mitchy_bn Posted January 17, 2006 Share Posted January 17, 2006 Ok, I'm just 16, but I'm feeling bad already and all cuz of my two best friends and their stupid dare. I told them already that if I'm to lose him, my love, I won't talk to them again. It's about me and these friends I thought were my best friends, they call me Mitchy (short for Mitchelle). Well see on the 3rd of this month, that's when I got their dare. I thought at first playing the dare game with them and then getting money in return was fun, we would dare each other. Well, I guess u all r asking why is this thread on infidelity, here goes, and yes I do feel bad about this whole mess, it was their idea not mine. Well see there is this dude at school, he's in 11th grade, he's the ungliest with lots of pimples on his face, kinda chubby and yes, some people teased him, he's a loner with no date. The dare my two friends told me about in which in return I would receive $20 from them was this : To ask that dude (yuck) out and keep him interest for 17 days before finally dumping him and telling him it was just a prank me and my friends play. So in 3 more days, it would finally be over and I would get my money. But, damn, I almost got caught on the movies 5 days ago, there I was with him, well thing is he's starting to like me and well that day he kissed me, had to go along with it, but see very far away there was my b/f and his friend Tony, well that was a close one, I told him I didn't feel good that I ate something bad and took off running, yes I was tripping over lots of people, then got to my car and drove home. I can't imagine how it would had been if I were to get cuaght, needless to say I did felt bad right away. I did indeed told my friends when they proposed me the dare, I was like "Well I dunno, that's crazy, don't I have a b/f" They were like "Ohy relax, is not like ur going to * * * * him, just a few dates and then dump him, so ok I went along it. Well yesterday my b/f and tells me something he thought was funny, he tells me about he and his friend seeing a girl running like crazy, tripping over everyone (he doesn't know that was me) ok so I go along it. Now I have another date with him to the movies, had one with b/f togother, and damn lie to him, say I was gonna do nothing cuz of hws, already feeling bad. Yes, I'm in a mess now, he's calling and must be thinking I like him, worst part is when he ask if I was single, I told him yes. Oh great, now I just betray two people, the one I love and this ugly dude. But, I dunno, when I get my money, I dunno if I should tell b/f about this whole thbing, I feel like I like cheated on him. Link to comment
mitchy_bn Posted January 17, 2006 Author Share Posted January 17, 2006 The thing I gotta mostly be careful with is we all are from the same school. Link to comment
RayKay Posted January 17, 2006 Share Posted January 17, 2006 You ARE cheating on him and even more horrible, is you and your friends are doing something absolutely despicable to this boy. You are being bullies, and absolutely horrid to another human being. How would you like it if your bf came to you dumped you and told you it was all a prank, and that there was no way on earth he would ever willingly be with you. This is horribly cruel...to your boyfriend AND to this boy you are pranking. Link to comment
mitchy_bn Posted January 17, 2006 Author Share Posted January 17, 2006 I know, wut now? I feel bad, this was my friends idea and I went stupidyly for the money, when I have a good relation, oh * * * *, I dunno if b/f will like take me back after this if I'm to tell him that, the prank. Link to comment
lillady898 Posted January 17, 2006 Share Posted January 17, 2006 Have you ever once considered how wrong what you're doing is? It is cruel. How would you feel in either your boyfriend or this other completely innocent boy's shoes? How would you feel is someone did that to someone in your family? Or to a friend? Trust me, you don't love your boyfriend. If you did, you would not have taken the dare. Break it off with both of them and grow up. Link to comment
mitchy_bn Posted January 17, 2006 Author Share Posted January 17, 2006 Yea, I know can't believe I did it, but yes I do love my b/f, just I never thought I would be cheating, it never cross my mind before. I dunno now, but I feel like telling that dude the truth, not talking to my friends who I thought were good friends and telling my b/f, no I have never lied before, I'm not that type of person that lies and cheats, yet can't believe this is happening. I'm thinking of telling b/f sometime today about all this. Link to comment
mitchy_bn Posted January 17, 2006 Author Share Posted January 17, 2006 Yes at the same time, it'll hurt him and that other dude, but I don't wanna lie no more. Then I guess I would have to do lots of convincing and rebuilding, I dunno, I heard somewhere that it's never the same after cheating, then comes the other possibility, that he just breaks up and gives me no chance, I dunno. Link to comment
lillady898 Posted January 17, 2006 Share Posted January 17, 2006 Please do tell... both of them. Otherwise it just isn't fair to either. Although you have made a big and cruel mistake, atleast you recognize it as a mistake and are willing to be honest about it. That is a lot more than many people can say. Remember not to completely blame your friends for this. You were in on it just as much as them (if not, more, for actually preforming the actions) and had the control to stand up and tell them you weren't going to do it. Learn from this mistake, and choose your friends wisely. Link to comment
kellbell Posted January 17, 2006 Share Posted January 17, 2006 Ok....I am with the others and what you are doing is so cruel. If you feel as bad as you say you do...fess up and come clean. You might loose some friends but those are the consequences for being mean to others. Forget the stupid $20. How would you like that to happen to you? I would also consider looking for new friends in the meantime. Link to comment
Boricua7 Posted January 17, 2006 Share Posted January 17, 2006 You're the kind of girl other girls were afraid to go to school because of! How could you be so inconsiderate of other people's feelings!? I'm sorry if I sound mean but I hope you get what's coming to you because what you're doing is just wrong! Don't blame your actions on the fact that it was "their idea" and not yours. You went along with it which is worse because it means you don't have a mind of your own. Expect for your boyfriend to dump you. Expect for this "ugly dude" to hate you for the rest of his life. Expect to lose these so called "friends" soon because no real friend would ever put you up to anything like this for any amount of money. Link to comment
mitchy_bn Posted January 17, 2006 Author Share Posted January 17, 2006 Ok, thanx, gonna tell them both sometime today. Hope, my b/f decides to give me second chance. Link to comment
Lonelyinasmalltown Posted January 17, 2006 Share Posted January 17, 2006 Be 100% honest with yourself, after doing this incredibly cruel thing to this poor guy do you really think you deserve to walk away completely unscathed? I mean, what you're doing is the kind of thing that scars people for life. I know from personal experience. I was that guy. Honestly I thought I went back in time reading what you wrote. All I know is that if I saw the girl who did to me what you're doing to that guy in a burning building, I'd throw a pail of gasoline on the fire. 14 years later and I still have that much hatred towards her. Expect the same. At least in my case the girl was single. Funny thing is this, people in school don't stay the same way that they were in school. At least I didn't. 12 years after school, I'm shaped up, got a very high paying job and am incredibly happy with myself. Heck, I even date the odd model or two, local ones anyway. The best thing is that the girl who did to me got what she deserved, I stop by at McDonald's every once and and see her there. Karma's a pain.... Sorry about that, to be completely unjudgemental, you're not completely blameless in this. For $20 you decided to try to destroy someone's self-esteem and cheat on your boyfriend with a boy you don't even like. It might have been someone else's idea, but it was you who went through with it. Do yourself a favor and get some real friends. Maybe your boyfriend will take you back, who knows? I know I wouldn't want someone who's willing to do something that cruel to someone that also involves cheating. Link to comment
coollady1957 Posted January 17, 2006 Share Posted January 17, 2006 Oh my, you are doing such a horrible thing. I just dont even have the words to truly say what i feel on this. I am just appalled at the whole thing. Link to comment
Itsok Posted January 17, 2006 Share Posted January 17, 2006 That is possibly one of the cruelest and meanest things I have heard in a long time. Way to go. Not only are those people not your friends, but you have a cruel heart to even consider doing something like that to someone for 20 bucks! If you wonder why there are people in high school who commit suicide, take a peek in the mirror. What would you feel like if someone did that to you? You'll get what you deserve out of this one. Link to comment
TheLegend Posted January 17, 2006 Share Posted January 17, 2006 yeah ok apart from what she did, she saw what she did was wrong and she's just trying to be better guys, I say everyone should stop flaming and start thinking of this girl since she IS trying to do something to turn this back to normal, that's why she IS here.. I think the ones that deserve to be flamed are the ones who act this way and not notice the harm/effects of their actions on other kids.. So since she is here, she probably is here to get advice on how to improve things, not because she wants to hear us flaming, I'm sure she understood she shouldn't have done that.. As an advice?.. I think you should tell your boyfriend about the bet and I think you should just tell that other poor guy you've met someone else, and not tell him about the bet since that'd really hurt him if you ask me.. Link to comment
coollady1957 Posted January 17, 2006 Share Posted January 17, 2006 all in all it does appear that she has realized she did a bad bad thing. And i am still appalled that it happened. I would suggest coming clean and make amends for what has been done. THis thing that you have done could be so damaging. I Hope you get this cleared up and things work out for you. Next time just stop and think of the harm things like this could do before you react to doing it. Yes you are young yet, but old enough to know the right and wrongs of how you treat others. Link to comment
darkblue Posted January 17, 2006 Share Posted January 17, 2006 I won't lecture: I think what you did was immature and selfish - and you should come clean. Find some peace with being honest, and truthful. Link to comment
BellaDonna Posted January 17, 2006 Share Posted January 17, 2006 That is so terribly sad. I really feel bad for the boy you did this too. You really can't hurt a person any deeper than that. Prentending to like someone is quite low. You need to tell him the truth- and apologize in a MAJOR way. Does your school have a newspaper? If so, if I were you- I would apologize publicly in the school newspaper and also write about what you've learned from this (which I HOPE you learned something). Also, step one to becoming a better person is to stop blaming your friends for it. Just because they came up with the idea- didn't mean you had to do it. Take full responsibility for your actions. Try to make 20 bucks in a better way next time- why not get a real job to occupy your time- like working in the community helping people who need it the most (the elderly, people with disabilities, the poor). You don't have to feel horrible about this forever- do something to make it right, BellaDonna Link to comment
good_charlotte_freak2 Posted January 17, 2006 Share Posted January 17, 2006 Theese people don't seem like real friends.And 20$ is lame. It's not gunna buy you much theese days anywyas. Link to comment
Down-In-A-Hole Posted January 17, 2006 Share Posted January 17, 2006 Although she seems to lack the maturity to acknowledge just how devastating this news is going to be for the other guy, I agree that she does deserve a little credit for scoping out this site and seeking advice. My advice is to forget worrying about losing your boyfriend for the time being and start thinking of how you're going to console this other guy that you decieved. These dates with you were probably some of the highlights of his life, so keep that in mind when letting him down. Be as kind as possible and expect him to be very upset with you, but you should accept all of the blame. He's the innocent victim in this little game of yours, and he has the right to be angry at you. After you take care of that, then worry about consoling your boyfriend. Link to comment
Dannysgirl Posted January 17, 2006 Share Posted January 17, 2006 Oh My God, that is just awful! I really don't know what to advise you to do. On the one hand telling the truth is always best, but what are you going to say? 'My friends dared me to go on a couple of dates with 'an ugly dude' like you for $20?' What do you think that will do to his self esteem? As much as I abhor lying, it might be kinder in this instance to tell him you have met someone else at least he'll be able to get over that a bit quicker than knowing that you and your friends find him so groteque looking that you were willing to completely crush his self esteem for $20! You really do need to tell your boyfriend the truth though and drop these so called bully friends of yours. I really don't understand this mentality, I realise you're young but why on earth would you care so much about somebody else's perceived 'ugliness' to put this much effort into hurting them? Could it be that you and your friends are a little insecure about your own looks? Either that or your see yourself as being 'better' than this boy because he's 'ugly' but you're no better than anybody regardless of looks or popularity - remember that. I had things like this done to me at school because I was a late bloomer (didn't start puberty till pretty late) and I just couldn't believe that people could be so mean for absolutely no reason. Funnily enough a few years later the very same people were clamouring for a date and I wouldn't give them the time. What goes around certainly comes around! Link to comment
TheLegend Posted January 17, 2006 Share Posted January 17, 2006 I agree with Dannysgirl, I'm not sure if telling the truth to the guy is the best thing to do in this situation, actually I'm pretty sure it's not the best thing to do BUT what happens if he hears about the "bet" from someone else.. That's another question that should be considered.. I still say you should just tell him you're together with your ex or something and STOP communicating with that kid.. He might hear about the "bet" from your friends but the chances are he won't believe them..(Hopefully?) Because I think if he learns about that, it'd be really bad for his self esteem.. But yeah, it is a difficult decision.. Link to comment
Boricua7 Posted January 17, 2006 Share Posted January 17, 2006 Be careful whose feeling's you toy with. Some people are psycho. You don't want this kid to go Carrie on you or anything. Link to comment
evy38 Posted January 18, 2006 Share Posted January 18, 2006 Bumping this one up. Did you ever do the right thing and fess up to everybody involved in this mess you made? Link to comment
Mr Mister1 Posted November 12, 2006 Share Posted November 12, 2006 I'm curious, what was this "ugly" guy like in person? Was he as gross as you thought he was from a distance? Link to comment
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