im just worried..

[radiotone]

i've had a long distance relationship for almost 3 years. she lives 4 hours away. we met numerous times but for some reason she's never visited me. it was always me over there. we connect a lot, we have fun. but we ran into a lot of problems concerning the distance and how physical we get. we managed to make it through them but almost a few weeks ago i started getting really unhappy with the relationship and just felt like i wanted someone who lived near me so i can see them all the time. just basically wanting the physical part..

 

so we decided to take a break. during this break, i met a girl who was already in a relationship and we hung out and i had a lot of fun. i felt as if i was interested in her and she was interested in me. but nothing happened because she's in a relationship and i have no clue on how she feels about me. so i became depressed. i then decided it to break up with my long distance girlfriend of whom i was taking a break from. but as we were talking, i brought up everything i had a problem with. the visits. how rare we saw each other. how much i needed contact. and somehow we managed to not break up and just decide that we were going to work on it again. work harder on our problems and try to satisfy our needs..

 

i really do feel a lot for her. i've known her for a long time and she really does attract me both emotionally and physically. it's just the distance that ruined everything. but now we're still together and we promised eachother that we're going to work on everything.

 

but the thing is, i'm scared now. i dont know why. i just feel like.. if everything does work out between us.. i'll miss out on so many things. i especially feel like this when i remember how much fun i had with that girl i saw. i dont know why. i connected with her but i didn't connect so much as i did with my girlfriend.

 

i really thought i felt a lot for that one girl but.. i guess it was just that one night. and it appears she doesn't seem as interested as i was. and i wasn't even sure if she was serious about not being happen in HER relationship.

 

i'm sorry for the long post. but i just need some insight. i am going to talk about all of this with my girlfriend but.. i'm just looking for some insight now.

 

thank you.

[tylercdurden2004]

Its never the distance. People will make it work as long as both are willing to make the effort. She apparently does not. I heard it all from my friends when i was in a LDR. Things like "they never work" , "they fail more often". Well truth be told every relationship your in 'fails" until you find the one you want to be with and distance is irrelevant. Yes it makes for different challenges than close by relationships but it also creates soem wonderful opportunies, distance can create that longing for the other person, you get to do things you might put off if you are living with someone etc. The important thing is both people have to want it enough to put the effort forward regardless of distance.

[neolithic]

unless you are looking for "the one" right now at the ripe old age of 19, then long distance relationships ARE hard, really hard! i couldn't even do it with this guy i dated for a few years when we lived in the same city. and we only tried a LDR for a couple months! i personally need to see him often, touch him, kiss him, do all those things. i know if i found "the one" i'd do whatever it took to keep him mine, but until then.. i don't know.

 

i know it's a complicated situation for you. i definitely relate with wanting someone close by. and i think for your age, you WILL miss out on things if you're focused on some girl that lives a ways away.

 

but if you really really care about her.. well then it's your choice to make. but i think now's the time to go on dates, find what you like, find what you don't like, be around girls, develop good social skills in the dating realm.. stuff like that..