I hate my life

[Mateo]

I Hate MY Life

i just cant live any more

all cause there a girl that i loved from day one and

everyone knows it and they always said i should ask her out but when

i finally did she didnt want to cause she didnt feel the same way

now normally that woudnt bother me

but this girl i cant stop thinking about the only time i dont is when i cut myself

and i dont know how much longer the cuts will stop the pain and the thoughts of being alone and without her i need a better solution and the only one i see is suicide then when i go to school people always aks when i will kill myself

and i always useto say never but now i kinda want to i eman if hte girl that i love with all my heart hates me and everyone in my school hates me then why should i even live i got no talent i cant play any sports or any intrument

i have nothing about me that makes me uniqe i could kill myself right now and noone would notice let alone care my mom is always working and never home i never knew my dad and i sit at home and want to kill myself but i dont cause one friend i have calls me every hour and talks to me she is the only friend/family i got she know everything about me even that i wanna kill myself

i think that is why she calls me all the time and if anything happened to her i would run away and kill myself then just earlyer today i found out shes moving to oregan and shes not coming back till she can live on her own and thats two years away and i cant live my life for two years without her and i cant go with her caus my mom isnt leting me and treatns to call the cops if i try to sneak out and go with her if you have any advice let me know till then i will be thinking about suicide

[miracle29]

Man...i remember when I was about 17 yrs old. I loved (or thought i did) a guy so much that when i asked him out he shot me down. I was crushed..and I felt suicidal. But it was just a small case of depression and i learned that a person should never react from emotion.

 

I even tried to talk myself into it....its a good thing i'm not a complete idiot...because years later...that same guy i thought was the one....and perfect...was the biggest loser in all of the land.

 

She may be doing you a favor bud...I know he did me one. I'm so happy he shot me down. He was a LEEE OOOO OOO SERRR

[Lita43]

Hey Sweetie!,

Suicide is not the answer and you do have friends. You have new friends here that care and for one I would be so very upset!

There were time's while growing up that I just wanted to end it all and so glad it was never successful, because life is much more than sweet now.

There isn't a person in the world to die for and though you feel like it right now, in time the pain will pass.

I know how much it hurts, but new Loves will come into your life again.

So Sorry that your Mom is alway's working and you don't have a Dad there.

Everybody needs parental support and so lucky I did have my Mom, since my Dad used to beat me up all of the time and was verbally abusive.

Anyway, because of my Dad, I tried committing suicide when I was 12 and then at 18 over a guy that I ended up marrying.

What a huge mistake that was, as I'm still thinking he is the son of the devil and one of the biggest losers on the face of the planet.

Even for all of the hell he put me through, I would still feel sad if he died.

Well I am married to my second husband and we are going on 15 years together now.

I never knew how happy a person could be and was just a blessing that we found each other.

This was on my 28th birthday and the best present I ever got!!!

I have 7 awesome kids and 4 beautiful grandkids and they wouldn't be on this planet if I would have followed through and killed myself.

Life can be a long crappy road, but so worth it when you hang in and stay strong.

Please don't cut anymore, cuz one day you'll go too deep.

Stick around and know that there are people that care, so just write to the forum and we'll get you through this rough spot.

I have to get 3 of my kids up for school in a little bit, make lunches, etc. but I'll be back to check in.

Didn't even have a cup of coffee yet and not all so articulate right now. Yikes!!!

Hang in and I'll be back.

 

Hugs, Lita~

 

God Grant Me The Serenity To Accept The People I Cannot Change, The Courage To Change The One I Can and The Wisdom To Know It's Me!

 

Quote: "A Day You Don't Learn Anything New Is A Day Wasted!"

[Lita43]

Hi Sweetie!,

Just checking on you and noticed you're not set up to received PM's.

Firstly let me say that it is totally insane that people would egg you into commiting suicide or asking when you'll do it. Shame on them!

Hon, these people are not good for you to be around and hope you don't consider any of these people friends.

I will also say that every individual person is unique in their own right and it doesn't matter that you don't play sports or play an instrument.

There are lots of things you can do to have a creative and fullfiling outlet.

Make a list of all of the things you'd like to try or have interest in and focus on that list.

Do you like to read? Write poetry? Draw?

I spent a great deal of time reading at school and was super interested in reading mysteries and couldn't get enough.

Even got asked by the librarian if I wanted to become an assistant. Cool!

Then my friend at school used to buy really thick romance novels and would loan all of her books to me.

Think I managed to get through 2 1/2 books a week and it was so fun to just imagine being in a far away land.

That's what I alway's enjoyed about reading, because it fuel's the imagination.

Also used to write alot of poetry and my earliest stuff is pretty angry, but a way to get my feelings out.

I've since gotten rid of the angry stuff, because I don't want to remember my past that way.

Also drawing or doing art is fun and who know's, maybe you have a hidden talent that you didn't know about.

Do you have anyplace that you could go fishing? Both serene and exciting when you have a good fighter on the line.

What about taking a go at cooking and is a fun and very enjoyable way to be both creative and another talent that you can adopt, so cut on those vegies instead of yourself, ok?

My hubby is an awesome cook and the master chef on the grill and the combination of spices would knock your socks off!!! Yum, yum!!!

Actually my whole family cooks and we do it together.

Have your friend come over and cook with you, cuz it's really fun.

Both of my son's have said at a young age that they wanted to grow up and become chef's, but my oldest is in college to be a school teacher.

Do you have a pet? If not, maybe Mom will let you get one and I personally have 13 and mostly a rodent fetish, plus a cat and a dog.

Having an animal that depends on you for it's care and gives love back is great therapy too!

There really are many joys in this life, so find something that brings a happiness flow from your heart, cuz it's worth it!

Get your PM set up and then I can blah, blah about a bunch of other stuff, ok?

Hang In There and you can PM me anytime!

 

Hugs, Lita~

 

God Grant Me The Serenity To Accept The People I Cannot Change, The Courage To Change The One I Can and The Wisdom To Know It's Me!

 

Quote: "A Day You Don't Learn Anything New Is A Day Wasted!"

[Luke Skywalker]

So, what advice are you looking for here? Are you looking for a reason for living apart from this girl? Are you looking for some way to get this girl to like you? or are you just venting?

 

Meaning in life:

 

- You've mentioned as part of your life-redeeming aspects that you have no talents, or abilities to do anything that can make your life worthwhile. You are at a yonge age, and it is not too late to develop a talent in something. Not merely possessing a talent, or ability is not an excuse, because you can always start developing it now.

 

- I can only tell you that many people, including myself, have found meaning in their lives by seeking after Jesus and the things of God. God has a plan for your life and loves you unconditionally. There is plenty of information about this on the internet if you want to search more into it.

 

Getting this particular girl to like you:

 

- Pheneromones - buy it off the internet, and spray some of it on, and try to talk to her again, see if there is a change of interest. There are usually 30 day money back guarantees on that product.

 

- Gain social status in school, and get up there with the popular guys, I'm sure there is different types of advice on that particular subject that I dont care to get into. Wear popular clothing, haircut, do things that would make you seem popular and raise your social status in that school and get your name out.

 

 

 

 

Venting:

 

- You would ultimately break-up with her anyway, and most teenage relatoinships do not result in marriage and family, they result in an eventual break-up. It's easier now, then if you invested time, energy, and money into a relationship just to see it fall apart some time down the line.

 

 

- I too have had crushes, but never killed myself on it. You can read my thread 'How to Read this Girl if you were me' on the Dating and Shy section, it's the most heavily read thread on the first page of the dating section, if you want company.

[Mateo]

yea i guess suicide might not be the answer but how can i find new people if i cant get her out of my head i cant love anyone else cause i cant stop loving her and when i talk to my best and only friend that i found out the other day likes me more than a friend even though i always talk about the other girl i cant stop thinking of butit kinda makes since cause shes the only one who was there when everything else was bad and she was always willing to listen to my problems even when she has her problems at home also she never trys to make me become a "christian" even though she is thats another thing i like about her cause every other christian i know trys to convert me and that just annoys the * * * * out of me srry about the languge but i had to say it

i wish i would of seen it earlyer though before shes has to leave

[Lita43]

Hi Mateo!,

Glad you're not feeling so suicidal now and everybody just wants you to feel happy in your life.

So I take it that you are an athiest and haven't a belief in God whatsoever, right?

I am a Christian of no denomination as I have not a name other that one who believe's in God and Christ.

You have no belief in any higher power at all???

If not for God in my life, I would not have all 7 of my children be whole and 4 beautiful grandchildren in my life. He is the only reason I didn't die the 2 times I tried commiting suicide.

I have a reason to be here and at my most desperate moments, cried out to him for help, as there was nobody else!!!

My attempts were futile and with good reason as I am supposed to be here with great purpose.

Two of my 7 children were born with birth defects that should have rendered them crippled and retarted (or dead), but through prayer they survived the odds.

It's my "God Mission" to give back what he has given to me!!!

I am meant to be here to try and save the children he allowed to be in this world and will do whatever I can to help!!!

There's not a chance that I don't understand where you're coming from, cuz I've "Been There Done That!" Many times!!!

Life was such a long hard road, but I stuck with it as hard as it was, because I always prayed for God's strength and guidance.

I didn't stick on negativity or self pity, because there was more strength to find deep down in the very being of my soul!

God gave it to me and couldn't do it alone, as I pined for lost loves and my first was for 4 years!!!

It's one of the hardest pains to ever have to deal with, but I never hurt myself by cutting or any of those things, as much as I wanted to die!!!

Pull yourself up by your bootstraps and start talking to yourself in your own head and be positive with your feelings.

It's hard and know you can do it and have more in you than you know!!!

There's nothing worse than feeling like some desperate whimp or loser and it just ticked me off, cuz I knew I was worth a heck of a lot more than that!

You got it! Fight back!!! Don't let the devil take you down!!!

He wants your soul, so be bigger than the devil and "DON'T LET HIM HAVE IT!!!!!"

You have competition here, so be the one who WINS!!! You can if you want and have faith in you sweetie, so "GO FOR IT!!!" and kick some Devil butt!!!!

There are other people who care and just reach for us and we'll be there!!!

 

Hugs, Lita~

 

God Grant Me The Serenity To Accept The People I Cannot Change, The Courage To Change The One I Can and The Wisdom To Know It's Me!

 

Quote: "A Day You Don't Learn Anything New Is A Day Wasted!"

[The Mask]

Dude,i went through exactly what youre going whrough right now...Just hang in there,wait a little bit,take some to be alone and go deep inside of your head..I wont say it will happed today or tomorrow,it may take weeks if not months but when you're deep enough you'll find out that it all just a big nightmare..It will pass..believe me,i once though that this one girl i used to love is everything,beautiful,smart etc is just...How do i say it?An empty shell?

 

Anyways she is just one little b****..I don't want to start on that...But anyways just hang in there..

I waited,and waited..Thought that it's all over,no hope for me...almost killed myself then BAM everything turn around..not by it self but by me..I'm the one who made me happy once more,i'm the one who changed things about myself and gues what?You can do it too!!No one diserves you'r pain..No one..remember that!

 

We're here to help!