Rebounds

[BrokenHeart82]

Ok so how long after a breakup is it considered to not be a rebound? Is it the length of time, personal feelings, or does everyone pretty much probably have that rebound person in between..thoughts??

[rose2summer]

I think once you are emotionally over your ex, it's no longer rebound.

 

Some people have formulas they use to calculate when it's time to start dating.

 

Mine is: for every year I am with someone, I take 3months off.

 

Rebounds can be very hurtful for all involved if your emotions are still invested in someone else.

 

Hugs, Rose

[Momene]

I've made jokes about people who have broken up on this board pairing off to have a rebound fling.

 

I'm almost certain that a rebound fling is a necessary part of getting over a major break-up. One thing we all need is reassurance that we are still attractive and a rebound fling achieves this. Sometimes a rebound fling lasts the distance. When I met my wife she had just split from a 5-year boyfriend. Now we've had problems in the last 2/3 years but none of them could have been forseen when we got married nearly 18 years ago.

[desertnomad]

I agree with your post Momene especially the part about reassurance. As long as both people are aware of where the other person is at in their life.

[BeStrongBeHappy]

i think a rebound relationship is one started when you are in the emotionally wounded stage of a breakup, still pining for the ex and grasping a new person like a life raft to buoy your feelings and fill up your time. so it is not a matter of time after breakup, but your mental state at the time you begin the romance...

 

if you are emotionally hurting, you can make all kinds of wrong choices, so always best to wait until you really aren't spending too much time thinking about your ex-, and have worked through the painful portion of your recovery and have moved into acceptance.