Having a big downer today. NC for 3 weeks strong...

[coldheart]

Just when I think I am finally getting past acceptance and into the healing process, I get a huge downer and go into depression mode. That's the type of day I am having today. My breakup was mutual and about 4 weeks ago. I have been actively going out, having a good time, and dating some girls here and there. Why do I still feel this way?

 

I know that I took a big part in the downward spiral of the relationship with my predominant character, but did I really deserve it this way? Me and my ex were like soulmates. Manufactured for one another. We had a peaceful and mutual breakup, then next thing I know is that she is as cold as ice, not wanting to talk with me anymore, wanting to just move on, and dating someone as early as a week after the breakup. I really really want to get this stage over with and move on but I can't help the seldom thought about everything we had that just pops in to my mind at random moments.

 

I have allot of new things in my life such as new car, new house, new gym routine, and this has helped me move on to a certain extent. However the lack of "that special someone" to share it all with creates a real bad emptiness inside. I really want to get over this ASAP. I don't even frequent the town where she lives anymore, for fear of seeing her and get that trembling effect that I got last time I saw her in public.

 

Please help me find the best way to get through this undieing emptiness!

 

CH

[taleahmage]

aww hun, I'm sorry you feel so empty sometimes. You really can't rush it tho. The emptiness will subside with time. As I was once told that you have to bury yourself in things that keep your mind busy. I know that's not always easy to do. When my ex and I broke up, it was very difficult for me especially since I was pregnant as well. I actually imagined a string tied from me to him and cutting it to release the hold. Of course here it is almost 4 years later and I've just now met someone who completes my day. He's semi dealing with your similar situation. He was married to a woman whom he thought of as his soulmate. She wants nothing more to do with him now (more than 2 years later), but his stomach still flipflops each time he sees her. So, give it some time hun. It gets easier... I promise.

[coldheart]

taleahmage, thanks for the uplifting words. It is certainly tough at times, but I am thankful to have started brand new on a lot of things (House, car, gym) including having a roommate that is my best friend living with me. He went through 2 heartbreaks and is on my same boat. We grieve together and comfort each other when in need. I guess I have to ride out this storm of "ups and downs" and hope that the "downs" slowly begin to subside. It's only the beginning (4 weeks)... sigh...

 

CH