Why has he not called in a week?

[melinda1122]

Ive had a crush on a guy for like two years who I have seen out several times at local places. I felt we had this attraction as we would both always stare at each other and smile. A few weeks ago, he was alittle more bold and came up right next to me and gave me a huge smile (I did nothing out of shyness). I did get the courage though to have my friend give him my number before I left.

 

He called a few days later (Monday night) and asked what I was doing for the weekend. (I was going away on vacation so suggested maybe we get together the next night while we were both out. He eneded up calling me twice the next night and met me at a bar I said I would be at (He pretty much ditched his plans to go somewhere else). When he saw me, he got a huge smile on his face and said he noticed me several times and smiled at me because he was really attracted. Stupid me though was kind of drunk from a basketball game I attended earlier (I was also nervous) and spouted out how I noticed him for two years and thought he was really cute. Everything seemed to be going well (his friend left) and he was giving me attention but then he sort of started acting different and at 2 AM said he had to leave but would walk me to my car. I think I was acting too interested in him and when he walked me to my car, I kissed him and he looked a little uncomfortable and kind of turned it into a hug. I then kissed him again and he hugged me and said "why don't we save this for another time when you get back after Monday."

 

There was no doubt an attraction based on how happy looked and the way he was looking at me inthe beginning but Im afraid I did something to turn him off, being that I was drunk and acted too interested.

 

I came back on Monday and it is now Wednesday night, my feeling is he would have called by now if he was REALLY interested? Also, another mistake, I kept asking him if he had a girlfriend (Ive seen him out with someone in the past) and he would say no and then turn it back on me and ask if I had a boyfriend. (Truth is, I am still kind of involved with someone eho happpens to be his friend's cousin, but Im not sure if he knows). He's seen me with this guy before in the past and attended a few events together with his friend and my "boyfriend" but Im not sure if he was able to put it all together. He did keep turning it around on me asking if I had a boyfriend so, could that be a factor as well as to why he hasn't called yet? (The thing is, if he knew, he still called me and saw me out regardless so Im not sure that would be it).

 

I really had a thing for this guy and am upset I did something wrong. Thanks.

[zxcvbnm1982]

Depending on what it means when you say you're "involved" with someone else, you might have done something wrong if he knows about it.

Regardless, don't sweat him not calling you. Why don't you call him?

Again, though, you might want to do something with the other guy you're involved with to clear up any misunderstandings.

[SexySadie7]

I dunno. .I have the same problem.. Only I don't have a regular boyfriend.

I could of well written this same post myself.. Anyway.. the "why hasn't he called" fits in perfectly with what Has happened to me in the last 2 weeks.

I met this guy about a month ago and he seemed to really like me.

We exchanged numbers (kinda of my idea) and then he invited me over to his place the next day after class.

I went over there and we hung out... well.. then we went out to eat.

He seemed to really like til I told him I didn't have kids. He's got one, he's divorced.

But then he called me like a few days later after I had called him very late.. like 1 a.m.

Wel.. to make a long story short.. the 2nd time I went over to his place... it got to be very late and I asked him if he wanted me to leave or could I just crash there.

he was like.. "Oh, no.. why don't you stay here. You can sleep on the coach out here if you like.

He's got a little studio apartment so there's not much privacy.

Well. after a little while he said there no reason on why we couldn't share the bed...that he'd be a perfect gentlemen.

I had the same thing girl. I've been attracted to this guy from the moment i saw him.

It's rather hard to resist a good looking guy who's sleeping next to you.

We ended making love that night... and I saw him last week but he acted like it didn't even happen in a way.

I don't know. he said he didn't feel good.. but it's been a week now too.. and he's not called.

I'm devastated. It's not like the sex wasn't good. I thought it was great.. and he seemed pretty content at the time...but I think I've blown it in a large way to have sex with him so soon.

It used to be if you had sex with a guy you were attracted to.. he'd keep calling you.. now it seems to be like death wish in a budding relationship.

I've left a few messages on his phone.. geez.. he had a birthday last week. You would think if you were dating someone you'd want to talk to them on your birthday, wouldn't you? But.. he never called me on his birthday.

Last night i tried to call him to see what was going on? I called his phone and someone who sounded just like him answered..but then.. never said anything after I asked to speak to him... Later I called and no one would answer the phone at all!

I just feel so hurt and forgotten...

Maybe you can clue me into the male psyche.. I just figure out men at all.

I'm starting to feel like I'm never ever going to meet a guy who's decent to me and actually cares about me. It's an awful feeling....

[GeneralLee]

Contrary to popular belief, most guys don't really like drunk chicks. When you get drunk, that sweet little girl we're used to turns in Grandma's Corgi humping your leg, or some other equally uncomfortable situation. Naturally we have to grab the garden hose and let you sober up. It's also very possible that this guy really likes you, but doesn't have any "game" so he's been reading one too many online dating advice columns that say not to call her for a few days after a date , or wait until you call him. The problem is that these advice columns are all written by some hit-it-and-quit-it pro with more balls than brains (probably literally) and aren't really conducive to a healthy relationship. Just call him. Us guys are really simple creatures. If we like you, we want to know you like us, and we want to spend time with you. Don't try to read to far into what a guy does, it's like trying to read page ten in a book that only has three pages. Just call him, or go visit him, if he likes you he'll be overjoyed to see you (as long as you aren't drunk.)

[Batya33]

If you're interested in having a serious relationship I would avoid getting drunk in front of the guy who you would like someday to introduce you to his mother.

[need2bme]

OK, I am not so sure about the whole "drunk" thing. how drunk, is "drunk", anyway? Besides, I would worry more if you were drunk all the damn time.

 

As for not calling, who knows? I am having my birthday tomorrow and I can almost guaran-damn-tee that she will not call or if she even acknowledges me, it will be with a text. At which time, she will get much the same message that "Frisco" gave an ex and posted on here. Sad thing is, my ex-wife and ex GF call me and the girl who is supposed to really like me, does not. Anyways...

 

Could be a million reasons of not calling. I don't call anyone on my birthday. I expect them to call me. It is my day, after all. Have you tried calling him, since staying over?

 

I have noticed that some people are able to just turn their emotions on and off and I envy them. How someone can profess a "naturalness" and "exclusivity" to you and then the next day need a "break" and whatever; I will never understand. NEVER! Especially when they do it...Going slow is one thing...totally doing a 180, is a whole different thing...

[Lansing]

Man... Need2bme.. You are TOTALLY hung up on this girl you dated for a few weeks... You need to drop it. And one way you can start is to stop analyzing and thinking about it so much. I know it is hard, but, it seems like you see your situation in everyone elses post. You really need to move on from her and start meeting new girls. FOr whatever reason, things happened, it doesn't mean it will happen the same with the next girl. Get your confidence back and move on....

 

As for the OP... I think a guy will call if he is interested as long as you are giving him good vibes that you are interested back. Otherwise, he may think he could better use his energy elsewhere if you are coming accross as disinterested.

[n83]

You could text him and say you're embarrassed about drinking in front of him?? tell him you're sorry about the 3-way convo between you, him and jack daniels