it still pain you to think about them?

 

what does it mean when u go to coffee at ur dates house? do they expect more than just coffee?

Likewise, this depends on the guy. I'd say it depends how much you trust him; if your trust level still isn't very high, keep politely declining. He shouldn't be taking it personally that you're not going to his place on the second date. If you do trust him not to take advantage of you, you could make it clear that you just don't want it to go beyond coffee tonight. You'd be able to tell a lot of what he was thinking by how he reacts to that.