Best Friends of 14 years and he has FEELINGS for me...

[Adrianne]

I'm a girl and my best friend is a guy, we've been best friends since we were 2. I guess we've never really seen each other in that relationship kinda way because we were like brothers and sisters being that we are both only childs.

 

So when we got to high school about mid 9th grade, he told me like, 'i have feelings for you, as more than a friend' and I told him like, 'i'm flattered and all, but i don't want to ruin what we have, this amazing friendship'. It's been about a year and a half now since that happened and it seems like in 10th grade we were back to being normal best friends because he had a girlfriend and all, but we're going into the 11th grade this Septemeber and we hang out of course everyday of the summer and yesterday he told me that he's falling for me again and he can't help it over the phone...he said, "please don't be weird about it when we hang out, i just want you to know"

 

The thing is we're seeing a movie tonight, it'll be the first time I see him in person since he's told me that he's had feelings for me again...I guess I'll try not to be awkward, but it's so hard because i know that HE LIKES ME...so it'll be different...

 

So my question is, how do I act? Pretend I never heard it? THANKS ALL

[DN]

Is there a possibility that you might like him as well in a romantic way? Is it just about being scared of losing the friendship?

[Beec]

Either pretend nothing happened or, if you want him too, bust a move.

[Derek]

If you can just let it be and not talk about it, fine, Time will eventually let his feelings fade.

 

But if it does come up, perhaps you can say

"Kenny, I don't think we are a romantic match right now,

but I want you to know I want you to be happy.

I think we should both try and get a boyfriend and girlfriend for each of us and we can gossip about them later on. Whatddya say?"

He'll mumble, "but I'll be happy with you..."

You'll say, " but it just can't work for me, I'm sorry, let's just enjoy the movie."

And he'll sulk...

 

Time will pass...

 

Then he'll get over it when he meets that Grade 12 girl with the flippy blonde hair and her cute apple bottomed jeans.

 

Then he'll really get over it when he's in college and meets 20 of those same kinda girls.

 

Then he'll marry one of those losers.

 

Then you'll be lonely and wonder "what if..."

 

 

Or not...

 

 

[brando]

Why is it that we feel awkward or uncomortable arounf someone who likes us more than just a friend.???

 

I havent figured this one out yet. Is it us that has the problem with their feelings?? Or is it them becuase they feel differently, or may picture things differently?

 

I can identify with how you feel, and i am sure it does make you feel a little uncomortable, but ever since i came to these boards i continue to ask myself why? We are not rresponsible for making another feel a certain way, or unfeel a certain way, they are only feelings, but when we are aware or are told someoone likes us in a romatic way, we act as if it was a curse, and end up treating the person differently, or avoid them.

 

Just curious. Open for feed back maybe to clear things up for the poster as well.

[traz]

I developed feelings for 2 of my closest friends, who were both girls. They never really go away. I'm best friends with one of them, and a good friend with the other one, and I definitely still carry those feelings with me somewhere inside. It's been about 5 years. I can still move on and have relationships, but as long as the friendship continues, expect him to always have feelings for you in some way.

 

For some reason I thought this might be relevant.

[picsite]

I developed feelings for 2 of my closest friends, who were both girls. They never really go away. I'm best friends with one of them, and a good friend with the other one, and I definitely still carry those feelings with me somewhere inside. It's been about 5 years. I can still move on and have relationships, but as long as the friendship continues, expect him to always have feelings for you in some way.

 

For some reason I thought this might be relevant.

 

Sorry to not really answer your question but I want to share that I AM IN THE EXACT position as traz, not 5 years, more like 1 year but still the same position. And to the poster, I told a friend I liked her and then she told me she just wanted a friendship and since i've told her I havent seen her but we talk a lot online but I can imagine the first time i see her in person what its going to be like.

[cadracco]

i think you should jsut tell him, that you dont want a gf bf relationship with him and wants to be normal friends, but you appreciate his thinking.. flattered ect what ever flatter means...

 

best not to avoid it, if not he'll keep on saying i have feelings for you... and so on... just tell him to stop saying it... and hopefully he gets a gf..