Men + Pride?

[SpeedingCars]

Well...

He broke up with me about two months ago due to arguments and lack of trust. He still really liked me and the first two weeks, he had plans to get back with me until he said I stopped talking to him so we drifted apart. He found someone new about 1 1/2 months later (apparently, she cheated on him with her ex, but he's "waiting it out" to see if it's 100% sure. From what my best friend said he told her, he wants to get revenge because he hates being humiliated. She's always nagging him about whether or not he truly cares about her because their one month recently passed and he forgot.) He calls me occasionally and we talk for 1-2 hours and when I feel as if the conversation is getting too nostalgic, I tell him I have to go. He also tells my best friend every single time we make contact or I look at him (he told me he was really surprised I waved to him while he was with his current gf and he'd never expect it)... sometimes I act a little too standoffish, I have to admit. When I want to seem like I don't care, I go ALL the way, even if it kills me inside!!!!

 

More than likely, I'm looking into it WAYtoo much but it makes me happy to think that he even remotely cares if I talk to him or not.

 

He's a Capricorn (I'm very into star signs!) and would rather eat his own toe than to be humiliated in front of people with rejection. He's good at hiding his feelings, but I've been with him at his very sensitive moments, so I guess my INTUITION tells me the 'spark' is still there...

 

When he told me about his current gf (he told me about her a week before they started dating), I told him I was glad we both moved on, only because I didn't want to seem weak.

 

I was just wondering, if a VERY stubborn man wanted to be with you again, would he swallow his pride and ask for you back or would he let things be? I hardly show signs that I care about him... basically, the vibe I give to him is that I wouldn't notice if he fell off the face of the Earth... good or bad thing?? I'm not sure...

 

Also... how would you go about getting someone back if you were the dumper? Grovel? or try and be friends first and work from there?

 

Stories, opinions, comments, etc...

Please be as nice as possible ... I've had enough "You should move on" or "He doesn't care about you"...

[Maverick32x]

Well, I'm a pretty prideful person, but if I really liked a girl, and she kept shooting me down, and acting like I was the least important thing in the world, I really would lose interest pretty fast..... if he has a girlfriend NOW, I would really just back off... it's not really something that you should play a part of.... I would say just keep it cool, you don't need to be a jerk and not be friends with him if you don't want to... how long did you guys date? It seems like he is unsure of what he really wants, if he just started dating a girl, and still calling you... thats kinda weird to me...... I guess I don't have much advice, but I think you need to look deep down and figure out what YOU want.... and than figure out where you are going from there..... If you want to be friends with him.... go ahead and talk to him.... if you want to have nothing to do with him.. than just keep ignoring him...

 

What I'm going to assume happened was he broke up with you, realized he made a mistake, and wanted to go back... but realized you weren't interested, and just moved on.... and probably is in the midst of a rebound... but ya, I don't really know for sure ;; good luck~

[SpeedingCars]

Thanks!!

 

We went out for about 9 months. Yeah, I could be less of jerk... I want to be with him and for some odd reason, I feel as if I will.. it's just wrong timing.

 

I was planning on telling him how I really feel, etc... but I guess it's not a good idea now that he's in a relationship, right?

[Maverick32x]

ya, I would say let him figure things out.... And you don't have to be a jerk to him, just don't make yourself readily availible.... Also, keep your options open for anyone else too