Deviant fetish or harmless inclination?

[Arrowsmith]

What do you think of people who prefer to date (or in the extreme, only date) people from a particular racial group other than their own?

 

I've been thinking about this issue for a while and I'm still on the fence about it. On the one hand, everyone has their own idiosyncracies when it comes to what they like in a partner, but on the other hand it suggests an attraction to a cultural stereotype that may supercede attraction to the individual.

 

What do you think?

[Dako]

Your title implies something pretty disturbing.

Deviant fetish?

 

Maybe they aren't being attracted to a cultural stereotype, but a person.

Some people just like certain types of people.

I'm white. My niece has had two black husbands, my nephews are both married to Mexicans. I suppose they met people thay liked and married them.

What kind of women attract you?

[LostInMyThoughts]

You bring up a good point Arrowhead.

 

Society has a lot to do with what people find attractive. In the US, we are bombarded with beauty in the form of very skinny, fair skinned individuals.

 

In part that helps shape what we think of as being "pretty."

 

But say in Africa, the tribes that have neck-rings. Those neck-rings, while unappealing to me, is considered very beautiful to them.

 

I'm not locked into dating a specific race, but I do know that certain aspects of culture prevent/turn-me off from races. Like say a traditional Indian woman. Not saying they would want to kcik it with my ABCD * * *.

[AwdreeHpburn]

fetish?

 

Inclination?

 

I'd say preference. And of course there is absolutely nothing wrong with having one, NO MATTER what it is, even if it's illegal. It's just a preference - meaning it's what you prefer.

 

If you ACT on the illegal ones however, you can get into legal trouble, but you are allowed whatever preference you want.

 

EVERYBODY has SOMETHING they find more attractive than something else. My husband prefers brunette's. He says he notices blondes but his preference certainly dictates where he looks and who he finds attractive and talks to, persues etc.

 

Its a personal preference...of someone who dates who and what they prefer, I say kudos for knowing what it is you like and going for it.

[Dako]

Lost,

You mean these lovelies in Thailand?

 

image removed

[neva_black_n_white]

Im like ultra confused. SO... let me get this right, you think... someone who likes a certain ethnicity has a fetish? im so confused.

 

I dont see how its a fetish or what you outlined it as in the title.

 

I dont think it matters at all. People date one another because they want to. Maybe youve got a fetish if youve had three boyfriends who had purple hair!

 

Its a little silly... or maybe theres more to your question that i got confused by.

 

I dont see anything random going on here, no.

 

But yeah, preferance is what id call it.

[Luke Skywalker]

I dont have a fixed racial identity, I'm mixed, half Black half White.

 

Personally, I tend to fixate towards people who are olive-skin or Indian looking, that have a brown or cinnamon skin complexion, and nice long hair, especially if they are from the Caribbean. There is a very strong ethnic fetish, even stronger than white women.

 

There is a tendency, with Indian-looking/mixed women, for me to go on a 'soap-opera' type of mode, and go high-strung emotionally, or to wear my heart on the sleeve. The thread I made 'how to read this girl' on Dating and Shy section is based on an Indian-looking woman. It's like I'd give my right arm if I could get a whole bunch of Indian girls to chase after me and be attracted with me. (figurative, not literal).

 

But the Indian, or Medieteranian olive-skin complexion is very attractive -- I just like that skin tone, and hair combinations as looking exotic.

 

But the problem with those type of girls, as my mom would say, is that they only like either their own race, or they like white people, because Indian people are too often 'white-wannabes' and they are usually have religions that are entirely contrary to my own. Too often this type of girls are described as sleeky and oily, or perhaps just difficult to read - like that girl on my thread 'How to Read this Girl'.

 

I feel a bit more distant with white woman, and do not seem to have any fetish in that area, although in the past, I used to like Blondes.

 

Chinese women - there used to be a fetish, but however it is a bit weaker at this time. But, that ethinic subgroup, and others are commonly seen being sexualised in the media. The beautiful slender petite figure, thin legs, eyes, and a Chinese accent sound exotic. However, I do not feel as 'emotionally' vulnerable with any other ethnic group, other than Indian-sub-types.

 

Trust me, if that 'How to you read this girl' subject girl, was any other race, even if she was white, it wouldn't have had the same impact of fuss that it has got. Ethnic fetish, that is what it is.

 

It got people suggesting I was a 'psycho' stalker the way I was going after that girl - but she was Indian, so, I guess it's a deviant fetish of some sort. But, as another poster in that thread said, there are other Indian-looking girls in this town anyway.

 

Ok, I need help. So tell me, how do I cure this deviant fetish? What do I have to take?

[itsallgrand]

I have no problem with preference.

 

HOWEVER, when someone will ONLY date people of a certain ethnicity, color, etc. I find that a huge, huge turn-off. Even if the ethnicity is mine.

 

Has to do with how I see things: people are people and it's weird to me to block out whole masses just because of a color/race/whatever.

 

I want someone who can appreciate a full-spectrum of beauty. Like me! lol.

[Luke Skywalker]

HOWEVER, when someone will ONLY date people of a certain ethnicity, color, etc. I find that a huge, huge turn-off. Even if the ethnicity is mine.

 

I'll date anyone who likes me, and wants to go out with me, and heck, even I'll even go out with girls that are not at all that attractive. So despite, I may have preferences of fetishes, they have no influence on social decisions such as dating.

[Daddy Bear]

i understand your question. there is a bar near here that caters to brown ladies and pink men. i think it's all a matter of preference unless there is some deep-seated need to dominate on the basis of a perceived racial superiority, in which case i would find it quite abhorrent.