I dont think I'm a Christian anymore

[Blured]

Well, in short, I was born into a very Christian family, and my faith has been a real strength for me over the years. I was bullied a few years ago and to pray felt like I was actually doing something. I have doubted the existence of God before, but never like this.

 

When I'm in church I see everyone else worshipping (waving their arms in the air in various ways, singing etc. Sounds kind of werid I know!) and though it looks like they are getting something spiritually out of it, what if they aren't? What if Christianity is just some bizarre illusion where everyone sees everyone else doing it and seems to think there is something they are missing out on?!

 

Honestly, I'd rather be a Christian than not, I suffer from depression and the idea of hope was such a blessing.. But if I dont believe it, it's not like I can just pretend that I do. I dont really have anything going for me in life.

 

I'd apprechiate any kind of feedback.

[ravens_folly]

well I'm not really a pronounced Christian persay...

but I do believe in the existence of god and i do sometimes go to church.

 

But depression is something that is hard to deal with regardless so it would be hard on your faith.

 

However... the more I read and learn about the Bible - a very misunderstood book, the more I believe in the existence of god.

I am still learning. I want to learn more so that I can understand all the things that go on in this world. A lot of it doesn't make sense and no one can understand how "God" would allow the world to be like this, but things always happen for a reason.

 

I am not exactly sure what kind of answer your looking for, but I always say that if you are lacking hope and feeling in dispair... try to understand your situation and see what is going for you. Amidst ALL the bad things in your life, there ARE good things. No matter how crappy life seems in this western world... we are so lucky in so many ways that its not even funny in comparison to how good we have it compared to millions. We complain about things that many people would give an arm and a leg just to have.

 

When I feel depressed and feel like there is no god and how could my life be so crappy... well its not. Bad things happen to EVERYONE. And no matter how bad it seems, someone else always has it worse than you. Just find the small good thigns everyday and although sometimes we may not have control over our lives at certain times, we will again and we can make the best out of our lives. Its all up to us.

[friscodj]

I was raised Catholic and for 18 years essentially had the faith and the associated practices ingrained into my mind and lifestyle. I got real tired of it and found myself questioning everything and essentially "going through the motions." Then I left home...and along with it...the faith...

 

Then after about 4-5 years of growing up (19-22) and "finding myself", I had some hard times befall me. The only person I had left to turn to was God...and He really helped me through my struggles...

 

SO...

 

My advice to you is to give it up, be the Prodigal Son (Luke 15:11-32) and go off on your spiritual "own" and I firmly believe He will come back into your life at some point down the road and be much more appreciated because of the time away...

[ElektraHere]

I too struggle if their really is a higher power. When I feel down and low I pray it just seems a natural thing to do. Sometimes it helps sometimes it doesn't. A girlfriend of mine gave me "A Purpose Driven Life" by Rick Warren. There are some great things in that book. I would suggest looking into that or another inspirational book I read long ago when I was down was "Illusions, The Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah" by Richard Bach. Now that book really inspired me. Maybe I should go buy it today

 

I don't think worrying if others are getting anything of religon will help you. Just focus on your faith. As for the depression talk to your pastor or someone you highly trust to talk about your feelings. Also you could look into medication not all people like that route but sometimes it acts as a buffer while you deal with the depression.

Good Luck

[AwdreeHpburn]

I'll try to tread lightly but I do want to say something.

 

I am a devout and very strong, practicing atheist. Bad things and depression does happen to eveyone. I agree with Ravens Folly there. And I agree with the go off on your spiritual own as Friscodj suggested.

 

My advice in line with that is discover and uncover for yourself. Read, read, read, and when you think you've read enough to make a decision, read some more.

 

Read it all. Read the koran, the bible, the jewish one (sorry, I forgot, I mean no disrespect - Torah?? ) all of them. The Buddist way, Hindu all of it. Science journals. Push your mind to its limits. Accept NOTHING as fact until YOU can prove it. Not someone else for you but YOU.

 

The best way to make any decision, spiritual or otherwise is informed.

[elaineska]

I went to a Christian school until 7th grade, but I did not like it one bit. I was picked on (for not going to church every Sunday - by kids AND looked down on by teachers). It sometimes felt that everyone's goal was to be the most pious, if that makes sense, when they were really quite unfriendly to me and my family.

 

I now resent the whole experience at that school and don't call myself a Christian. But maybe years down the road I will again. I know what you're going through.

[friscodj]

I went to a Christian school until 7th grade, but I did not like it one bit. I was picked on (for not going to church every Sunday - by kids AND looked down on by teachers). It sometimes felt that everyone's goal was to be the most pious, if that makes sense, when they were really quite unfriendly to me and my family.

 

Wow... That's absolutely terrible...

 

Find your faith for yourself, not for someone else...

[DaMadHatter]

I'm on the other spectrum that Ta ree saw is, i'm a devout believer in the almighty lord, and my faith in him is unwavering.

 

We all go through trials and tribulations, we all come to a point in our life where we question everything including the exisense of god. This is completely normal and even healthy to a point. It's sometimes hard to imagine a higher power when we are down and out. You ask yourself many "what if" questions. Let's say you're right and christianity is just an illusion. Would ur life have been misspent believing in something as positive and wonderful as GOD? I think not.

 

U will have to find your way through this period in your life. I agree that you should take a look at yourself and inform yourself some more. But I completely disagree that you should "accept NOTHING as fact until YOU can prove it. Not someone else for your but YOU." If you undertake this attitude you'll be defeating the purpose of your spiritual journey. As you well know the christian faith is built on FAITH, we believe GOD does not need to give reasons or proof to arrogant humanity to believe in him, we believe proof of his existence is everywhere.

 

On your journey to find your faith in god or not please don't make the mistake of mistaking GOD for religion. Pastors, popes, churches, rituals, wars, dogmas are not i repeat are NOT GOD. Look inside yourself and ask what events have led you to this moment of spiritual disbelief? Speak directly to him, he will listen.

 

Some say GOD is a crutch for the weak who can't fathom being all alone in this existence. I say GOD...IS ..this existence. Good luck on your journey!

[shes2smart]

I love God...it's his groupies I can't stand.

 

Basically, I believe that a relationship with God/Spirit/Higher Power/the Universe/whatever-you-choose-to-call-that-thing-larger-than-ourselves is something intensely personal. No one else can define your relationship with Him/Her/It for you, which pretty much leaves out an organized religion laying it all out for you in an easy-to-understand package.

 

I'm more likely to feel closer to that Source when I'm out in nature than an organized church service.

 

How's this for a Freudian Slip Typo....when I first went to type "church service" I typed church surface. Guess that prety much tells ya what I think about organized religion.

 

Some people want/need the structure of an organized religion...for others, that place is just a starting point for a more personal journey.

[AwdreeHpburn]

I didn't mean to appear arrogant or use this as a personal platform for my stance on religion.

 

I don't take back what I said however about learning as much as you can. Whether or not one chooses to believe should be a personal and informed decision and not based on others influence...

 

To be honest, it sounds to me like Blured is at a place where he is asking to be talked back into some sort of spirituality, but I think he wants it to be HIS decision.

 

Blured - I got a bunch of sadness from your post and I wanted to say that I think you can find happiness with or without spirituality. I don't at all mean to offend or talk you out of being Christian. I just wanted to represent the other side.

 

Being an atheist or a faith based believer has nothing to do with depression. I too get depressed and without a higher power or prayer, I manage to pull out of it or get help or whatever. I just wanted it known that that CAN be done.

 

No offense to anyone who gets better with prayer...

[Ghostrider4042005]

i'm caught in the middle between christianity and buddhism because i know a god exsists but i don't always believe in Him and i found buddhism somewhere in between and it's more of an understanding religion and it's helping me more than christianity is (i'm not pushing you one way or the other i'm just saying what it's done to me)

[friscodj]

Look, the bottom line is that any religion that believes in a higher power of goodness, no matter if it is organized or not, is sorely needed in today's day and age and can only ultimately serve to benefit you and those who come in contact with you.

 

Don't worry so much about the specifics as long as you are doing some good in the world...

[ShySoul]

I love God...it's his groupies I can't stand.

 

Basically, I believe that a relationship with God/Spirit/Higher Power/the Universe/whatever-you-choose-to-call-that-thing-larger-than-ourselves is something intensely personal. No one else can define your relationship with Him/Her/It for you, which pretty much leaves out an organized religion laying it all out for you in an easy-to-understand package.

 

I'm more likely to feel closer to that Source when I'm out in nature than an organized church service.

 

I'm going with shes2smart on this one (and why not, she's to smart ).

 

I have nothing against organized religion (well, accept one because of a personal experience), I just think that all too often they lose sight of the larger picture for the details. People can be so caught up in preaching and reciting from the Bible, encouraging others to go to church and turn their life over to the lord..... that they lose sight of what's really important. Spreading the message and how you express it becomes bigger then the actual message itself. I've known people who claimed to be great Christians, who went to church and then as soon as church ended, did things that directly violated what the preacher was giving a sermon about that day.

 

I personally find that God would want us to concentrate on doing the right thing and helping others. To me, spending an hour (or 2 or 3 or....) in church each week isn't what God would want. Jesus was humble, son of a carpenter and associated with outcasts. So would he really want us to worship him? Or would he be more likely to want us to spend that time giving back to others and making the world a beter place? Spending hours volunteering is my way to worship.

 

I had a book once for a comparative religion project that showed different passages from various holy books and how they were nearly identical. The same basic values and message appears in just about all religions. Thus, does it matter what religion we are? Or is what important how we treat one another, coming together to celebrate life....no matter how you believe it came to be, or what lies beyond it.