First Post - Poem

[hopeiseverything]

Hey Guys,

 

Have been reading a couple of the posts and they've been very helpful. Just wanted to say a friendly "HI" to probably the most helpful forum (emotionally-wise) on the net.

 

Anyway, me and my girlfriend are going through some tough times at the moment. I'm learning to walk again because of a nasty soccer injury I had (full knee reconstruction) - so its been hard on every esp the people that care for me.

 

So I thought I'd write a poem - its pretty average - however I really want to improve it and if you guys could maybe give me some constructive criticism that would be cool.

 

I would like to one day get married to the girl I'm dating now. She is definitely the one! We've been going out for 2.5 yrs and there's no turning back! I love her - and as a token of that love I'd like to get this poem inscribed behind our wedding photos or something... (you can maybe help me decide where too! However I've already thought that the inside of a G-String would be too sucky! )

 

Anyway - its called "Those three words" - and I haven't copied it from anyone - if it does bear resemblance to another's work then please let me know and I'll take it down.

 

Thanks and glad to be part of the forum!

 

 

--

Those three words

 

What those three words mean to me?

Those three words mean friendship.

They mean fellowship.

They do not mean arguments,

or malice,

or hurt.

They mean warmth,

and protection,

and care,

and compassion.

 

They mean that I will spend every waking morning looking into your eyes,

spend every sleepy night kissing you to bed.

 

They mean creating new life,

raising new citizens of the world.

 

They mean hope through challenges,

they mean light through darkness.

 

They mean forgiveness,

and purity of thought.

 

Those three words, said every special day, mean the world to me.

They give me life.

 

My heart rejoices every time those words are repeated,

it goes longing when they are not heard,

but it never becomes disheartened,

because it knows that those three words,

will be repeated soon enough.

 

Those three words are

felt in every moment,

experienced in every thought,

and embraced in every action.

 

I thank you for giving me the chance to say,

those three words.

I love you

[sumguy]

Well! A fellow West Australian! We're a rare breed on this forums! ^_^

 

Welcome to eNotalone, truly one of the better sites. I posted my first problem on over a dozen of these help sites, and only got quick, helpful responses here. And I've been back daily since =)

 

That's a really nice poem... like, Hallmark nice =P If you plan to do custom vowels at your wedding, pretty sure you can't go wrong with those! Maybe inscribe the first verse into a bracelet?

 

Anyway, enjoy your stay!

[yeawutever]

That's a cooooooooooooooooool poem!!!!!!!!!!

[hopeiseverything]

Cool! Thanks for the replies guys!

 

sumguy! Awesome to meet a fellow WestAustraliania - we are definitely an increasing population on the internet!

 

I only wish I had this forum to come to when me and my girl were going through some problems.I'll come here when we're going through life's little hiccups from now on!

 

Everyone here seems really matured and nice! Thats really comforting esp when I consider myself to be fairly mature for my age (25). And going through this injury has really taught me some of the more important lessons in life. I know I've got a lot of growing up to do though!

 

Thanks for liking the poem. It is very "Hallmarky" isn't it! I was thinking of putting it on the inside of the booklets or on the inside of the wedding invitation. But putting the first verse on a bracelet is an EXCELLENT idea! Full credit to sumguy!

 

Thanks Ailec1987 for thinking its cool! Feel free to use it if you want, I'd be really happy if it made someone else as happy aswell.

[PRSOV]

That's a very thoughtful poem...

 

If only we could all write like than