What is going on here??

[jcap01]

So, I got a call from my ex this afternoon...she called me from her office in NY. (did not know it was her...if I did I would have ignored the call). I was in a meeting when she called and had to cut things really short with her. I think I also sounded pretty rude... She sounded very happy to hear my voice and she said the reason she was calling was because she wanted to see how my Easter was and to say Happy Easter. I think this is crap though because last thursday, we both said Happy Easter to each other and this is when I initiated no contact and said I didn't want her to contact me in any way anymore. She said she was going to listen to me but apparently she didn't listen and ended up contacting me anyway. I sent her a text back about an hour later..it read:

 

Hi ***,

 

Sorry I cut things so short when you called. I was in a very important meeting. Happy Easter to you too!! I hope you're feeling OK (because she feels sick a lot of the time). Take care of yourself!!

 

I didn't express any interest in her with this text message which I think is a great thing and I did make it sound like I wasn't really going to contact her again. And while I'm writing this post...she is calling my phone again. And she didn't leave a message. What is going on here?? What does everybody else think?

[jcap01]

Terrible,

 

I answered a phone call just now that I was certain it was not her and it was. My call display let's me know when it's a long distance call but this time it showed as a different number. I answered the damn phone and sure enough it was her again! She said, thank you, I got your text message but not all of it (what do you mean not all of it) She asked again how my Easter was, how everybody else was in my family etc and she also said she had a great Easter. I said, that's great but I have to get back to work. She said OK and said she would speak to me later. I again sounded not very interested in talking to her and we were on the phone for about 2 min. Hopefully there won't be later. I don't think I'm going to answer any phone calls anymore. If it's important enough that person can leave a message. Seems as though NC, although is best to get over somebody, does in some cases make the dumper a little stressed out it seems.

[Daddy Bear]

Does anybody else have any feedback?

umm... how about... burn the witch?

 

or at least any pictures you have of her.

[jcap01]

Hi everybody:

 

How's everybody doing today?

 

Well, a new update. I'm not too sure how to feel about this, but this is what happened.

 

This morning at around 6 AM my time (9 AM my ex's time) i receive a text message from her. The funny thing is, is that this text was not meant for me but instead Mr. Greece. The text basically said:

 

"Im worried about your mother, please tell her I will see her.

We can't tell my doc that you are the love of my life and we are getting married. We have to tell him you are just a friend because then you'll be able to stay with me in the O.R. when I have my operation. I love you and I'll see you soon!"

 

I text her back saying:

 

"xxx,

 

It looks like this message was intended for xxx, you should resend it to him..."

 

Got a text back saying:

 

"Thank you for letting me know, that was an important text."

 

I ignored that text and 5 min later receive another text:

 

"I hope I didn't wake you, it's so early over there. Right now in NY the weather is so beautiful."

 

I didn't reply to the last two texts. I didn't really want to.

 

I don't know if she's trying to get a reaction, make me upset or indeed it was just accidentally sent to me. Do woman do this usually when the want to make an ex upset or get them to think about them? I've been very good with NC this past week and not showing any emotion when she does end up contacting me...

 

I mean for the past 3 months I didn't get any accident texts from her intended for Mr. Greece. Even in the history of the text, there were previous texts from me. Is she that retarded? And btw, is it possible to send text messages from the states to phone numbers in europe?

[NubianLove]

sounds suspect, unless u guys have similar names that she can pull up on her phone in mistake, its some BS. I think she did that intentionally, and thats wack!

[jcap01]

Our names both start with j but are different. The fact that it was a reply to a previous text message I sent her a while back makes it very supicious to me...what does everybody else think? She does get ditzed out once in a while.

[jcap01]

And I've just received another text message from her (3 PM her time) saying:

 

xxx, I hope you are well.

 

I told her I was well yesterday when she called! She knows I'm well!

 

Do any women have any insight?

 

I would like to keep writing about my whole situation as it all transpires. Maybe we can all learn something from this situation...and at the same time, I'm sure it will keep making me feel better.

[jcap01]

So everybody,

 

What does everybody think about my ex sending me that text that was intended for her new man? On purpose? By accident?

[Miss M]

Um, her reasons... do they really matter? Do you want her back? After all, she's a liar, manipulative, attention-seeking, selfish, and a two-timer. Are you interested in having some more of that?

[jcap01]

Hi Miss M,

 

I really do not want to be with somebody like that. But because it's a fresh break-up, I still have strong feelings for her. I just want to know what she is doing right now...just for curiosity sake. What do you think in your opinion? The text message that was supposed to be for her new man?

[Miss M]

If it was an innocent mistake, then you should totally ignore it.

 

And if she is using it to get your attention, it worked!

 

Either way, it has set you back, and kept you from moving on. Very unfortunate.

 

I think you should consider how to start ignoring her so you can begin to move on and heal. And I think it's unfortunate that she doesn't have to do much to "distract" you. And unless you can begin to look at what it is in you that responds to her playful tugs on you, I think you're doomed. With very little effort, and without offering you anything at all, she can string you along for a very long time. You definitely shouldn't settle for the crumbs she's tossing at you.

[Daddy Bear]

personally, i do think it may have been an accident. sounds like something that i would do, born out of the combination of old habit and a temporary distraction or buzz.

 

either way--

 

if it was an accident, just ignore it.

 

if it wasn't, just ignore her.

[jcap01]

Slightlybent,

 

This is the text i'm talking about...

 

What do you mean out of habit? A habit of trying to make me crazy? It was a reply to a previous text that I sent a while back! What are the chances that she accidentally sent it to me out of so many other people that she texts in day. All I know is that I'm doing a great job ignoring her and I don't think she likes it too much. Maybe she's figuring it out that she is actually losing me now...

 

She is getting under my skin big time, but I'm not showing her that she is...I really do not know why she has this power over me.

 

I want this girl to come crawling back...like I said, she told me over and over again and still to this day that I'm the nicest man she has ever been with and the only one that has ever loved her...I always treated her like a princess even when she pulled all this crap on me. I just want her to realize and learn a lesson and I'm hoping NC is making her feel this way.

[forallseasons]

There is one thing we can all be sure about the message. And that its bad. It, in no way, signifies anything good for you. So, you should stop wondering about it's intentions. You can ask us and we can guess, with guesses that can only be as good as yours, but we and you will never know the truth behind it.

 

As for this woman...

 

"I want this girl to come crawling back...like I said, she told me over and over again and still to this day that I'm the nicest man she has ever been with and the only one that has ever loved her...I always treated her like a princess even when she pulled all this crap on me. I just want her to realize and learn a lesson and I'm hoping NC is making her feel this way."

 

These are feelings are what many dumpees feel. You can't feel this way, it will set you back. You will go on hoping she breaks under your NC, and when she does, you will easily let her play with you again, or if it doesn't, you will be hurt and disappointed. Right now, you gotta think of NC as nothing to do with her, but everything to do with yourself. Heal, find things to be happy about, enjoy life! Because we all know how ethereal life is. Good luck.

[Daddy Bear]

i know that you have strong feelings about her and i understand how the content of those texts would have made me feel. just going by what i've read here, i don't really think she deserves you.

 

tell me, what do you think would be the high road here, jcap? in my own opinion, what better way is there to not be bothered by someone... than to not be bothered with someone?

[Lady Bugg]

Hi....thanks for the PM. I can't really tell you anything more than the others have. I certainly would cut off contact with her for good...or as long as I could. Seriously. What are you getting out of this? Ask yourself that. Are you happy with this situation? Be 100% honest with yourself. You sound like a nice, decent , honest guy. If everything you've said is true...she doesn't deserve you. PERIOD. Let Mr Greece have her. In fact if she contact you again...I would tell her it would be the LAsT time she would be hearing from you, and for her to have a nice life with him. Mean it..and then do it. I can guarantee you she will attempt to get you back, but be strong.

She has serious issues you or ANY other guy can never cure.

 

Hope that helps.

[Big Jim]

honestly man, read my thread

'about to end all the nonsense",(its kinda long), but you will see that some people are just heartless lairs and you should not give them the time of day. I have been were you are, it blows, and by analzing all her moves, you are only going to go crazy. Forget the b#%ch and move on

[Iceman26]

So everybody,

 

What does everybody think about my ex sending me that text that was intended for her new man? On purpose? By accident?

 

What I think is you should tell her to delete your number, because I am sure you don't want to be receiving those messages.

[Tropigal30]

I often send texts to the wrong people, I once sent a message about a guy I was into to the guy ! instead of to my friend, as I was thinking about him as I was sending it obviously. I also once sent a text intended for my boyfriend to his mother ! as in my phone it had #### then ####'s Mum right after each other. I changed the listing pretty quick I can tell you.

 

Anyway it's quite obvious she's moved on and found someone else, but is trying to be what she thinks is considerate by keeping in touch with you. I'm sure she also still cares about you and wants to keep in contact for that reason as well.

 

Whether you can do that or not is up to you.

 

As far as:

 

"I want this girl to come crawling back...like I said, she told me over and over again and still to this day that I'm the nicest man she has ever been with and the only one that has ever loved her...I always treated her like a princess even when she pulled all this crap on me. I just want her to realize and learn a lesson and I'm hoping NC is making her feel this way."

 

It's all about how much you loved HER and how well you treated HER and how you made HER feel, not how much she was in love with you or that she could imagine forever with you ...

 

Revenge will only make you bitter it isn't a good feeling, and it doesn't help you move on. You need to do whatever makes YOU feel better, if NC isn't doing that then maybe you should talk to her and tell her how you're feeling, but if she doesn't respond in the way you want will this make you feel better or worse ?

 

Just focus on what you need to do for you. Nothing you do will make her want you back but if you are revengeful and bitter it may make her not want to know you.

[jcap01]

Hi Tropigal,

 

Thank you for your post...

 

I'm not really sure what this woman is thinking. She is pretty up and down a lot of the time.

 

If she wanted to just be my friend and let me go, why did she lie to me the past 3 months? Why was she sending me emails and texts for the past 3 months saying she wants to see me, that we should see each other soon that I'm the most wonderful man on earth, always keep her close etc, etc?

 

She even wants to come to Canada and see me for some reason (wants to lie to her new man and say she's coming on a business trip). What is this all about.

 

NC is working for me and it's definitely making me feel better. She promised she wouldn't call (last thursday). I told her it was too hard to talk to her and if she wanted me to move on, she shouldn't contact me anymore. This week she called me, text me etc. Making excuses like saying Happy Easter when we already told each other happy easter last thursday (easter is over now!!)... It definitely doesn't sound like she's moved on that's for sure. She is contacting her ex-fiancee, while she is comitted to another man?? I think she's just confused about everything. If she wanted to just be my friend, she wouldn't contact me knowing it would make me upset. Friends don't do that to friends.

 

And as for the text message...she didn't pull my name out of her address book...it was a reply to a message I had sent her last week...

 

I'm willing to let this woman go and live her life (i really want to move on with my life), but it seems as though she doesn't want me to move on and live my life and is not letting me by contacting me when I asked her not to. I believe she's scared to lose me forever. I've changed a lot in the last two weeks. I was making the mistake of asking her to give me another chance, but that's changed and I don't even make an attempt to contact her in any way. 3 weeks ago, I changed my home phone number and she called my cell phone like crazy, text me like crazy, called my cousin, called my parents, just to get my new number.

 

I'll never act revengfull in any way. I've always been a nice guy and it's not in me to do. I would just like her to know she made a mistake. I'm not sure that day will come or not...but I can live with it either way. I can go away happy knowing I've always been a true gentleman to the woman that I thought (and still do to some extent) was the love of my life.