Has anyone.....

[Gracelove]

Has anyone been drugged and raped and is sad or extremely upset about it?

If you can, please share your stories.....

[rose2summer]

I was almost raped once, the intent was there, but the plan failed for the guy, he gave me a date-rape drug but I gave the drink to my friend. oops!

 

Then the next time, a different guy, was successful. I was very upset about it, but not really anymore. With time the pain subsides. What are you feeling exactly Grace? I have seen 2 other posts from you, so I am concerned. PM me if you want to talk privately, I would love to help.

 

Hugs my friend,

 

Rose

[vesper]

I have been drugged by a guy, GHB, then had sex while completely out I guess it would be 'officially' considered rape...but I am uncertain as to how everyone here is defining it.... but I don't remember having any control over my body...I was extremely frightened...

 

I remember standing at the door and not being able to hold myself up and throwing up all over his place because his apartment was spinning around me and I could not figure out what was up or down and I remember passing out after not being able to keep myself coherent. I have no idea if he had sex with me after I was passed out, but it was very scary.....

 

But I guess if I was willing to go to his apartment and get naked, then I was ready to have sex. I don't know where people draw boundaries here on what they consider 'date' rape.

 

It was not violent, I was just very frightened...and felt like I did know that I was going to lose all sense of control....

[celticghirl]

my ex boyfriend almost raped me. i kept telling him i wasnt ready. i am a virgin and he felt i was using that against him. an excuse. he tried to force himself on me.

 

when i refused he beat me up instead. i had to file a complaint against him for everything he did and i regret to say he cant get done for attempted rape and assault as i didnt report it straight away

 

i also had my drink spiked not long ago and it was a date rape drug. i threw up non-stop and the flashbacks were frightening.

[rose2summer]

If you didn't consent, aminae, it's rape. Sex must be between 2 consenting partners.

[JimmerJammer]

you know... i'm not the type of guy to do something so sleezy and disgustingly dishonest as to spike a girls drink with the intention of sleeping with her. But you know what always makes me wonder? how those guys that slip this crap into girls drinks seem to have no problems in getting the opportunity to do this when I won't even come close to doing anything like that and have a great difficult time getting any opportunities with women.

 

its "funny" how the guy who's intent is to be with a girl and get to know her the honest way, is met with such resistance and the guy who is sly and pulls crap like spiking their drink gets the girl.

 

can someone explain this??

[rose2summer]

The way they do it is offer to buy the woman a drink, and while they walk back, wala, they put the drugs in it. It's terrible!!!

[Aurian]

its "funny" how the guy who's intent is to be with a girl and get to know her the honest way, is met with such resistance and the guy who is sly and pulls crap like spiking their drink gets the girl.

 

can someone explain this??

 

They only get the girl because she was unwilling. Its like complaining that a carjacker gets to drive a Mercedes while you have to work hard to buy your own. Except its not a possession you're stealing, its the woman's self.

[Gracelove]

Hey There Aminae!

 

I would say that you were date-raped.

 

I had some of the same symptoms, and today my therapist told me that she believes I was given GHB.

 

You were disoriented like I was, everything was blurry, I couldn't stand up on my own after a while, I was in and out of consciousness.

It was horrible.

And I lost feeling in my arms and legs.

 

The rape was so painful that is brought me back to consciousness.

It was un-necessarily (spelling?) rough.

 

I can totally relate to feeling scared.

It's awful.

 

Hey There Celticghirl!!!

 

I feel so sorry for you, I can totally relate to the whole boyfriend thing.

I was in a similar situation with my ex-boyfriend. Only I didn't say, "No".

It was an abusive relationship and was at the point where what he'd say would go.

He was unstable.

He told me my options (oral or intercourse).

Instead of saying no, I said nothing, and let him have intercourse with me.

I wasn't aroused or anything, so it was extremely painful.

I just laid there and silently cried.

 

You should be proud that you said, "no".

You didn't deserve to be beaten.

 

It's good you were strong enough to speak up for yourself despite the consequences.

I wasn't strong enough to do so at that time.

 

You have frightening flashbacks?

I can related to you there as well.

Except that I don't have them frequently.

I don't allow myself to think about the details, I'm fortunate because for the most part I have a choice in the matter.

But there are times where I can't control the flashbacks, they slip-up anyways.

 

Hold on to those flashbacks though, they are memories.

 

The parts I remember about the rape, I appreciate, ya know.

I choose not to acknowledge them most times but I'm glad that I at least remember some parts.

 

Hang in there, you're not alone.

 

Hey There Rose2summer!!!

 

I'm feeling okay I guess.

I've made a decision to report the rape so, that's that I suppose.

 

I'm ready to move on in my life.

 

I have been having a range of emotions lately.

I feel sorrowful, yet more powerful.

I feel ready.

Ready to face my fears. Ready to face my emotions.

 

Whatever happens, happens ya know.

I can't run anymore.

If I have a slight breakdown, so be it. If more difficulties come, so be it.

 

I'm just ready to get this part over with.

 

I'm a little anxious. I wish I could go tomorrow, but that won't be the case.

 

I feel like screaming. I don't know why, but I do.

 

I can't believe it, ya know. I can't believe I'm doing this, but I am.

Whew!

 

Well, we'll see what happens.

 

Thanks for sharing your story, and thank you for letting me know that it does get better with time.

 

I really need to hear that at times.

I have nothing to lose, and much to gain.

 

Hey There JimmerJammer!

 

I must say, that it sounds like you're almost regretful that you haven't tried to drug a girl in order to "get her".

 

Are you looking to actually have a relationship with a girl one day?

Because let me tell you, rape isn't the beginning of a beautiful relationship.

 

It's destroying someone's world, and bringing them more pain than they ever could have fathomed.

 

By "get girls" are you referring to sex? Because there are other methods of getting sex.

A man could go somewhere and pay for sex.

 

There is nothing admirable about drugging girls.

Don't even consider it as a way to "get girls".

It's wrong, and heinous, and horrible.

 

Hey There Aurian!!!

 

Thank you for your reply, I like your thinking. And I totally agree with you

[NKP]

Yeah i was raped my my own brother over and over and i was raped my someonei didnt even know. and i went into a real bad depression i tried to end my life, i blocked everyone out of my life, i wouldnt talk, i wouldnt eat, i wouldnt even leave my room, i just hated myself so much. I ended up in hospital a few times, got sent to a mental hospital, it didnt help me really, they put me on meds and i was in a mental hospital for a bout 5 weeks and then i got sent back home and 2 nights later i od on some of my meds, ended back in hospital, i would of died if i my mother didnt find me pasted out in the bathroom. And that time when i was in hospital i cried the whole time, all i could think about was do i want to live like this for the rest of my life, and am i going to let these to guys reck the rest of my life, so from that day i took the right amount of meds, i am still on them, and i will never forget what happened and i will never be like i use to be thoses guys stole that from me and didnt even care, my meds have helped me out a whole lot. i havent really talked to anyone about what went on besides the cops and well thats the way i like it, i just helped myself out pretty much

[Gracelove]

Hey There Kita!

 

How are you doing today?

I hope all is well with you.

 

I'm so very sorry to hear your story.

I know you're a survivor.

 

I must admit that I've thought about what I would do if I were raped again.

It's horrible possibilty, a nightmare.

 

I really, really sympathize with you.

To be violated again.......

 

Not eating, sleeping, talking, and suicide attempts sounds about right to me.

 

I would be in the same state.

 

I've started to feel the way you do lately, in the sense that I'm not going to let them ruin my life.

I'm going to fight like hell to be successful.

 

So if they ever see me again, they'll know that they couldn't destroy my life.

And that they should be ashamed.

 

This may sound a little bad, but I feel like those who rape, should be raped.

Just so they'll know how it feels.

 

I think that, that should be their just punishment.

And then, after they're raped, they should be locked up in solitary confinement for 30days.

 

I think that would be perfect, but not practical of course.

They'd probably come out extremely disturbed (as if they aren't already).

 

I too am on medicine.

 

The only thing I don't like about it is that I have to drive so far just to get it.

 

The medicine has really helped me.

 

I'm fortunate to have it.

 

Well, it's nice to hear from you again.

 

I didn't get much sleep last night, so I'm going to get a bit of rest.

 

Have a great day!!!

 

~Grace

[NKP]

Yes i do believe they should be punsihed aswel. Yeah i am doing okay, could be better but ill live

[ButterflyWrists]

I got raped, i was cuffed though, the 1st few times i was tied up, and i could escape

[Gracelove]

Hey There ____X:

 

I feel your pain.

Not being able to fight back is a really difficult thing to cope with.

 

Being helpless........

you know?

 

How long ago were you raped?

Where are you in your recovery process?

 

Things do get better.

I know sometimes it seems as if they never will.

 

Have you sought counseling?

 

I had a counselor, but today I just found out that I won't be able to see her any longer (money issues).

 

If it's at all possible, maybe you could be evaluated by a professional.

 

I was diagnosed with Major depression and anxiety disorder due to the rape.

Anti-depressants and sleep medicine have really helped me.

 

It's really hard to adjust to the medicine, but I believe it's worth it.

 

It'll be okay. I hope you'll be able to take comfort in the fact that you aren't alone.

 

It's a rough road, rape recovery.

 

I'm sorry that you were tied up. That's horrible.

It's really difficult to put feelings and emotions into words, regarding rape.

 

I've felt so many different emotions that I didn't have words for...even today.

 

Hang in there okay.

 

If you ever need to talk, PM me.

 

Sincerely

~Grace