Is it ok?

[sweetheart230]

I don't have a booming social life. Last year I went to parties and drank a lot. This year, I kind of do my own thing. I don't have tons of friends, but I have a few that I really like a lot. I'm pretty busy with studying, work, staying in shape and other stuff like that. I don't really do school activities because there's nothing I'm interested in. But I'm planning on taking guitar, tennis or sailing lessons this summer (money's an issue right now).

 

I've worked through two of my biggest issues: self acceptance and getting over him. I feel much better. But I wonder if I should work harder at my social life and meeting people. I came to the conclusion that once I am happy, it will just fall into place. Once I was ready for love, love would just come. But maybe I'm making a mistake.

 

I don't meet a whole lot of people in my daily life, so I guess I wonder if I should make more of an effort and go to parties and make lots of friends. To be honest, I'm feeling pretty content right now. But what if I regret later in life that I did not seize the opportunity to make friends and meet lots of guys when I was young. Everyone says that a girl my age should have like three boyfriends and go out on dates like crazy.

 

Should I really be working toward that? Is the only real way you get yourself out there and find love to work hard at having a social life? Or should I just continue working toward happiness and trust that the rest will just fall into place naturally?

 

In other words, I guess I'm asking, what worked for you? Is it ok to trust that things will fall into place if I just relax or should I work harder at this whole dating thing?

[jo.mcqueen]

Ok I'm female and 27 like you I only have a few good friends! I think a few good friends who care about you are a lot better that 100's of friends who don't give a dam!

 

Is your concern more meeting someone to settle down with?

[sweetheart230]

Well eventually I'd like to meet someone to settle down with. I'm not in any rush, but I'd like it to happen sometime.

[fishrrshortae]

wow

you sound just like me

so here goes:

 

if you're content now, be realistic and ask yourself, do you really WANT a boyfriend right now? If you do, then yes, I would say definitely try to put yourself out there more. Love often does not just "happen" ... it takes work to find someone you like. Just like you would be proactive about finding a job you like, I think it definitely takes energy to find someone you connect with.

 

That being said, you sound like you're not quite sure about what you want... There's no reason at all to have tons of guys and going out on dates all the time, if that's not what makes you happy. And perhaps by doing everything that YOU want to do (ie your plans for the summer) you may meet someone that you hve something in common with .. Maybe not ..

 

but either way, before you put yourself out there, make absolutely sure that it's even what you want in the first place.

 

Cuz ladies, we all know that boyfriends are work!! ](*,)