I did it to myself again!!! Why????

[Jonathan_in_fl1607306450]

To save everyone alot of time I will cut to the chase. (if anyone is interested I posted in March-ish? That will recap. I just ended a relationship with the girl who was the girl of my dreams. This is a woman I have had an interest in for 4 years. I never new her, just admired her from afar. When we met ( a year ago ths weekend it was nothing short of magic) We both fell hard and fast. The memories of our first 7 months together are the happiest of my life - truly. It all fell apart when she started to have feelings for her ex. I did not understand the implications of this and decided to work through this with her. Over the next 6 months she flip flopped between me and him, well she would spend 1 day with him as a friend and realize that she loved me. I reached the point where I couldn't trust her - I felt such pain. For some reason though I worked harder to keep the relationship alive, and I mean I gave 1000000% To the point where I put my life on hold to please her and make sure she was happy. I have lost 22 pounds (and I wasnt overweight at all before I was 175-ish) and feel as if it is the end of the world. She has alot of aquaintainces, everyone loves her, she is always invited on trips, and I am left devastated, how do I get beyond this girl. I considered her the love of my life before I even met her, and it is so hard to let go. Because letting go means letting go of the source of the happiest times of my life, I truly planned on marying htis woman, and at a time she felt the same. Now everyone tells me that this is what she does to every guy she dates. Her poor ex has been pining away for 2 years because she keeps tagging him along. I do not want to end up like him. Please somebody say something. I held it together for about 5 days after the breakup, than Saturday I broke down and have been an emotional wreck ever since. What can I do? It seems so unfair that I have sacrificed so much and it is unappreciated, now she is out with tons of people and I am left alone devastated. Help me heal this pain?

[Stuck-On-Him]

Hey, Well I know how you feel. The same thing happened/is happeing with my ex bf. It really sucks, and I know you dont wanna hear this, but if she loved you she wouldnt do anything to hurt you. I know how it feels, I really do, you are so afraid to let go, cause she means so much to you. You love her, but you can still love her and let go. Letting go just means your moving on. Get out, meet new peop, start dating, thats a hard one but it will come over time, whatever you do, dont wait for her. If she is the one for you, and she really is, you will get back, whether or not you wait for her. God has someone out there for you, just wait, youll find them, or she and you will change so you two are meant for each otehr. Best of luck

Lea

email removed

[John4887]

The above poster is absolutely correct. She's been there, and so have I. Breakups really suck terrible. On my last breakup all I did was moan, lie in bed and listen to The Cure all day long and at night I'd stay up and write until I fell asleep.

 

The BEST thing to do, as femme poster above points out, is to get out and be with friends and try to forget her. If she loved you, she wouldn't hurt you. How truer can words get like that? What a revelation to you, this is your mantra to live by. Do it, and you'll find yourself looking back at the sorrow and the pain.

 

Just stop thinking of her, and if she wanders back into your life, tell her not to, and tell her what it does to you.