She rebounded with another guy, need some of your advice before I lose it please

[TheDoctor]

Ok alot of you know my situation, it was 3 months ago I broke up with my psycho ex. After we broke up she insisted on maintaining a friendship and I continued contact with her. There were times I was upset and cut off contact for 2 weeks but other than that we always remained friends.

 

We even saw eachother every 2 weeks just to update eachother on everything and she kept telling me she wants to get back, she misses me etc.

 

Well I finally said I want to know what you want so I can move on, Im tired of holding onto 1 another because I feel like a sitting duck and I don't want to wake up one day and realize Ive been going down the wrong track again. After saying that she finally admitted she's been lying to me and shes been going out with another guy since 1 month after the break up. So this means she's been seeing a guy for 2 months, while she's been talking to me, seeing me, manipulating me to feel like she's 'lost' without me and she wants me back.

 

I knew in my heart she was going to do this, but again I continued contact because of her persistancy and desperate measures to get hold of me. Finally, after she told me she has a rebound guy (Ironically,whoes a police officer, ironic because my last post here was about how my ex went to jail) I had ENOUGH! I changed my phone #, blocked her from everything I could possibly think of but my myspace. She tried a fake sn to IM me the next day but I blocked that too. It has now been 6 days and she hasn't contacted me, I'm not sure why but I know I've made the right choice.

 

I guess I'll ask you my questions in this order;

 

1- Is it immature to do NC after she found a rebound? I just can't bring myself to talk to her after decieving me yet again!

 

2- It isn't important to me because I don't want to be chased, but what made her finally stop contacting me for the first time ever? She is still capable of sending me myspace message, yet she hasn't which is quite shocking. Not even 1 apology, NOTHING! On the Instant messages the next day she told me she doesn't wanna lose my Im the most important person in the world to her but she just did this to get over me, because she cannot alone. She also said she'd like to start a new chapter of her life with me and let go of the old one.

 

3- This is the first time I've been down about the break up since the 1st month, do you think it's wise to date other girls and stuff right now? I went to a club last weekend and talked to alot of girls and they gave me their # and what not but I just felt wrong still. Why am I so loyal to this relationship that is long gone?

 

Thanks, any help would be HIGHLY appreciated

[ratherbesailing]

Hey Doc -

 

NC is the way to go, you are doing the right thing for both of you and that is why she has given up trying. Do everything you can to forget about her.

 

You have nothing to feel guilty about, go on a date if you want to. You don't have to dive too deep just go out and have some fun and discover that, although no one is really normal, there are people out there that aren't psycho.

[Dako]

You are torturing yourself.

 

If she's your ex, then accept she's your ex.

Sure you blocked her from contacting you, but you have to stop caring what she does.

 

You hold the key to freedom, and it's up to you.

Let go. It's hard, but the longer you drag this out with excuses, the longer it will hurt.

[zrehman]

Doc,

 

Your doing the right thing with the whole NC information. She has completely decieved you and you must not trust her anymore! There is no way an apology can help mend things. You need to let her go, if its meant to be, it will be.

 

I am sure she still has a place for you in her heart, but this new guy she is seeing, probably doesn't compare to you and she misses that, thats why she keeps you on the side because she can't find that part in the new guy. You need to let her go.

 

Hope you feel better bro!

[chai714]

Not really fair to label her "psycho", especially since youve continued contact. Remember, you once liked that "psycho." Lose the immature name-calling. Even if she is "psycho," don't ever tell anyone - they will find out on their own.

 

Other than that, Dako is right on.

[TheDoctor]

Not really fair to label her "psycho", especially since youve continued contact. Remember, you once liked that "psycho." Lose the immature name-calling. Even if she is "psycho," don't ever tell anyone - they will find out on their own.

 

Other than that, Dako is right on.

 

I call her psycho because she was 'dubbed' psycho by all the members that responded to my post a while back about my relationship while I was with her, she totaled my car, she went to jail, etc. Hence the reason I say it so people remember my post. But I see what you mean