She called my friend. What the...?!

[hllywood44]

It's been almost two months that I've iced my ex with NC. She dumped me out of the blue telling me she couldn't open up to me and that she wanted to be alone, spend time with friends, and travel. She had a big cruise to Mexico planned with her friends while we were dating that she was reeeeally looking forward to. Last Sunday is when she would have gotten back from that cruise. The next day she called my best friend's wife, who is also a great friend of mine and who she met twice and doesn't even know. She left her a message saying that she got her number from their neighbor that she met at their party while we were dating and wanted to say hi and keep in touch. My friend's wife called me saying how weird the whole thing is. To me this seems like she thought she was going to have a better life without me hanging out with her friends, hooking up with other guys, and traveling, but when the fun was over she realized it wasn't all it was cracked up to be. Then as a desperate attempt to figure out what I was doing or contact me indirectly she calls someone close to me. My ex is terribly petrified of confrontation. She broke up with me over the phone and I know she would not be able to just pick up the phone and call me if she wanted to get back with me after dumping me on my * * *. I told my friend not to call her back. So is this girl going to eventually have the guts to call me? Any feedback would be appreciated on this one folks.

[annie24]

hey - I wouldn't read too deeply into things. maybe she called your friend because she wanted to see how she was doing. or maybe she was curious about what you were up to, but if she isn't calling you, then who cares? I really wouldn't overanalyze what your exes motivations are or how much fun she is having. afterall, you weren't there on the cruise with her, so how do you know she's not enjoying life right now?

 

good luck

[LostInMyThoughts]

It's possible that she's trying to keep tabs with you, but if she was, she's pretty stupid to try your best friend. It could be that your ex just meant what she said.

 

Last year me and my soon to be ex-wife went out with my sister and a bunch of her friends. My ex wife hit it off really well with one of my sisters friends and wanted to keep in touch with them. After we got divorced, I guess my ex contacted my sisters friend wanting to hang out, but since my sisters friends tend to think of me as family, my ex got a very polite have a nice day and go shock yourself.

[hllywood44]

It's possible she was sincere in wanting to just keep in touch with my friend, but there's a lot of people out here in LA to be friends with. I think that's crap that she's trying to befriend MY friend. I would never call any of her friends because I think that move is just a way to stay in touch with her. She literally had only one conversation with my friend. And on top of that my ex lives an hour out of LA. The whole thing is sketchy to me. I think it's a desperate move either way. If she's just calling to be friends with my friend, she's desperate for friends. If she's calling my friend to keep tabs on me or slither back, then she's desperate for my attention. I was just moving on from her when she made this call and that's why I'm pissed about this.

[kafka]

hey - I wouldn't read too deeply into things. maybe she called your friend because she wanted to see how she was doing. or maybe she was curious about what you were up to, but if she isn't calling you, then who cares? I really wouldn't overanalyze what your exes motivations are or how much fun she is having.

I agree.

 

I understand how this has had the effect of picking a scab off of a wound and perhaps that was her intention, so try not to give her any satisfaction out of this.

 

Here's the thing - you're sat there fuming about this and that is a terrible waste of energy. Don't you think?

 

If she's just calling to be friends with my friend, she's desperate for friends. If she's calling my friend to keep tabs on me or slither back, then she's desperate for my attention.

Stick with those explanations, laugh it off and pity the woman.

[hllywood44]

Stick with those explanations, laugh it off and pity the woman.

 

You're right, but there's a part of me that still wants her back. I know I can get through this little set back though. But if she calls me or any of my long lost cousins I'll be back in touch.

[annie24]

Stick with those explanations, laugh it off and pity the woman.

 

You're right, but there's a part of me that still wants her back. I know I can get through this little set back though. But if she calls me or any of my long lost cousins I'll be back in touch.

 

no.... only if she calls YOU. she can't call anyone else and get a response. she has to own up and call YOU.

[hllywood44]

Thanks, Annie. Yeah, I'm totally not going to call her unless she calls me directly. But I was wondering if that was the right thing to do, so thanks.

[Captain34]

I think I'm going to wait on a direct call myself.